Horror jokes, humor lists, humor, you know?

When I was young, my mother was very strict with me. Once, because I made a mistake, my mother pointed a pencil sharpener at my ass and said I was going to cut meat, which made me cry. Although it was just a scare, my mother's majesty spread …

So later, in the horror story grandma told her brothers and sisters, mom replaced the monster with the protagonist.

Therefore, my brothers and sisters are in awe of my mother.

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Once, grandma was crying for her sister, and all means failed. She whispered in her sister's ear: Your second aunt (my mother) is here!

My sister suddenly fell asleep crying …

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My brother doesn't like taking a bath, and my uncle and aunt won't listen to anything.

When my brother came to see me, my mother said, come on, we all wear black collars around our necks …

My brother went home and said to his aunt, mom, boil water for me quickly. I need to take a shower!

Aunt's face is black: have you met your second aunt again?

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Will my brother run away or will he cling to someone and hold him? Once I let my grandmother hold me in the sun in the street, and suddenly I was very nervous: Grandma, let me down!

Grandma: Little ancestor, what's the matter again? !

Brother: My second aunt is here!

Mom's moderns.

It's freezing now, and I still remember the cold winter of that year. I prayed repeatedly that my girlfriend who had been in love for half a year could stay for the night and promised to give her a hug, but she didn't enter her body. I gave her thermal underwear to wear as pajamas and told her: this underwear is too tight, even if I feel sexy, you can't help it if you have to protect me.

Petite, she is very cute in clothes a few sizes larger. I swam around with my hands and said, "Through my clothes, I can always ... get acquiescence, so I snickered." ...

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The next morning, my girlfriend screamed and complained: I didn't expect that there was a door on TMD men's underwear. ......

The first time is always unforgettable. ......

I have a roommate named Xiao Cangnan. After work in the evening, I often go to play ball with my colleagues. He seldom plays ball. He will go running in Jiang Bin. Ask him why, and his theory is: "The players are all pure men. If you go running by the river, you will meet beautiful MM. "

It turned out that he did meet a beautiful mm, but he didn't have a chance to strike up a conversation. Once, a little Teddy dog was tied to the toilet by the river. Xiao Cangnan thought it was a play, and quickly squatted down to tease the puppy, thinking that mm would come out soon. He said that your dog is really cute.