Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - The Fox of Political Jokes in Southern Song Dynasty

The Fox of Political Jokes in Southern Song Dynasty

One day, the devil took the princess away and she kept screaming.

Devil: "Just scream ... no one will come to save you ..."

Princess: "Broken throat ... broken throat ..."

No one: "Princess ... I'm coming to save you ..."

Devil: "Speak of the devil and he will come ..."

Cao Cao: "Devil .. Why did you call me ..."

Demon: "Wow ... seeing a ghost"

Ghost: "Shit! Was discovered .. "

Shit: "Ghost, can you see me ..."

Devil: "Oh, my God! 」

God: "Who called me? 」

Who: "Nobody called you ..."

Nobody said, "Where am I? Play dumb! 」

Garlic: "Who is pretending to be me? 」

Who: "It's me again? Are you looking for trouble? 」

Trouble: "which one is looking for me?" 」

Which one: "Looking for you? I didn't ... Gee, there are so many people here. 」

Many people: "I just arrived … who are you?" ? 」

Which one: "I'm not who. 」

Who: "He's not me. 」

Princess: "Is everyone here to save me? 」

Everyone: "I'm not here to save you, I'm here to watch the fun." 」

Lively: "What do I have to see? 」

God: "It's none of my business. I'll go first. " 」

Devil: "You answer a question before you go. Why do so many people save the princess? " ? I am a demon.

How did Wang play? 」

Go down: "You good devil won't do it, what shall I do?" 」

Princess: "if no one hits the devil, I can go." 」

No one: "If I play the devil, how can I let you go ..."

How come: "I won't let the princess go, I want to watch the excitement." 」

Lively: "What are you looking at me for? 」

What: "You want to fuck me? Rogue! 」

How dare you: "I didn't? 」

Me: "What does it have to do with me?" 」

Devil: "Shit! I'm going crazy. 」

Shit: "What am I doing? ...」

Madman: "What do you want me to do? 」

You want me to say, "I don't know anything! 」

I don't know anything: "I don't know! 」

I don't know: "I'm here! Is someone calling me? 」

Someone said, "I didn't call you! 」

I didn't say, "Who called him? 」

Who: "Wrong ... I didn't ..."

I didn't say, "I haven't wronged you ..."

You: "I dare you. 」

I dare you: "Who says I dare not! ? 」

Who: "please ... I didn't say anything."

I have nothing: "What do you want me to say? 」

I am nothing: "... you ... aren't you my long-lost brother?" ”」

My long-lost brother: "Kao ... my name is very long ... and I will be called."

Ah ... "

Who: "... I want to leave this troublesome place. "

True or false: "So this is my place ..."

I am nothing &; No: "Stop arguing, we are talking ..."

Don't bother us: "I won't talk ..."

I didn't: "I didn't speak! ...」

I am nothing: "-_-\ \" ... Let's go out and talk ... "

Go: "I'm sorry ... (wriggle)"

I have nothing: "It's none of your business ... Go away ..." (Two brothers go out angrily)

It's none of your business: "Whoops ... why did you kick me out ..."

Why: "I don't want to kick you out ... listen ... don't cry."

I didn't say, "Oh ... What does it have to do with me?"

None of my business: "What? Did anyone call me? 」

Someone said, "Who wants to call you ..."

Who: "I really have to go ... T.T." "

Go: "I'm really embarrassed ... * v.v *" (\ \" Who \ \ "collapsed)

None of your business: "... aren't you my cousin?" ”」

It's none of my business: "... cousins of the same age (or cousins) ... long time no see ..."

For a long time: "I'm not here ..."

Devil: "Are you finished? 」

Endless: "He doesn't have me."

You: "I don't have him."

I just said, "Who said that? 」

Who: "What do you want me to do? 」

Do you want to fuck me? 」

You: "I won't fuck him."

I said, "Who said I wouldn't? 」

Who: "Wrong! I didn't say ... "

He said, "What should I do? 」

? "You two are shameless! 」

You two: "I want it! I want it! 」

Face: "Who wants me? 」

Who: "I don't want it."

Devil: "Hurry up, or I'll kick people out."

Man: "Kick me out? Looking for k "

K: "Who wants to see me? 」

Who: "aaaaaaa! Don't mention my name, mention me again! 」

He said, "Don't trust me."

Me: "Who wants me? 」

Who: "I finally caught one. Kill it. "

One: "Don't arrest me."

Me: "I've had enough, too. If anyone mentions my name again, I will never let you go! 」

Who said, "Look at my eighteen dragon palms! 」

Me: "Look at my nine yin bones and claws! 」

Eighteen palms of dragon descending: "What am I to see? 」

Jiuyin Bones Claw: "What am I to see? 」

What's there to see: "Brother, I finally found you! 」

What is there to see? "Brother, let's go out and talk. 」

Devil: "Oh, my God ... this is an engagement party ..."

From then on, the devil really got schizophrenia ...

Proudest: Goose

The most painful: drought

The most pictographic character: a.

Maximum: swing

The most direct: Kun

The westernmost: bite

The least afraid of scalding: Wei.

Most frequently: sorry, I can't type this word. It says "day" above and "sign" below.

Xiao Bai: I learned some computer knowledge today. Very impressive.

Hacker: Tell me about it.

Xiao Bai: You can make everything on the computer invisible at once.

Hacker: dizzy! You don't say! I've never heard of it.

Xiao Bai: If you turn off the monitor, there will be nothing, haha, clever ~

Hacker: Go to hell ~

Hacker: Why are there so many things on your computer desktop?

Xiao Bai: It's easy to find.

Hacker: But why did you put the DVD movie on the desktop?

Xiao Bai: I watched a movie with porridge. It's so touching.

Hacker: ```````````````````````````````````.

Xiaobai: Xiaohei, let me ask you something. Why does the computer always prompt "There is not enough space on drive C to release"?

Hacker: Get down!

Hacker: Hey!

Hacker: Hey! Xiaobai ~

Hacker: Why are you ignoring me?

Xiaobai: I'm crying.

Hacker: Huh? What happened? Who bullied you?

Xiao Bai: No, nobody bullied me.

Hacker: Then why are you crying?

Xiao Bai: Look at the crayon Xiao Xin, Xiao Xin has lost it ~ He is so poor ~555555~

Hacker:-_-|||, then you continue to cry! ! ! !

Xiao Bai: I want to install anti-virus software.

Hacker: Well, well, your computer needs antivirus.

Xiao Bai: I want to install a famous brand, preferably Sony or BMW.

Hacker: How about Adidas?

Xiaobai: OK, please help me install it.

Hacker: Shit! I have something to do!

Xiao Bai: Xiao Hei, what if I want to delete something I don't use on my computer, but I can't?

Hacker: You can press F8 to enter "Command Safe Mode" when starting the computer-> "path"->; DEL file name again, ok ~

Xiao Bai: I want to delete windows from drive C.

Hacker: That's the system folder.

Xiao Bai: But I have never used it.

Hacker: I shouldn't discuss this problem with you! ~

Xiao Bai: I have a foreign nickname on QQ.

Hacker: What's your name?

Xiaobai: the hacker's grandfather

Hacker: Shit, he NND, who is it? Send me the number!

Xiaobai: number: XXXXXXXXX

(It's been 15 minutes)

Hacker: He is a computer idiot!

Xiao Bai: How do you know?

Hacker: He said you can use DOS.

Xiaobai: ``````````````````````````````````````````.

Xiao Bai: Do you really think I'm an idiot?

Hacker: Yes, it is.

Xiao Bai: My net friend said I was smart.

Hacker: What did they say?

Xiao Bai: I won't tell you * _ *

Hacker: You must have sent them PLMM photos again, right?

Xiao Bai: How do you know? ~~~~

Hacker: Cut! !

Xiao Bai: Xiao Bai? There is food in the summer vacation. Is there anything interesting?

Hacker: Yes, why do you ask this suddenly?

Xiao Bai: Then send it to me. Be specific.

Hacker: Oh, wait.

(15 minutes later)

Hacker: No, why should I send it to you?

Xiao Bai: The teacher asked me to hand in my summer homework and write down 10 interesting things in the summer vacation.

Hacker: Shit, shit! !

Hacker: Have we known each other for some time?

Xiao Bai: Yes.

Hacker: Do you think I am good to you?

Xiao Bai: Not bad.

Hacker: Hee hee (shy)

Xiao Bai: Why? Want to borrow money?

Hacker: ````````````````````````````````.

Xiaobai: I still owe the monitor 5 yuan rice money!

Hacker: When I didn't ask anything.

Xiao Bai: Come out! Ask you!

Hacker: What?

Xiaobai: Can you steal QQ?

Hacker: Nonsense!

Xiaobai: Then help me steal a Q.

Hacker: Say numbers.

Xiaobai: 10000

Hacker:! #¥%……—*

Xiao Bai: Today I helped my classmate repair the computer.

Hacker: Just you?

Xiao Bai: Yes.

Hacker: It's a miracle that you can repair computers.

Xiao Bai: What's so strange? Her CD-ROM drive can't watch movies.

Hacker: Did she put the DVD movie in the VCD drive and couldn't play it out?

Xiao Bai: Right, so I know her CD-ROM drive must be broken. Tell her to buy another VCD drive tomorrow.

Hacker: ...

Xiao Bai: Xiao Bai, what are you doing?

Xiao Bai: Hey, say something!

Xiao Bai: Three seconds, come out! ! ! !

Hacker: (3, 2 ...) Here we go! ! ! ! Just went to the movies.

Xiao Bai: What movie are you watching?

Hacker: Er ... I don't know.

Xiao Bai: Let me see.

Hacker: OK, I'll show you, Gaga! ! ! !

Xiao Bai: What's this? You can't tell whose leg it is with so many legs.

Hacker: Crash ~ When I didn't do anything!

Hacker: My enemy found me.

Xiao Bai: Ah, then run away quickly.

Hacker: Where to escape?

Xiao Bai: Go to a deep cliff. There are martial arts secrets below. You can practice for ten or eight years before flying up for revenge.

Hacker: Go to hell! !

Hacker: I control your computer.

Xiao Bai: How is it controlled?

Hacker: Using Trojan Horse

Xiao Bai: Yes. . . . . . Where is it? I am not blind.

Hacker: Open your task manager.

Xiao Bai: Yes. . . . . . . Where is the task manager?

Hacker:. . . . . Under your computer! !

Xiao Bai: It's not in my computer.

Hacker: Forget it. I didn't do anything.

Hacker: I have taken control of your computer.

Xiao Bai: Oh

Hacker: Are you afraid? ! Hey hey.

Xiao Bai: Just in time. Help me kill the virus. Recently, my computer has had many problems.

Hacker:. . . . . .

Xiao Bai: Why do you always come in and out of my computer at will?

Hacker: You can install firewall.

Xiao Bai: Can't you get in by installing a firewall?

Hacker: No, I just want to add some fun. Controlling your computer like this makes me feel stupid.

Xiao Bai: I heard that you can make viruses? !

Hacker: Hmm

Xiao Bai: You can control other people's computers? !

Hacker: General.

Xiao Bai: Then can you hack those websites?

Hacker: Of course, didn't you hear people call me a hacker?

Xiao Bai: Yes. . . . Oh ~ ~ ~ `I thought it was because you were black. . . . .

"Mao ~ ~"

Hacker: I'm here again! !

Xiao Bai: Don't you feel bored coming in every day?

Hacker: Yes, it is. Your machine is the worst I have ever seen.

Xiao Bai: No way, it's a famous brand.

Hacker: I mean, there are only viruses in your computer besides mentally retarded games.

Xiao Bai: Oh ~ ~ Have you seen my Lianliankan? I don't remember where it is. I've been looking for it for a long time.

Hacker:. . . . . See you again.

Xiao Bai: Come out!

Hacker: Why?

Xiao Bai: Did you find it after reading it?

Hacker:No. 。

Xiao Bai: I'm still a hacker. I can't find it. Stop!

Hacker: ...

Hacker: Hi ~ ~ ~ I'm coming!

Xiao Bai: I haven't seen you for several days. Are you blocked by my firewall?

Hacker: Haha, just kidding, it's easier to access your computer than mine. You don't miss me, do you?

Xiao Bai: I want to ask you a favor.

Hacker: What is it?

Xiao Bai: Can you access the power system and modify some data?

Hacker:. . . . . . What do you want? !

Xiao Bai: Please help me settle my electricity bill this month. . . . . .

Hacker: Go to hell! !

Hacker: Where the hell have you been? ! ! !

Xiao Bai: Yes. . . . I have been out for a few days. What do you want from me?

Hacker: I want to find something.

Xiao Bai: What are you looking for here?

Hacker: Virus, find an old virus from a few years ago. Only your computer has the most complete virus.

Hacker: I'm coming! !

. . . . . .

Hacker: Why don't you talk?

Xiao Bai: In a bad mood.

Hacker: Who bullied you?

Xiao Bai: I lost a Q number with my first love in it.

Hacker: This is simple. I'll get it back for you.

Xiaobai: I can't get it back.

Hacker: Impossible. Tell me, what number?

Xiao Bai: Woo ~ ~ ~ I just can't remember.

Xiao Bai: Come out! ! ! !

Hacker: What's the matter? !

Xiaobai: Did you use my id to play in the forum? ! !

Hacker:. . . . Sorry, I forgot to tell you that I didn't do anything wrong, so I added a post, and I promise I won't play again next time.

Xiao Bai: That won't do! ! !

Hacker: What else do you want?

Xiao Bai: Your post is red in the face. First blush. I'm so happy. You must make me another one.

Hacker: Get down!

Hacker: Hey, I just did something very interesting.

Xiao Bai: What's this?

Hacker: I sent it to the forum.

Xiao Bai: This is normal.

Hacker: I insist as soon as I see it, and I will call the landlord a pig.

Xiao Bai: Wow, it's so pleasant. I never dared. I'll be burned!

Hacker: Yes, it has been banned.

Xiao Bai: Is this still interesting? !

Hacker: Yes, because I used your ID.

Xiao Bai: Are you an expert?

Hacker: It can be said that it is.

Xiao Bai: How high is it?

Hacker: Well, I hack myself when I'm bored.

Xiao Bai: Ha, I can do it too!

Hacker: # $%! You can, too? !

Xiao Bai: Yes, it turned black as soon as it was turned off. . . . .

Hacker: Get out!