Teachers should tell stories and jokes before class. Do you have any good material? It's not funny to tell jokes found online.

Goody's family has a champion dog, who wins every fight with dogs ... both at home and abroad. ...

So he was arrogant ... challenging other dogs and barking at them. ...

One day, Goody took the champion dog for a walk on the road. ...

Seeing Raul leading a big dog, Guti's champion dog came running and barked.

Goody thought, wouldn't it be great if my champion dog beat Raul's dog?

So he said to Raul, "How about letting my champion dog hit your dog?"

Raul: "this ... is not good."

Goody: "It doesn't matter. If it really hurts your dog, I will stop it. "

Raul: "Still not good."

While the two of them were discussing, two dogs got into a fight, and the champion dog was defeated, which was extremely embarrassing. ...

Guti asked in surprise, "Raul, what kind of dog is this in your house?"

Raul: "Well, before his hair was pulled out, people called him a lion." A friend sold popsicles in the park for the first time, so he was embarrassed to shout. Then suddenly someone shouted "sell popsicles ~ ~ ~ sell popsicles ~ ~". Hearing this, my friend shouted happily, "Me too ~ ~ Me too ~ ~". One day, I was out of breath to catch the last bus. I shouted, Master! Master, wait for me ~

Suddenly a passenger poked his head out of the window and said to me slowly, Wukong, stop chasing.

A man saw a pile of things on the road, squatted down to smell it, said it might be poop, touched it with his hand and licked it in his mouth. It was really poop, but fortunately he didn't step on it! ~

A gentleman was practicing riding a bike when a pedestrian came up to him. A gentleman panicked and shouted, "Stop! Stop! " The pedestrians stopped in a daze. But a gentleman rode so badly that he knocked down a pedestrian. Pedestrians got up and got angry: "You told me to stop! You have a good aim, don't you! "

A polar bear stayed in a daze on the ice, and when he was really bored, he began to pluck his own hair. A ..........................................

In junior high school, a math teacher talked about equation transformation. On the platform, he rolled up his sleeves and shouted: Attention, students! I'm going to change! ……

Someone was practicing in a mental hospital, and suddenly a psychopath came after him with a kitchen knife. The man turned and ran until he reached a dead end, thinking it was over. The patient said, here's your knife. It's your turn to chase me. A man and a tiger were tied to two big trees. There was a candle under the rope that tied the tiger, and the rope was quickly burned. When the rope burned, the tiger ate the man. As a result, the man said a word.

He said, "Happy birthday! ! "The tiger blew out the candle. ...

During ... ............

Child: He took off his clothes and put on his trousers.

Teacher's comment: Is he going to take it off? Still have to wear it?

Title: Among them

Children: I hurt my left foot.

Teacher's comment: Are you a centipede?

Title: One after another.

Child: After work, Dad goes home one after another.

Teacher's comment: How many dads do you have?

Theme: sadness

Child: There is a ditch in front of my house, which is really sad.

Teacher's comment: The teacher is even sadder.

Title: Once again

Child: My mother is short, tall, fat and thin.

Teacher's comment: Is your mother a deformed diamond?

Title: Look.

Children: What are you looking at? Never seen it?

Teacher's comment: Don't procrastinate too much.

Title: Prosperity.

Children write: bustling confession.

Teacher's comment: Don't watch too many series!

Theme: Delicious

Children write: delicious fart.

Teacher: .........

Title: Innocent.

The child wrote: It's really hot today.

Teacher's comment: You are so naive.

Title: Sure enough

The children said: I ate fruit yesterday. Then I drank cold water.

Teacher's comment: a sentence that cannot be separated.

Theme: ... first, then ... Example: eat first, then take a bath.

Children: Goodbye, sir!

Teacher's comments: .................

Title: In addition,

Child: A train passes by, besides, besides.

Teacher's comment: forget it when I die. My son came home trembling: "Dad, I only got 60 points in the exam today." Dad is very angry: "Don't call me dad next time you fail the exam!" " "The next day, my son came back:" I'm sorry, brother! ""Last Sunday, I went back to my hometown in the countryside to see my grandparents. It happened that my uncle was there. We just chat and watch TV. Seeing that half of my uncles suddenly had a stomachache, I went to two places ... A few minutes later ... I suddenly heard a sentence from the second place: Ah ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Damn it! ! ! My grandmother went to the second place to scold my uncle and said, what a big man! And swear! Uncle: Sorry. Oh, my God. I just wiped P shares ... halfway through ... suddenly my nose runs. So I naturally picked up the toilet paper in my hand and wiped my nose ...

Once, I went to buy a fruit knife, watched it over and over again, and then asked the knife buyer to find something to try for me. The knife was fast and fast, so I cut my big finger with one knife and sprayed blood.

I said happily, "All right, come on."

I'm surprised that the knife buyer didn't charge me and insisted on giving me this knife.

When I turned around, the pain was unbearable. On the way from work yesterday, I chatted with my colleagues. She said that her husband was a pig, but he was born at the end of the year, which should be regarded as a pig's tail ... I immediately got hot-headed, and a sentence that I regretted for life blurted out loudly and excitedly: "I am a pig's head!" " ...

A man and a friend went to visit his grandmother. While he was talking to his grandmother, his friends began to eat peanuts on the coffee table and ate them all. When they left, his friend said to his grandmother, "Thank you for the peanuts." Grandma responded, "Oh! Hmm! Alas! Because all my teeth have fallen out, I can only suck out the chocolate. Old, cough. . .

A woman was walking at night when she suddenly saw a man coming towards her with open arms and hugging her. The man fell to the ground crying and said, this is the third piece. It's hard for me to bring a piece of glass home.

When I was shopping, I suddenly felt a stomachache, so I went into the hot pot restaurant on the corner 199. I want to borrow a toilet, but I can't find it on the first floor. So I ran to the second floor. The second floor was still under renovation, and it was empty, only to find that there was a faulty toilet door to be repaired. Please don't use it. I really can't help it. It's empty anyway. ! When I finished, I went downstairs and found no one there. Strangely, it's dinner time. Just now, I said downstairs at the wedding, why did you go to the building all at once? Even the waiter and receptionist were gone ... so I approached the bar and asked, "Is anyone there?" Why is there no one? At this moment, I saw a waiter coming out from under the bar and saying, *! ..... weren't you there when shit fell from the ceiling and hit the electric fan just now? You are very lucky.