Looking for short and incisive SMS jokes

If the work is boring, flip a coin, chat on the internet, sleep on your back, stand upright at work and lean hard. If it breaks down, apply for overtime. If you break two pieces, you fall every day! On the plane, a passenger asked his neighbor, what did the captain say just now? Neighbor replied: the captain said Las Vegas is coming, please fasten your wallet. There is a sign beside the highway of Swiss Immigration Bureau, which reads: "Please pay more attention to drivers. At present, doctors and funeral home staff are on vacation. " A wife will tell a man how much vegetables cost a catty, and a lover will tell him how many stars there are in the night sky. Honeymoon-a suspended sentence before the "wife" sentence. Because money is treated like dirt, flowers are always inserted in cow dung. The hen was hatching eggs when suddenly an egg came out by itself. The hen said, "What are you doing?"

Egg: "You fart, it stinks …" There is a hide-and-seek club, and the person in charge hasn't been found yet.

There is a man who looks like an onion, crying as he walks.

On a hot afternoon, a match tickled, scratched and caught fire.

Why don't you say hello to the rare steak? Because they don't know each other.

On a hot summer day, two bananas were walking on the road. The banana walking in front suddenly felt so hot. He said it was too hot. I want to take off my clothes. As a result, he skinned it. As a result, the banana in the back fell down.

Once upon a time, a steamed stuffed bun walked on the road and felt hungry, so it ate itself. Once upon a time, there was a loaf of bread walking in the street. He felt hungry and ate himself. Once upon a time, there was a marshmallow who went to play ball for a long time. He said, "I'm so tired. I feel that I am soft. "

Once upon a time, there was a bird. He passed a cornfield every day, but one day the cornfield caught fire and all the corn turned into popcorn! After the bird flew by ... it thought it was snowing, so it was very cold.

Xiaoming got a new haircut and came to school the next day. The students all laughed when they saw his new hairstyle: Xiao Ming, your head looks like a kite! Xiao Ming felt very wronged, so he ran outside crying and flew away.

The fish said, "I kept my eyes open to leave you." The water said, "I have been flowing tirelessly all day and want to hug you." The pot said, "I'm so stubborn when I'm fucking ripe."

Xiao Bai looks like his brother. Do you know why? Because: it's really like Dabai.

A polar bear stayed alone on the ice in a daze. When he was really bored, he began to pull out his hair.

Draw a v on two fingers. What is this? Yeah! Hands are shaking, reach down. What is this? It's fallen leaves!

Hold out four fingers. What is it? Fourth, bend four fingers. What is this? Wonderful! (bend four)

Wolf, tiger and lion, who will be eliminated when playing games? Wolf because: Momotaro (eliminated the wolf).

Once upon a time, there was a lamb. One day, he went out to play and met a wolf. The wolf said, "I will eat you!" " "Guess what? As a result, the wolf ate the lamb.

One day, three little pigs built three huts to avoid being chased by wolves. Wolves easily destroyed straw houses, wooden houses and brick houses. Three little pigs ran as fast as they could, but the wolf caught up with them. The three little pigs said in despair, it's up to you. We gave up, whatever you wanted. At this time, the wolf grinned and drooled and said, "Then tell me where Little Red Riding Hood is?"