The great gods helped the jokes in Han Fuju.

He knows how to arrange poems, usually limericks. You can find that there are not many paragraphs written by him when you search ... [Han Fuju writes poems] Warlord Han Fuju often jokes when he is happy to be the chairman of Shandong Province. At one time, the land of Qilu thundered, and Han Fu was full of poetry. Then he sang "Singing Lightning": Suddenly I saw a fire on the horizon. Is the Jade Emperor smoking? If the Jade Emperor doesn't smoke, why is there a flash of lightning on the horizon? One day, my colleague accompanied Han Fuju to visit places of interest in Jinan. First, I visited Daming Lake, in which Liu wrote an inscription: Lotus flowers on all sides and willow on three sides; A city with mountains and half a city with lakes. Colleagues spoke highly of this couplet and calligraphy. Han Fuju thinks that his colleagues deliberately make fun of him as a lout. So, he said to his colleagues, "Daming Lake is the time when spring blooms and the water is clear and toads bark. Such a beautiful scenery should be entertained by poetry. " Colleagues quickly echoed: "Yes, yes, please ask President Han to write poems. We are all ears. " Han Fuju looked smug, shook his head and wrote a poem: Daming Lake, Daming Lake is big, Daming Lake has lotus flowers; Toad is lying on the lotus leaf, cooing. Colleagues laughed: "Chairman is a talented poet, a good poem, a good poem." From Daming Lake, I went to Baotu Spring. There is a poetess Li Qingzhao Temple near Baotu Spring, which has a strong cultural atmosphere. Han Fuju asked, "What does this woman do?" An attendant replied, "She was a poetess in the Southern Song Dynasty." Facing Baotu Spring, Han Fuju Yaxing Dafa is "just a poet and lyricist!" Another song: Baotu Spring, a sudden spring, a three-eyed strong spring; Glug, glug. After the recitation, colleagues all gave thumbs up: "Good poem, good poem, chairman, hurry." Finally, I visited Qianfo Mountain. After the tour, it was dusk. On the way down the mountain, a colleague suggested: "President Han visited three famous places in Jinan today. Daming Lake and Baotu Spring both made poems as a memorial. Qianfo Mountain is a famous mountain. It would be a pity if there were no poems! " After hearing this, Lao Han turned his head and looked at Qianfo Mountain, holding his chest in his hands, full of poetry and painting, and took a poem to write down. The poem says: from a distance, Foshan is black and thick, with fine top and thick bottom; One day it will be turned upside down, and the details will be thick. Han Fuju wrote three poems every day, and in a few days it spread all over the spring city of Jinan, becoming a joke all over the street. Han Fuju tried the case. After Han Fuju ruled Shandong, he had his own characteristics in judicature. In judicial institutions, he basically established a set of institutions stipulated by the Kuomintang, and his personal handling of cases was unique, which was one of the outstanding characteristics of Han Fuju. Han Fuju always talks nonsense when trying a case. Once, he questioned the case of a chicken thief and a cattle thief. It is said that stealing chickens and cows is no big deal, and it can be solved by fines, stick blame or labor. Whoever steals chickens is lighter and those who steal cows are heavier. He said to the chicken thief, "How dare you. When the chicken is caught, it quacks. If you dare to steal, what do you dare to do? " Damn it, shoot! "He also said to the cattle thief," You can steal cattle as long as it is quiet. You are not guilty. Forget it! "1935, Han fuju inspected Linyi county and interrogated two cases of vendetta. Surnamed tang's family was killed by the Wangs on 1925. 1930, the Tang family took revenge and killed seven members of the Wang family. After learning something, Han asked Tang Jia, "How many people are there in your family?" Tang Jia replied, "There are 1 1 people, the old ones are 84 years old, and the young ones are 12 years old. "Without thinking, Han Fuju said," Take all the 1 1 mouths of surnamed tang people and shoot them. " Linyi county magistrate interjected: "The Wangs have also killed people. "Han Fuju said:" I didn't come to be the chairman in the Republic of China 14, and I don't care if the Wangs kill people; "In the Republic of China 19, I became the chairman of Shandong Province, and Tang Jiagan killed people indiscriminately, but it was useless. Don't talk much! " Scared the county magistrate into silence. Senator Zhang Liansheng, who was patrolling with Han Fuju at that time, said, "Please let this 80-year-old man go." Han said, "If you stay, you will cry to death. It is better to kill them all. " He killed 1 1 in surnamed tang, but the Wangs were safe. Han Fuju expands the army] Han Fuju has set a strict working schedule for his civil servants. Provincial government agencies get up at 5: 30 am (earlier in summer) and turn off the lights at 9 pm. In addition to working in the morning and afternoon, there will be morning meetings and regular newspaper reading in the afternoon. Opening a court session is one of the most obvious characteristics of Shandong civil servants' working life. Han Fuju advocated force, especially after he ruled Shandong. Expand the army desperately and train strictly. Therefore, during the period of Lu's rule, the military strength got unprecedented development. However, in order to weaken the warlords and strengthen their rule, Chiang Kai-shek ordered the army to reduce its establishment. If this is done, the Korean Army will have only three divisions, 18 regiment, and two regiments of the pistol brigade, there will always be 20 regiments with more than 40,000 people. In other words, the Korean army will cut 20 regiments. Han fuju, who is eager to expand the army, will not be content. Therefore, under the pretext of "too many redundant staff", please allow Qiao Lizhi to keep the 74th Division. In addition, the new division has no artillery regiment, and he asked to keep the original three artillery regiments. It is called downsizing, but the number of people has not changed much. Han Fuju is very strict with military discipline. Soldiers are more demanding on the streets. They must be led by officers and assistants, March in neat rows, and sing songs such as "Man Jiang Hong", "Su Wu Shepherd" and "National Salvation March" at a pace. On September 5th, 1930, Han Fuju, a rebellious hero, was appointed as the chairman of Shandong Province and officially became a local tyrant. During his reign, he often went out for unannounced visits, sometimes with a few followers, and sometimes imitated the "governor's adult" for private visits, leaving many anecdotes. One day, just before dawn, Han Fuju rode a bicycle in rags, like a messenger. Suddenly, a pedestrian came in a hurry and knocked down Han Fuju's car. Han Fuju got stuck in the mire, and his clothes and shoes were dirty. Han Fuju was furious, got up and grabbed the man and said, "Don't you have long eyes? Hit the car! My clothes are dirty, you have to pay for it! " Who knows that the man ignored it and tried to escape in a hurry. Han Fuju was even more angry and asked, "Who are you, so unreasonable?" The man said, "How much can your clothes be worth? It's not that I'm stingy, I'm really in a hurry. " Han Fuju asked, "What's your emergency?" The man replied, "I have something to do with the finance department." Han Fuju asked again, "Who are you?" The man said, "I'm a clerk in the finance department." President Han called a meeting today, and it's time. How dare you delay for a minute? "Then he told his address and said," If you come to my house at night, I will definitely pay for your clothes. I have no time to argue with you now. "Say that finish, he broke free and ran away. Han Fuju looked at his back and stood for a long time, thinking that this person was so serious about attending the meeting, and his spirit was commendable. The next day, Han Fuju summoned Wang Xiangrong, the chief financial officer, and asked if there was such a person in the finance department. Wang Xiangrong thought for a moment and said, "I remember there was such a person. He copied it as a clerk. " He turned to Han Fuju and asked, "Why does the Chairman know him? "Han Fuju said," Don't ask more questions. If there is a vacancy in the staff, you can promote him. "When Wang Xiangrong returned home, he thought that this person must be inextricably linked with the chairman, so he promoted him immediately before the clerk position became vacant. Once, a farmer pushed a cart of pottery into the city, but he was knocked down by Han Fuju, who was riding a bicycle for a private visit. The pottery on the cart was scattered all over the floor. These crockery are the lifeblood of the poor, so the farmer stamped his foot painfully as if he were going to cry. Han Fuju saw it, took out a business card and said to him, "Don't worry, you go to the front yamen and give this business card to the guard on guard. He will help you find me and I will return it to you." Say that finish, he first rode back to the provincial government. The farmer had no choice but to follow Han Fuju's advice and push the car outside the provincial capital. When the guard saw Chairman Han's business card, he asked the monitor to ask Han Fuju for instructions. At the same time, Han Fuju invited farmers to meet him. At the same time, he asked people to wear plain clothes and weighed two Jin of candy in a candy store. Han Fuju learned in a private visit that candy store owners are mercenary and often short of Jin and Liang. After the candy was bought back, Han Fuju was weighed, and sure enough, half a catty was missing. Han Fuju immediately ordered the shopkeeper to come over and reprimand him: "Selling candy short scales will be fined 50 yuan, and you are not allowed to weigh short scales again! "The shopkeeper had no choice but to hand over 50 yuan's money. So Han Fuju transferred the 50 yuan money and candy to the farmers as compensation. The farmer left after a thousand thanks. Suddenly, lightning flashed in the sky. Maybe the fairy wants to smoke. If there is no smoke, why is it on fire? Looking at Mount Tai from a distance, it was dark. Fine on the top and thick on the bottom. One day, it was upside down. It's very thick on it. Daming Lake, Daming Lake, Daming Lake, there is a lotus with a toad poking, jumping into Baotu Spring, the spring is as thick as three eyes, gurgling. Not my little Sean. Grandma has gone back to Pei County. Han Fuqu's speech: Ladies and gentlemen, everywhere: What's the weather like today? Today is a good day for a speech. The guests are very prosperous, and I really caught a cold. There are quite a few people here today, it seems to be about 8/5. Don't say anything if you come, raise your hand if you don't! Good, everyone is here! Today, my brother called everyone to a training camp. If my brother says something wrong, we should forgive each other. You are cultural people, all college students, middle school students and international students. You rabble are scientific, and you know English in seven or eight countries. Dude, I'm a lout. I don't even know English in China. You all climbed out of the fence, and I climbed out of the barrel of a gun. Speaking here today really makes me feel proud and grateful. Actually, I'm not qualified to talk to you. It's like casting pearls before swine, which can be said to stand out from the crowd. Not much to say today, let's start with three outlines. I support the Grand Marshal's new life movement, brother. Just one, pedestrians walk on the right, which is really inappropriate. Think about it. Pedestrians walk on the right. Who will leave the left wing? One more thing, man, I can't figure it out. Foreigners set up embassies in Dongjiaominxiang, and we are short of China. Why don't we build an embassy in China? After all, China people are too weak. The third program, the student basketball match, must be the corruption of the general affairs director. Why is that school so bad? What does it feel like for a dozen people to grab a ball in their underwear? How ugly. Come to my mansion tomorrow to collect some money, buy more balls, and give one to everyone, so as not to argue again. There are no outsiders and no bad guys here today, so I want to tell you three secrets: the first secret can't be told to you for the time being, the second secret is the same as the first one, and the first two points of the third secret have already been mentioned. Today's speech is over, thank you! Follow-up: Who can I give this to if I don't give it to you? Unexpectedly, your only answer is boutique. Answer: Thank you, man.

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