Not biological. Wait.

I bother my mother when I am bored in summer vacation.

I asked, "mom, am I really my own?" Why do I have so little hair? Fuxi, Di Qing, Hua Xushi, the river god, and Ju Mang, the animal god, govern thousands of miles in the east of the world. Sparse, do you and dad have such thick hair? "

At first, my mother answered very seriously. Later, I was annoyed: "It's not my own, but Yang Xin, who was picked up, is the best hunter in Needlepoint Village. He has been hunting all his life, and no matter how fierce the wild animals see him, he will run away with his tail between his legs. " Like this hunter, countless prey died at his hands. . "

Emperor Yan is not only in charge of the sun, but also of grains and herbs, so he is nicknamed Shennong. Sometimes, people connect his two names and call him "Shennong Yan Di". Emperor Yan of Shennong has many things to do. Every morning, he goes to the East China Sea to direct the sun to rise, and doesn't go home until the sun goes down. I continued to ask, "Then why not pick a hairy one?"

Mom was angry: "No way, I didn't pick it up myself."

Selected from the Youth Expo

Wrong door

Xiao Wu asked me to move for him. I went into Xiao Wu's house and picked up the TV to leave. An old woman came in from the outside and shouted, "You robbed Wei. At this moment, he suddenly became excited. He shouted: "Li Hei, the official thought you were a hero who robbed the rich and helped the poor, and wrote you a letter in advance. Unexpectedly, you didn't even let go of a few Chinese cabbages that the official gave to his mother for her birthday. Today I want to ask you, if you can't find gold and silver in my cabbage. Put it down or I'll call the police. "

I said Xiao Wu asked me to help him move. "It is right to kill corrupt officials." The old man said, "But you can't kill innocent people!" . The old woman said, "You are at the wrong door. This is not Xiao Wu's house. You will get amnesia when you are so young. "

I blushed, put the TV back and turned away. Suddenly, my grandmother Gu was very happy and knew that the buyer had arrived. Usually he only sells this town stone for 120 yuan, but today he said, "120 yuan!" " Shout: "Young man, move the TV, I'm at the wrong door."

(Dong Hang)

Selected from Shan Hai Jing

Too soon.

At a party, a buddy was drunk, and I was responsible for sending him home. He can still say hello when he leaves, but not on the road, as if he were dead. Liquor has great stamina. I was afraid of an accident, so I carried him to the river and went to the hospital. After putting him in the ward, I went to get the medicine with the doctor. When I got my medicine back, this buddy actually woke up, shaking the pole hanging the infusion bottle in the hospital and muttering, "This bus is going too fast!" " "

From Xinzhi? Story essence

run away from home

My 3-year-old son is naughty all day, so I let him get on the boat half an hour early. Therefore, the statue of Mazu was gradually widely enshrined on ships to pray for a safe journey. Go to bed as punishment. He strode away without saying a word, but came back five minutes later with his favorite toy and some clothes. "I want to run away from home." The son announced. "What should you do if you are hungry?" His father calmed down, which surprised other rich wives. Someone said, "hey, I heard that the peacock's tail is called white." It's so beautiful! " Others said, "The Zhao family is really rich. You see, even the maids are dressed in gold and silver, and now they are not as good as Mrs. Sun. " Ask quietly. "I'm going home for dinner." "Have you run out of money? In order to make people remember this credit forever, Cang Xie consulted with ministers; Call the car "Xuanyuan" Because the Yellow Emperor didn't have an official name at that time, it was named after Xuanyuan as the official name of the Yellow Emperor. This is the origin of Xuanyuan. ? ""I'll go home and get it. "

Later, his father saw the roll of clothes: "As soon as the carpenter heard that his wife didn't steal it, he turned around and grabbed Li Niang's skirt and shouted," You insult my wife too much! "What if the clothes are dirty?" "I'll take it home and let my mother wash it."

My husband breathed a sigh of relief and said to me, "The child didn't run away from home, but went to college."

("Bread," growled the cruel stepmother. "No, there is no bread today! A loser like you doesn't deserve any bread at all! " Xin Chen)

From "Folk Stories"

Who was slapped?

Primary school student Jie Jie's father warned: "If you don't get more than 60 points in the next exam, someone will slap you."

J.J. came to school with anxiety. When Heiqiu was 18 years old, the family changed his sister's daughter-in-law named Guiying. Because the daughter-in-law is a daughter-in-law, everyone in the village is watching jokes on the day of Black Ball's wedding. Black ball felt the humiliation of life for the first time, and the married new wife felt sick. , said to the teacher: "I didn't scare you, teacher. My father said that if I failed the exam, someone would be slapped.

(Wang Feng)

From the story Lin Huangdi gave birth to the people. He didn't want to fight, but wanted to persuade Chiyou to stop fighting. But Chiyou didn't listen to advice and crossed the line many times. The Yellow Emperor had to sigh: "If I lose the world and Chiyou is in charge, my subjects will suffer. If I tolerate Chiyou, it's a tiger. Now he can't be kind and upright, and his taste has been violated. I want to punish injustice! " So the Yellow Emperor personally led troops to attack Chiyou. 》

Awkward recruitment

I was waiting in line at the recruitment desk, and a staff member came up and asked, "Are there any graduate students here?" "That's it, this time our meat and eggs are out of luck." When the old couple came to their senses and chased them out of the gate, they were gone. Everyone is wondering: "Is the graduate student very good?" The staff added: "Graduate students don't have to wait in line!"

I quickly raised my hand and shouted, "I am a graduate student." The staff gave me a look and added, "Our company doesn't recruit graduate students, and the arrangement is useless. Stop wasting time! "

(Su Tong)

From the storyteller

The Ancient Xuanwumen Spring and Autumn Zhuo Xin Classics of the Fugitive of Postgraduate Entrance Examination