How boring! Who gives me some jokes? I want to laugh! Give points for being funny?

I have nothing to do in the office today, playing with magnets.

The leader saw it and reached for it.

As a result, the magnet was attracted by the leader's gold ring, which was embarrassing. ...

My friend lives on the second floor and has a cat. If the cat makes a mistake, she will grab it by the neck and throw it out of the window.

Once I was playing at her house, the cat came in for a stroll and accidentally knocked over the coke with one paw.

Then he looked at his friend for a few seconds, slowly walked to the window sill and planted it sideways. ...

The master of the canteen is probably lovelorn, because I found that the newly changed menu has a different scenery:

Charming lotus root slices, heartbroken people patting cucumbers, chubby face lifting, reminiscing about lentils, dim bean curd, pure moo Shu pork.

My friend's grandmother is old and forgetful.

Grandma was very happy when he came home from vacation. She let her friends eat here and there every day.

After more than half a month, grandma finally couldn't help it and asked her friend's mother, "Whose child is this so annoying!" I stay in our house every day to eat and cheat! "

ABCD is having a party.

My son, he has a bright future. He became CEO and gave his friend a Mercedes as a birthday present.

B: My son, the plane crashed and his friend flew around the world for free on his birthday.

My son is a real estate agent. He gave his friend a villa as a birthday present.

D: My son is gay, but he received a Mercedes-Benz and a villa on his birthday and took a trip around the world.

A science student cursed: "You are simply the solution set of X+2 > 4!" It took me a long time to realize that the answer is "2 to positive infinity"

Everyone inside knows that it is normal to work overtime and stay up late every day, and it is even more impossible. One weekend, everyone was busy all morning. At eleven o'clock, a colleague suddenly got up, dropped a word and rushed out. He said: You are busy. I'll be back when I get married. . .

A couple in the car, the woman was touched by a pervert, and her boyfriend was expressionless. After arriving at the station, her boyfriend pulled the pervert out of the car, beat him skillfully and took his girlfriend away.

Analysis of the reasons for a website's voting. 75% voted "This kid is waiting for his skills to cool down ..."

A young man sat at the door of the bird's nest, looking depressed.

The policeman came over and asked, "Didn't you get the ticket for Rolling Stone for 30 years today?" The young man took out two tickets. The policeman was surprised and asked him why he didn't go in.

The young man said, "I want to call the girl I secretly love." The girl asked what concert it was, but as soon as I said' get out', the phone died. "

In the street, a couple quarreled, and the woman slapped the man.

The man roared, "Can you slap me again?"

The woman slapped again without hesitation.

The man paused and took the woman's hand: "Since you are so obedient, stop arguing and go home."

The boss asked me, "Can you come to work this Saturday?" I know you like to play on weekends, but I really need you here. "

"Yes, no problem. But as you know, the bus on the weekend is so bad that it is estimated to be a little late. "

"Well, when do you think you can come?"

"Monday."

A person in the hospital infusion, lost began to laugh wildly.

Others asked him what he was laughing at.

He said, "I smiled a little ..."

This morning, a beautiful colleague formally asked me, "Are you free to invite people to dinner tonight?"

I said shyly and reserved, "Yes."

She said, "Then you will be on duty for me, thank you."