Ten years of fighting between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, husband's fist refuels

For many years, her husband always beat her for various reasons, most of which were instigated by her in-laws. She believes that their family will be extremely happy if they don't live with their in-laws. So she has been fantasizing about the improvement of the relationship between husband and wife and enduring domestic violence. Now, she said, "I really can't stand it any longer."

When he entered the newspaper's "Love Studio", Xiao Liang kept covering his left face with his hand and said, "I was hit by a bicycle a few days ago." She said that after being hit on the way to work that night, her face was covered with blood, but she could not call her separated husband. She can only cry to her parents and company directors. "At that moment, I really felt too bitter and helpless, so I called you and wanted to talk to you." It was this collision that strengthened Xiao Jing's determination to divorce. "My husband failed to comfort me and help me when I was injured and helpless. What would such a husband do? "

The first wave of war

Why doesn't mother-in-law like to get off work late?

The consequences led to domestic violence in 10.

199 1, I'm playing at my neighbor's house in Bing Xu. His mother met me by chance and asked someone to introduce us. After dating for more than a year, we registered to get married at 1992. Supposedly, Bing Xu's mother has a crush on me, but what puzzles me is that during my love with Bing Xu, she has been lukewarm, and her attitude after marriage is unacceptable to me. Especially when giving birth to a child, I will never forget that grievance: bathing and dressing the child for 40 days after confinement. Besides cooking three meals for me, my in-laws don't want to take care of me. They haven't even cooked brown sugar or boiled eggs. I mentioned it to them at that time, but I didn't expect Bing Xu's mother to say, "Do you want to eat? Take the money and buy it yourself! " Later, I learned that Bing Xu's parents treated their daughter-in-law in this way, which led Bing Xu's eldest sister-in-law to leave home 40 days after giving birth.

1996, when my child was over one year old, I started to go out to work, and my parents-in-law took care of the child. I work as a shop assistant in a shopping mall. When I come home from the night shift every day, my mother-in-law nags in front of Bing Xu: "The doll is so small, do you still care if you play outside all day?" They won't listen to me 10 One night, just after work, my mother-in-law began to scold me again. Bing Xu drank some wine, scolded me a few words, and then beat me on the sofa. That was the first time I was defeated by Bing Xu.

In retrospect, it was that beating that started my 10 domestic violence. The cause of all this is precisely because of the provocation of my in-laws.

Pause the war.

Reasons for separation from in-laws.

The consequences of friends breaking up.

1998 because of the urban demolition, we were assigned to resettlement houses, so we were separated from our in-laws. My parents-in-law live in my sister's empty apartment in Bing Xu, just opposite our house. It should be said that from 1998 to 2003, although there were occasional bumps and quarrels, our family of three did have a good life for several years.

I was beaten by Bing Xu once in 2000 because a classmate lent me 20,000 yuan and didn't pay it back. Bing Xu forced me to go to my classmates to pay back the money, but my classmates didn't have it for the time being, so I didn't want to go. Bing Xu locked me at home, called another person and asked me for money. I cried on the phone and said, "Give it back, I'm going to be killed." That classmate was frightened and had to borrow money from usury, but he never dared to associate with our family. Similar things have happened several times, but we can all make up afterwards. Although Bing Xu has a bad temper and likes to hit people, I am always kind to him. The clothes and socks he usually goes out are all arranged by me and put on the bedside table; Even if he comes back in the afternoon 12, I will wait for him to have dinner together and bring him foot washing water.

In those years, we were loving and harmonious most of the time. Bing Xu is doing business outside to make money, while I am doing housework at work. My home is very harmonious and beautiful, and all the neighbors in the community envy us.

But mother-in-law's attitude and behavior still affect our lives from time to time. Because my mother-in-law is withdrawn, she doesn't associate with people and hates us making friends. An aunt in the village often chats with me because she has no children. One day, a neighbor told me, "Don't talk to that aunt. Your mother-in-law spits at her when she sees others." I just know that her mother-in-law will scold her for spitting every time she sees her, because she doesn't want us to associate, which makes her lonely aunt want to cry.

promote

The reason "instigates" children not to eat the meals cooked by their in-laws.

Consequence: The child wrote a note to sever the relationship between father and son.

In 2003, a brother and sister in Bing Xu had an argument about parental support. Bing Xu's sister wants to rent this empty room instead of letting her parents live in it; Eldest brother Bing Xu doesn't want to live with his parents. Knowing my mother-in-law's temper, I don't want to live with them either.

After a long struggle, one night, Bing Xu hugged me and wept bitterly, saying, "Please let my parents live with us. I didn't want to say yes, but the first time I saw him crying so sadly, my heart melted. The next day, I led people to move my in-laws' things into my house and made up my mind: "Never let people see jokes. I must have a good relationship with my in-laws and live a good life. " On the day my in-laws moved into my house, a neighbor asserted, "Within two years, Bing Xu and his wife will definitely divorce." I know they won't say such things for no reason. Even the eldest brother Bing Xu said, "My mother, whoever lives with her is unlucky."

Things were not as good as I expected, and problems soon appeared. Soon after my in-laws moved in, I went out to do business. After a while, I came home and suddenly found that my in-laws had hidden all my daily necessities, but I became an "outsider". The quarrels and fights between Bing Xu and me are becoming more and more frequent. Almost every time it is related to my in-laws, or they provoke each other.

In August 2004, I rented a house in the community and opened a mahjong room. Business is busy. One day at noon, Bing Xu suddenly called and said that I had instigated my children not to eat the meals cooked by grandparents and asked me to go back. I find it strange that I am too busy every day to go back and cook for my children. How can we teach children not to eat meals cooked by grandparents? So I refuted him on the phone and didn't go home. When I finished my work in the evening, I was kicked by Bing Xu as soon as I entered the house. At that time, the child was also frightened: the teenager actually wrote a note to Bing Xu to sever the relationship between father and son, packed his clothes and said, "I want to go outside with my mother, and I have no regrets at all." After listening to his words, I was wronged and wept bitterly.

It can be said that since my in-laws moved in, our family's life has become worse and out of control. Bing Xu always listens to his parents and then fights, but he ignores my explanation.

Extreme war

My mother-in-law and I quarreled about some clothes.

Make up your mind to divorce.

I didn't talk to Bing Xu from the quarrel in August 2004 to June 2005 at 5438+ 10. Later, I couldn't help it, so I went to my relatives' home in Bing Xu and cried. After numerous mediations and matchmaking by that relative, we finally made up.

On June 9th, 2005, Bing Xu invited my parents to dinner as a gesture of reconciliation. In the evening, Bing Xu and I cried bitterly. Bing Xu apologized to me. He said, do you know how I spent the past six months? It's all my mother's fault. I'm getting worse. In fact, when my in-laws didn't live with us, we quarreled for three days at most, but the cold war lasted for half a year. In addition to "saving face" for each other, in-laws played a great role in his "support". When a couple quarreled, their parents tried to persuade them, but they added fuel to the fire.

A few days later, my in-laws went to Chongqing to visit relatives, and we lived happily for another two months. Without my in-laws' "refueling", we can't quarrel, either he gives in or I make up. We even began to look forward to a happy life in the future, but two months later, when my mother-in-law came back, she gave me a scare: she didn't want me to cook, she wanted her to eat alone. The atmosphere at home became tense again.

Soon, Bing Xu's attitude gradually changed. He was lukewarm to me, even sarcastic. One morning in June, it rained heavily. I sent my children to cram school, fell down on the way, and went home soaked. Bing Xu was still sleeping in bed. I said, "Bing Xu, I fell. It hurts!" Unexpectedly, Bing Xu said angrily, "Go to hell, I don't want your body if you die." I'm so stupid, I don't know why. Later, if I came home late from work, if I made a noise, he would yell at me and even hit me with his fist. In order not to be beaten by him, I had to move to my son's room to sleep

In July 2005, my mother-in-law threw my clothes in the washing machine on the fence, and we had an argument. Bing Xu hit me indiscriminately again, attracting dozens of people from the community to watch. Until 1 10, he put me down and ran away. I was beaten unconscious and carried out of the storage room by others. I couldn't take it anymore, so I filed for divorce in August. But later, he had to give up the lawsuit because Bing Xu had transferred all his family savings. He said, "If you want a divorce, you and the doll won't get a penny."

Although the lawsuit was dropped, the "separation" of the family was a foregone conclusion. In Bing Xu, I cook with my parents. I don't go home. They don't cook for my children. If I cook in the kitchen, my mother-in-law will find all kinds of reasons to stop it. After a while, she said that the stove was confiscated. After a while, she said not to pile the bowls in the pool. My children and I have to eat instant noodles or simply cook some jiaozi. He has no feelings for me. Does he have no feelings for his son? In recent years, we have been making noise. He never bought clothes for his children, nor did he give a penny. I have nothing to say about such a person.

This year, I filed a divorce lawsuit with the court again, determined to divorce and fight for the rights of my children and me. In fact, I have been planning to endure it, dreaming of waiting for myself to get better, but now I really can't bear it anymore.

Be a good mediator in the war between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law

In fact, in the story Xiao Liang told reporters, she suffered more violence than what was written in the article. In addition to accusing her husband of being "bloodless" and suspicious, she also blamed her in-laws for the end of the marriage: "I dare say that if we didn't live with our in-laws, we wouldn't be here today."

But in love or marriage, besides the influence of family and friends, the more fundamental factor is the lovers of both sides. In getting along with in-laws, not only the daughter-in-law needs to actively improve the relationship, but also the husband's "mediation". This kind of "mediation" is an art. It is obviously unwise to roughly accuse or even beat his wife on the grounds of "filial piety", and it may even become the cheering voice of the "mother-in-law-daughter war", adding fuel to the fire.

When evaluating her husband's performance, Xiao Liang said, "He is only filial and listens to his mother, but in the end he must have nothing, no love, no affection!" "Advise all men in the world to trust your wives and adjust the relationship between parents and wives." As a victim, this statement is really thought-provoking.

Think deeply, including husbands, wives and their parents all over the world.