Five classic funny jokes and stories

# Ability training # Introducing jokes is an important category of folk culture. Jokes make people laugh, sigh and think. The following are five classic and interesting joke stories shared by KaoNet. Welcome to read the reference!

1. Classic joke

In ancient times, there was a teacher who taught very well, but there was a problem: gluttony. Because of this problem, everyone is reluctant to ask him to teach.

The teacher had no way to make a living, so he had to beg the villagers to let him teach for a living. The villagers asked him, "Do you want seven bowls and eight dishes for dinner in the future?" He replied, "No." Some villagers didn't believe it, so they asked him to write a written statement. He quickly agreed, raised his pen, did not add words, and kept talking about things.

The villagers picked up the written evidence and read it to him again: "You don't need duck and fish, tofu side dishes are indispensable, and you can't want a penny." After reading it, everyone praised the teacher for changing.

At first, the villagers tried to treat him with good wine and meat. After a long time, they let him eat home-cooked food and stopped entertaining him like a guest. In the first few days, he said nothing, but after a few days, he cursed the villagers for ignoring him.

The villagers were also very angry, saying that he was capricious and treacherous, and showed him the written evidence.

Pointing to the contract, the teacher read slowly word by word: A duck can live without a chicken; Without fish, meat is ok; Green vegetables and tofu are indispensable, and you get what you pay for. "Then he said bluntly," isn't it written clearly in black and white? "

2. Classic and interesting joke stories

Once upon a time, a rich family sent their only son to a private school in order to cultivate a scholar who respected his ancestors. Ten years later, the rich young master still can't recognize a few words.

One day, a knowledgeable guest came to his house. His father invited guests to the living room, and they had tea and chatted. He heard that a knowledgeable guest had come and wanted to meet him. But I thought again: I can't appear ignorant in front of learned people, so I took a book and walked into the living room.

When the guest saw the young master come in with a book in his hand, he complimented him and said, "Young master is an ink drinker and must be very knowledgeable."

After listening, my father shook his head and said, "After studying for ten years, there is no ink on my chest, which is unbearable."

Hearing this, the young master thought: I can't read without drinking ink! So he went back to the house and ground a bowl full of ink. He felt that he was not enough to drink it. He ground another bowl and drank it again with his neck crooked. Then he rushed to the living room and said to his father, "Dad, don't tell anyone that my chest is out of ink." I just drank a lot of ink, so I should say that I am full of ink in the future. "

3. Classic and interesting joke stories

One day, the animals in the forest rowed a boat to the island for a holiday. Who knows, the boat rowed halfway and encountered a strong wind. The boat was teetering and about to capsize, and the animals were in chaos.

The monkey jumped out and said, "Don't mess around! The solution now is to reduce the weight of the ship. Who jumped off the boat voluntarily? "

Everybody, look at me. I look at you. Nobody said anything. The monkey rolled his eyes and said, "Then let's draw lots!" " Whoever smokes will get off! "

Speaking of which, the monkey suddenly thought that it wouldn't be bad if he painted it himself! So, he added: "I also have the opportunity to tell you a joke. If everyone is amused, there is no need to jump; " Anyone who doesn't laugh can't help it! The monkey thought: Who can compare with me in telling jokes? Everyone had no opinion, so we started to draw lots.

The monkey unfortunately got the first picture. He confidently walked to the middle of the boat and told a joke vividly.

The animals all laughed their heads off, and the monkeys were very proud. Looking back, he saw the pig sitting there without a smile. According to the rules, everyone pushed too many cooks off the boat at once.

The second is a goat. He also told an interesting joke. Everyone laughed, but the pig didn't laugh. So the animals pushed the goat off the boat again.

The third one is a flower cat. The flower cat sank in his heart and walked carefully to the middle of the boat, but this time, before he could speak, he heard the pig giggle.

Everyone asked strangely, "stupid pig, I haven't talked about it yet." What are you laughing at? "

The pig laughed for a long time, then shook his big ears and gasped and replied, "I just thought of the taste." It turns out that the joke told by the monkey just now is really funny! " "

4. Classic and interesting joke stories

In ancient times, there was a crocodile seller. Once he saw someone sneezing. He was surprised and asked the man. The man replied, "You don't know, this is because my wife misses me at home, every time she goes out."

The seller in Krooks was very unhappy after hearing this: My wife and I have a good relationship, but why doesn't she miss me every time I go out? The more I think about it, the more angry I get.

When he got home, he angrily scolded his wife: "I was away from home and worked hard." Why didn't you miss me? " The wife said, "I miss you every day!" " "He said," liar! You missed me. Why didn't I sneeze? Hearing this, his wife smiled and said, "Well, I will miss you more when I go out next time." "

The next time he went out, his wife secretly put some Chili powder on his right sleeve. On this day, the weather is very cold. When he was trying to cross the bridge, his nose fell off. He wiped his nose with his sleeve. I didn't expect to smell the spicy taste. He sneezed a few times, shook a crock with a pole in his hand and fell into the river, almost falling. He was so angry that he cursed again: "If you don't read, you won't read. Once you read it, you won't stop. You don't watch it early or late, just watch it when I cross the bridge! "

5. Classic and interesting joke stories

Sawyer invited his friends to eat in a restaurant, and they commented on the operating characteristics of the restaurant while eating. Sawyer said to his friend, "The waiter service here is really good. He gives everything to his customers and never refuses their demands. Even if you want a sunshine, they will pretend to take it according to your instructions, and later they will apologize to you that the sunshine has just been sold out. "

My friend was a little incredulous after hearing this. So Sawyer called the waiter: "Please give me two pieces of dinosaur meat."

"What kind of dinosaur meat do you like, sir?" The waiter asked with a smile.

"Well done."

The waiter wrote down the name of the dish and left. After a while, she came back: "Sir, I'm so sorry!" " "

"Why, it's sold out?" Sawyer deliberately showed disappointment.

"Sir, to tell you the truth, dinosaur meat and a little, just not too fresh. I can't bear to sell it to you. "