Local folk songs, ballads and jokes

A group of ants saw a big pear and began to discuss with the names of some countries.

Ant A: "Hey, big pear (Italy)?" Ant B: "Shh, pear (Syria)." Ant C said, "Oh, big pear (Australia)." Ant D said, "Hey, move (Spain)."

As a result, the ants couldn't move, and they began to discuss again.

Ant A has an idea: "Eat a pear (Kenya)." Ant B: "Hug at home (Bulgaria)." Ant C took a bite and said, "The pear is not tender (Lebanon)." Ant D also took a bite and said, "A pear (Israel)."

In a speech in a poor area, the new county magistrate and the host spoke with a strong Sichuan accent.

Moderator: "Kimchi, please talk to pickles!" " (Now please speak to the county magistrate! )

County magistrate: "Rabbit, shrimp! This year's meals have been given to dogs, and everyone is chinemys reevesii! " (Comrades, folks! We have eaten enough this year, so let's make a big bowl! )

What is the secret of success?

"Blow hard!" The wind said.

"Can shoot!" The camera said.

"Cover it," said the mosquito net.

"Everywhere," said the nail.

"Watch your mouth." The knife said.

"The capacity should be large." The refrigerator said.

"Always stay calm." The air conditioner said.

"I have the ability to sweep away darkness and bring light." Fire said.

"Don't be led by the nose." Said the teapot.

The rabbit said, I am a son of a bitch.

The pig said: I am a pig bastard.

The chicken said, I am a son of a bitch.

The dog said: you talk, I'll go first.

The cat said to me, I am your grandmother's cat. Listen.

The dog said to me: I am your grandmother's dog, which sounds good.

The fish said to me: I am your grandmother's fish, and it is also very beautiful.

The bear said: you talk, I'll go first.

Lang Ke said: People call me a ronin, which is good.

The samurai said, it's nice to be called a samurai.

The expert said: It's nice to be called an expert.

The swordsman said: you talk, I'll go first.

Peking University said: I am from Peking University.

Tianjin University said: I am older.

Shanghai University said: I went to college.

Xiamen University said: You talk, I'll go first.

General Li Zongren said: I am a benevolent man!

General fu said to him: I am just!

General Zuo Quan said: I have this right!

General Huo Qubing said: You talk, I'll go first.

Minolta users say: we are beautiful women!

Canon users say: we are beautiful!

The user of Huaguang said: We are from China!

Nikon users said: you chat, I'll go first.

The door of Lao Zhang's house is made of wicker. Lao Zhang said: My door is a wooden door.

Lao Li's door is made of plastic. Lao Li said that my door is made of plastic.

The door of Lao Wang's house is made of brick. Lao Wang said: My door is a brick door.

The door of the Liu family is made of steel. Liu said, you chat, I walked first.

Beijing crane factory said: I hung it in the north.

Guangzhou crane factory said: I hang wide.

Chongqing crane factory said: I hung again.

Tianjin crane factory said: I hung myself from the sky.

Shanghai crane factory said: you talk, I'll go first.

Guangzhou Institute of Education said that I am a widely educated person.

Zhaoqing Institute of Education says I am Zhao Jiao.

Shaoguan Institute of Education said I was Miss Shao.

Foshan Institute of Education said: You talk, I'll go first.

The Wangs said, outsiders call me Wang Wu, which is nice.

Lao Liu of the Wangs said that it's good to be called Liu Wang by outsiders.

The old seven of the Wangs said it's good to be called Wang Qi by outsiders.

The Wangs old eight said: You talk, I'll go first.

Kitten said: everyone in the village calls me kitten, which is nice.

The calf said, it's good for the villagers to call me calf.

Pony said: everyone in the village calls me Pony Boy, which is also very nice.

Rabbit said: you talk, I'll go first. ...