Quotations from the post-80s talk show tonight.

1, as long as you are willing to open skills and mix, there is no immortal paladin.

Wang Jianguo: I was bitten by a dog. Can I be a dog? You have rabies.

3. Fat Wang Jianguo, Lai Bao and Maruko.

4. Look at the film you made. Of course, it's a good movie. All the failures in it should be your personal experience.

A successful woman will make her husband feel insecure forever.

6, the three customs will always live in the hearts of the three vulgar people.

7. I'm here. What else can happen at home?

8, the four men of leather shoes-gelatin, milk, jelly, capsules.

9. I haven't starved to death or beaten a professor for more than six years; The walls of Beijing have not been torn down.

10, take out a cigarette and shout at the volcano, light it for me.

1 1. At the airport, someone asked me, buddy, do you have a lighter? I said yes, here you are. Oh, it's disposable. I have zippo, too

Spider-Man is like Qian Qian? Diaosi can only live in the city, not in the countryside at all, and there are more opportunities in the city.

13. Try there is a place I really want to take you. It has beautiful lighting, a very good atmosphere and a box. Most importantly, it will be a little exciting if we go together.

14, since the first day of stock trading, my qualifications have declined. Who asked me how the stock was: down.

15, the goddess said: my piano 10, clarinet 6, English 8. What's your specialty? Wang Jianguo thought for a long time: I am level 60 in World of Warcraft.

16, hello everyone, come to class today. I don't talk about fashion today, but I want to talk about love today.

17, I met a taxi driver and robbed him: Te2 Youth: You can do anything, can you stop the meter first?

18, office workers are very hard, and the salary is a monthly salary, but the workload does not include traffic.

19, it is very popular recently that "having money is willful" is simply nonsense. Think about it, we were all willful when we were young. We are all poor, and we are still poor. Since I have known money since I was a child, I am no longer willful, because I only know money.

20. Every time the subway runs, several people get off. I decided to take a cactus to work, and then I got off the subway and saw how aloe vera was.

2 1, everyone has always loved to be a civil servant. In ancient times, it was relatively simple, just cut it with one knife.

22. Girls in their twenties now marry old men in their forties and fifties. What should we do? We will wait until we are 40 or 50 years old before marrying people in their twenties.

Everyone has advantages in his work, but everyone hates being called a leader.

24. What the weak say is an excuse. Everything is luck, which is the humility of the strong.

25. The phrase "money is willful" is very popular recently, which is simply nonsense. Think about it, we were all willful when we were young. We are all poor, and we are still poor. Since I have known money since I was a child, I am no longer willful, because I only know money.

26, earn money to sell cabbage, with the heart of selling * *.

27. I have no credibility. I know. I am the stomach of a bird. Do you think I have lost weight recently?

28. Losers in love have gone too far. What do you mean by pure price? Who said I failed in love? Where did I fail?

29. God, I'm ready to go to the Kung Fu world, aren't I? You have no idea how painful this punch is! Sister Hold: No, I am so gentle.

30. Let's talk about the significance of Lu Xun. In fact, people just want to earn some money to eat noodles.

3 1. Those who don't help others when they see them fall will definitely have no help in the future.

Dear earthquake volcano is not terrible as long as you are around, because you are even more terrible.

33. Just like F 1 1, you are always there, but you just don't know what to do. You can call me F4.

34. Let's not talk about acting, but the single life is very sad. Gao Shuai is as rich and powerful as we are. He is rich, eloquent, knowledgeable and talented.

35. The people have no special requirements. We just want to live like employees of state-owned enterprises.

36. I have always said that jokes are a loser's game. There are beautiful women to see, who will listen to jokes! Who can tell jokes when there are beautiful women to see!

37. With such a lighter, you still expect others to borrow it.

38. When the book is used, you won't be so annoying. Put your feet down if you don't put the insole on.

39. The star will make a guest appearance, and you will play a walk-on.

40. My wife always asks me: Is there always a piece of clothing missing from my husband's closet? Yes, you always buy skirts.

4 1, setting off firecrackers is to drive away the fear of the future, such as setting off firecrackers when getting married.

42. Stop, stop, and return the bird's stomach. Who is the man who just had four lunches backstage?

43. Crosstalk is divided into disc version and gun version. We have a gun version because we have laughter here.

44. Another aftershock occurred in Japan. This time, there were no casualties. What does this mean? This shows that the sequel is not as good as the first episode.

45. There are boyfriend and girlfriend for rent online now. How do parents distinguish between true and false boyfriends and girlfriends? Ask him at the dinner table, didn't our child's infectious disease pass to you? Say nothing is false, jump is true.

46. My nose is stuffy and I can't hear clearly.

47, forget it, I tell you, this is wrong in short, the key is that your film only teaches female bachelors how to fall in love.