What's so funny about meeting a thief?

It's funny to think about it now. I experienced it myself, but it was a few years ago.

I was born in the countryside. There are no buildings in the village. The tallest building is a two-story building, but there are many bungalows. In our rural areas, the wedding day is mostly in the twelfth lunar month before the Spring Festival, because people who go out at that time basically go back to their hometown countryside, that is, when there are many people in the village, they can help each other, and when there are many people, it is more lively.

There is a young man in his twenties getting married in our village. The day before the wedding, we all went to help and prepare for the wedding day in advance. On the wedding day, the groom and some people got up early and went to the bride's house to meet her. The rest of us are waiting at their door to pick up the bride, ready to make trouble with her. It's almost dawn, and the car to pick up the bride is coming. A group of young people gathered around before getting off the bus. After the groom got off the bus, he picked up the bride and walked inside. These young people are crazy and just take the bride away. Seeing these noisy people outside, the bride was completely wrapped in the middle and couldn't get out. At this time, a bride's family who is a dowry came over. This woman is not an idle generation. She caught these noisy brides and dragged them far away. She's really strong, and she's mumbling to get out of here. It seems to be "cold water to wash your ass, really impatient", so I have been busy for a long time.

In the evening, we also have a wedding ceremony there. At 9: 00 10, when the bride and groom are ready to rest, we will find a ladder to climb over the wall quietly, which means "listen." This cannot be found by the bride and groom. Hehe, it's not fun when it's discovered. The key is that it is colder at night in winter. After turning over, we have to control our breathing for fear of being found. A few people slowly leaned over and squatted under the window, waiting for the noise to happen. Just then, a partner's nose was frozen out, which was quite long, but he couldn't suck it in. He was very quiet when he smoked, lying in the trough, and several people had a pair of eyes. Seeing him like this, he couldn't help laughing, but he had to hold back and laugh at the mouse's voice. Later, the partner with a runny nose may not be able to persist. "Ha ha ha ha, everyone hurriedly climbed down the ladder, who ran slowly was found by the groom, caught him embarrassed, scared to run around like a rabbit. It was really fun to think about that time, and several partners laughed happily when they talked together.

I remember going to college a few years ago and having a golden week holiday. Ma Ma called me and said, "Lele, when will you go home?" Mom will cook the best food for you. Mom misses you! " Don't mention how happy you are!

A few days after returning home, my mother began to scold: "I don't sleep like a cat at night, but I can't eat like a pig in the morning." I just know how to play mobile phone every day. I get tired of seeing you. Get out of school quickly! "

Well, just a few days after school started, my mother called me again and said, "Lele, when will you go home again?" Mom misses you! " "I ... . .

My mother has a good memory! Just now, I was tired of kicking me out, and I missed you in the blink of an eye. I, on the other hand, have an advantage, and I belong to that kind of night-high, especially when I have a few days off, and I feel like I was suddenly released after being locked up for a long time. So, every time I went home, my mother told me to go back, and I was scolded back to school in a few days! Is it funny?

This is my dear mother, a mother who loves and hates me! I have been a children's minister for a long time, and I miss her very much! I know my mother loves us, and maternal love in the world is equally great! Now that I'm working, my numbness is still the same as before. I was told to go back every holiday, and I was scolded to go back to work in a few days! We are growing up and have more white hair. The only thing that hasn't changed is the deep thoughts between family members!

When I was a child, I was naughty. I planted many plum trees, peach trees and banana trees at home. ...

I remember one winter, when I was bored and my parents went out to work, I climbed to the plum tree and sat watching my neighbor's third aunt dig the ground. I fell asleep in the tree unconsciously. I fell from the tree and hit the chestnut shell, which was softened by the rain. I just fell on my back, and I was stupid at that time. I thought I was dreaming of turning over. After not getting up for a few minutes, Third Aunt was frightened. She rushed to see me and asked me questions nervously. I looked at her with a puzzled face, touched my head and said nothing, just a little pain in my back. She helped me up and smiled when she saw my back. It turned out that I was wearing a thick cotton-padded coat, and my clothes were all chestnut shells, like countless little hedgehogs.

Finally, she spread the word, which embarrassed me. ?

1. I live in the country. When I was a child, my family raised several sheep. About the fourth grade of primary school, the ewe at home gave birth to a lamb, lively and lovely, and I like it very much. But on the first night after birth, the lamb "screamed" all night. The next day, after careful inspection, it was found that although the lamb was alive and kicking, it had no asshole, yes, no asshole. Asshole is smooth and elastic, without wool. Later, the veterinarian was called and there was nothing he could do after seeing it. Three days later, the lamb suffocated and died.

I had a dog at home when I was a child. Later, I gave birth to three puppies. After giving away two puppies, I kept one for myself. It happened that the puppy was stupid and ate its own shit. Later, his parents rejected him and sold him to a neighboring village. A week later, the buyer came to my house (there was no phone at that time, so he had to come in person) and said that the puppy bit the rope and ran away, and didn't come back to see it. About two or three days later, I found it when I was playing by the river. The puppy is very happy. It skips home with me. After a few days or so, it was sold again. A loyal puppy was sold twice and I was drunk.

In retrospect, it is still thrilling.

In college, my roommate and I made an appointment to have dinner together in the evening. Because in summer, I chose a barbecue stall close to school, fantasizing about blowing sea breeze, drinking beer, eating mutton kebabs and watching Xiaoman. This is life. To my delight, my roommate and I set off together and went to the barbecue stall. ......

The barbecue stall was disappointing. There are no small people, only the barbecue uncle in the sweatshirt. The undershirt seems to be unable to support his interesting soul, and the belly button is unscrupulously leaked out. None of this matters, and it still doesn't stop us from eating kebabs. ......

Drinking and eating meat can show a man's true temperament. There is a saying that "a mouthful of wine and a mouthful of meat are not free on earth". I don't remember how much I drank with my roommate, just one bottle. Pay the bill happily, wave, go and go home. Because it was Saturday night, I went back late and climbed the wall through the back door by the power of alcohol. After walking for about ten minutes, I don't know who said "I can't hold on any longer" and then jumped into the grass. In the evening, I began to leave big notes. Lu Xun said: "With the first one, there will be a second one." ...

We took advantage of the night and played a unique "concert" accompanied by insects. Just as we were having fun, a strong flashlight brought us back to reality. "What are those people doing!" The boss in the dormitory is the boss, and the response is quick. He put on his trousers and ran away. At this time, the spelling is speed. The vigorous figure of the boss shuttled through the Woods, and with the darkness, he couldn't tell whether it was a tree or the boss. ......

Just as we were chasing the boss, the boss suddenly disappeared from our sight and disappeared out of thin air. We didn't dare to stay long and returned to the dormitory with doubts in our hearts. When the boss came back, he fell asleep in bed without saying a word, and there was nothing to say all night. ......

The next day, the department issued a notice that five people in XXX dormitory violated the school rules, went out to drink, climbed over the wall into the school and urinated in the school park. One man accidentally fell into the water and was arrested by the security department of our school. Yes, it was captured. ......

Thank you for telling me something interesting that happened to me in high school.

When I was a sophomore, I sat in the class with several classmates. It was lunch break and there was no one in the classroom. We were particularly bored sitting there. A man suggested that we play cards. The loser really took a big risk, so he played! I think the game is very skillful and I can't lose. As a result, I lost the first prize, which was embarrassing ... I don't think anyone knows what I did now, so I chose a big adventure. They discussed it and asked me to shout three times in the corridor. I am a fool! Because of their urging, I ran to the corridor and shouted, "I am a fool." Just as I was about to shout for the second time, our head teacher came out of the office. She looked at me ... so embarrassed. I thought it was over and I was sure to be scolded. As a result, she called my classmate out of class in the afternoon and didn't know what to do. After a while, I heard a voice outside the classroom: I am a fool, I am a fool. ...

Sand sculpture roommates hang bananas outside, saying that it won't be bad to make bananas feel like they are still in the tree. ...

Because the toilet stinks, the sand sculpture roommate proposed to roll the dice to brush the toilet, starting with him and ending with him. ...

Roommate's key when going to the bathroom