There is a kind of lack of money, called "your child thinks you are short of money"

My son Xianger turned 0/8 years old a few days ago and began to enter the adult world.

His father and I agreed to divorce when he was ten years old because of our incompatible personalities.

Because his father refused to give me custody of my children. At that time, my unit's wage income was also low. Considering that the child will be more affluent economically with his father, it can give him a better living and educational environment. So even if I can't bear to part with 10 thousand, I will give up his custody after weighing the pros and cons.

Xianger's birthday happens to be on the third day of the first month. His parents, grandparents and their whole family celebrated Xianger's birthday, so it's not convenient for me to attend and disturb him. So I made an appointment with Xianger in advance, took him out in a couple of days and invited him to dinner and a movie.

Then I transferred him 520 yuan on WeChat as a birthday greeting red envelope. And attach a sentence: Keep growing, and your heart will always be eighteen.

But Xianger didn't receive it. Please reply to me: There is no need to send so many. .

I replied: please accept my mother's heart.

But the next day, I still received a short message of overdue refund notice from WeChat payment center.

I once again deeply realized that my son thought I was short of money.

Let me ask you a question. Do you think you are short of money?

I think most people will answer, no.

My answer is the same.

Everyone says they are short of money. But the degree of lack is different, and the reasons for lack are also different.

Migrant workers will say: I lack a few hundred dollars to buy a scooter to push bricks; The working class will say: I lack tens of thousands of dollars to buy a car to go to work; The boss who does business will say: I lack millions of funds to start the project; Multi-millionaires will say: I lack hundreds of millions of investments …

Everyone may feel that they are short of money.

The other is lack of money, that is, I feel that I am short of money. Lack of money is because others think you are short of money.

It's like there is a kind of cold, and you feel cold yourself. There is also a kind of coldness called "Your mother thinks you are cold".

So what I want to say today is that for me, besides feeling short of money, there is also a kind of lack of money called "my son thinks I am short of money"

In fact, Xianger thinks that my mother is short of money, not only recently, but also after I divorced her father. But because he is very young.

When I was three years old, I washed clothes, and he wanted to help me wash them. So, I took a little dress of his own and washed it for him. He rubbed as hard as I did, and the patterns dyed on his clothes were blurred. He burst into tears at once. He said, mom, I'm sorry. I washed my clothes badly. I said nothing, mom will buy it for you. He said it would cost money to buy it again. I don't want my mother to spend any more money.

At such a young age, my son began to worry that I was short of money when other children had no concept of money.

In primary school, I accompanied my niece to learn paper-cutting at home on weekends. I bought them a bottle of glue. As a result, my niece accidentally knocked over the glue. Xianger immediately scolded her sister. He said, why are you so careless? My mother bought two yuan of glue, two yuan. My niece, who has never been yelled at by him, almost burst into tears.

Once I took my brother and sister to the street. Because it was hot, I was afraid that they were thirsty, so I said, buy a bottle of mineral water for each of you. As a result, Xianger said, mom doesn't have to buy two bottles, just one bottle, and I'll drink it with my sister.

In the eyes of us adults, one yuan and two pieces are nothing at all. But in your eyes, you can save your mother a dollar if you spend less than a dollar.

For a while, my colleagues always dragged me to play mahjong. Every time I look at playing cards, Xianger seems very reluctant. Or tell me not to call and say, mom, I'm afraid you'll lose money. If he can't convince me, he will stand next to me and watch nervously. After a while, I asked, mom, did you lose money?

For me, I don't care about losing hundreds of dollars in a game. But Xiang Er will be heartbroken. So every time I want to get rid of him, I always say to him at the back: Don't worry, mom didn't lose money.

Before the divorce, although there was no quarrel in front of each other, it was mostly a cold war. But Xiang Er is very attentive. He felt the discord between his parents very early.

When I was about seven years old, one day, I asked him if he was happy at school. He said he was very happy. Then suddenly asked me, mom, are you happy? I paused and asked him, do you think mom is happy? He said, mom, I don't think you are happy. If you are not satisfied with your father, you can leave him!

At that moment, I suddenly realized that the most important thing for him is not that I must be with his father, but that I want to be a happy mother.

After the divorce, once he knew that I was in sales, he even said to me, Mom, you must work hard to earn more money than Dad, or he will laugh at you.

In his mind, he is afraid that I will be laughed at because I have no money, even if the person who laughs at me is his father, he doesn't want to see it.

After the divorce, Xianger followed her grandmother and was taken care of by her. And I just asked for leave from the unit to engage in the beauty and health care industry. So every time I go to see him, I will bring them some health products. Because his grandmother is also in poor health.

Once, I brought the perfect aloe mineral crystal to his grandmother. Later, when I went to see them again, I asked my grandmother how she felt after eating mineral crystals. As a result, his grandmother said she didn't eat. I asked why? His grandmother told me that once when she was eating mineral crystals, Xianger saw it and said to his grandmother, Grandma, why did you eat so much at once? That thing is very expensive. My mother spent a lot of money on it. As a result, his grandmother was too angry to eat. If you say that you are not close, you only know that you are distressed.

Of course, his grandmother said angry words at the moment. After all, living together, she devoted herself to Xianger. In fact, Xianger and grandma have a good relationship and are respectful and filial to her.

He didn't really want to accuse his grandmother of anything. He is really worried that his mother is short of money.

After the divorce, every time I take him out to play, if it's dinner, he will try to order affordable food. If it is a movie, he will remind me in advance and let me buy tickets online.

Every time I send him back, I give him pocket money, but I always refuse to pick it up and say, mom, don't give me money. I have pocket money, and grandma will give it to me.

Every new year, I want to buy him new clothes. He always says, Mom doesn't have to spend money to buy them. I have clothes to wear.

Last year, Xianger's college entrance examination ended, so I specially asked for leave to take him to Hangzhou for a few days. On the way, he asked me, Mom, how much money do you have with you? I said there was not much cash, so I could pay by WeChat, and I also brought my bank card.

Then the whole trip, he wanted to save me money. Never take a taxi if you can walk or take a bus. Don't cook if you can eat noodles. I think the five-dollar bottle of mineral water in the scenic spot is too expensive, so I deliberately kept the bottle, let the water go in the hotel and took it in my bag. He asks me from time to time, do you have any money on you?

Finally, when I learned that the whole trip cost more than 3,000 yuan. Say, why do you spend so much money? What a distressed look.

In the first semester of college, call him and ask him if he has enough money. Do you want me to transfer some from WeChat to him? He said in despair, no, no, no. I said, what if you don't have enough money on you? He said I would ask grandma and dad for it.

Come back from school for the Spring Festival in winter vacation. It will be his 18 birthday soon. So I asked him what he wanted for his birthday and whether he wanted a new mobile phone. As a result, he said, you don't have to buy anything, and the old mobile phone can still be used.

A few days before the Chinese New Year, I took him and my niece to the streets to buy them clothes. When choosing clothes, he looks at the price first, and the one with high price will leave immediately. Finally, I found a store doing the preferential activities of buy one get one free. Two people happily chose their own clothes in that shop, saving me half of the money.

It is said that the daughter is a mother's little cotton-padded jacket, sensible and caring. I don't have a daughter, but I'm glad to have such a warm and considerate son. He is my down jacket. No matter how cold it is, there will be a warm current surging in his heart when he thinks of it.

Many parents say that their children are here to collect debts. But my favorite Faye Wong said that her Tong Tong (Leah Dou) came to repay her kindness.

Faye Wong and I feel the same way. My perfume is also here to pay off the debt.

Although it was difficult to conceive in October, I still remember the heartbreaking pain when I gave birth to him. When I take care of him alone, I have to take care of both work and housework, which also makes me exhausted and exhausted. But he brought me happiness and satisfaction as a mother, and made me feel that everything was worth it.

Especially after so many years of divorce, I didn't grow up with him. Not only did he never blame me, but he was as considerate and distressed as a child. It really makes me feel: with such a son, what else can my husband ask for?

Nowadays, many post-90 s and post-2000 s children like to wear brand-name clothes and show off their wealth with high-end mobile phones.

Some parents obviously live a hard life, and only by saving money can their children study. However, children don't understand the hardships and difficulties of their parents. Instead, I spend money indiscriminately and keep asking my parents for money. If they can't get it, they will even scold and resent their parents.

Therefore, an article on WeChat wrote: The most terrible thing in China is that the poor have produced many "rich second generation". More and more poor people have raised "rich second generation", which is actually a family education problem.

Therefore, I am very pleased that Xianger has developed the habit of thrift since she was a child and understands the hard work of her parents and the hard-won money.

Behind every child who likes to compare with others to show off his wealth and love vanity, there is a selfish and extremely inferior heart.

Because of selfishness, I won't feel bad for my parents. Because of inferiority, we need to prove ourselves by comparison.

And behind every child who is willing to be simple, practical and low-key, there is a considerate and confident heart.

Because I am considerate of others, I will not embarrass my parents, and even care about my parents.

Because of the confidence in my bones, I believe that I am excellent, and I don't need to rely on external things to prove myself.

If your child is not sensible, no matter how poor you are, he thinks you have money and keeps asking you for it.

If your child is sensible, no matter how rich you are, he still thinks that you are short of money and don't waste a penny.

There is a kind of coldness called "Your mother thinks you are cold".

There is a kind of lack of money, called "your child thinks you are short of money".

May we all have mothers who are worried about the changes in temperature and children who are grateful for their efforts.

May we all love correctly and be loved correctly by others.

May all flesh and blood in the world love each other more, and true blood is thicker than water.