Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Classical Chinese Enlightenment Reader Translation 10 1 to 20 1
Classical Chinese Enlightenment Reader Translation 10 1 to 20 1
The word Zongxi, No.,is from Nieyang, Nanyang. His uncle, Zong Bing, is a scholar, but refuses to be an official. When Zong Xi was a child, Zong Bing asked him what his ambition was when he grew up. He replied, "I hope to drive strong winds to disperse the huge waves across Wan Li." Zong Bing said: "Even if you can't be rich or expensive, you will certainly honor your ancestors." Once Zongbi's brother got married, and robbers came to rob him on their wedding night. At that time, Zong Bi was only 14 years old, but he stepped forward and fought with the robbers, beating a dozen robbers to pieces.
102, perfect
Legend has it that there was once a man named Guo Han who slept in the yard one summer night because it was hot. He looked up at the sky and saw a bright moon hanging on the floating white clouds. Suddenly, a floating cloud turned into a fairy and fell from the sky. Guo Han thought it was in a dream, but suddenly a fairy appeared in front of him, obviously in reality. So he stood up quickly, bowed to the fairy and said, "Where did the fairy come from?" The fairy returned a gift and whispered, I am the weaver girl in the sky. "Guo Han carefully looked at the clothes of the weaver girl. I don't know what material it is made of. To his surprise, she wore this seamless dress. I couldn't help wondering, so I asked, "Why aren't the clothes you're wearing sewn? "The Weaver Girl replied with a smile:" I am wearing a heavenly coat, not sewn with needle and thread, so naturally I didn't sew.
103, Mr. and Mrs. Li
Li was a childhood friend. Ten years later, the two met on the road. Li invited him home to kill the chicken and cook. But soon after eating, Huang Sheng's stomach hurts, and it hurts as much as beans. Mr. and Mrs. Li are very scared and are going to see a doctor. Huang Sheng insisted on not letting them go (to see a doctor), saying that it was an old habit again, and it didn't matter. The mountain road is rugged and the road surface is slippery. After midnight, I came back with the doctor. The doctor gave (Huang Sheng) acupuncture and recovered after a while. He said to Li, "You have suffered for me! How can I repay you? Mr. Li and Mrs. Li said, "You are my friend and should be very careful and patient with you. Why do you say these things? "? It cleared up the next day and Huang Sheng left.
104, horse bites thief steamed stuffed bun
At the invitation of a friend, Dong went to a friend's house for a banquet and drank very hard. He was drunk from noon to night. When his friends saw him, they wanted to put him up. Don't worry, I can still go home by car. It was dark and windy, and soon I fell off my horse because of drunkenness. I lay flat on the side of the road, holding the reins in my hand. After a while, a robber passed by and was very happy to see it. He said to himself, "God help me."
105, female soldier
Tang Gaozu's third daughter married Chai Shao when she was a child. Gao Zu rose up against Sui Dynasty, and Shao and his wife made a plan for the future: "To respect the public and destroy the world, Shao wants to meet the banner of righteousness, but he can't go with him. If I go alone, I will be harmed." What are the chances? " "Wife's Day": "You should leave early. Give it to a woman and take care of yourself for a while. "Shao immediately went to Taiyuan for high-impedance. His wife was transferred back to Huxian county, scattered her fortune, and rose to see Gaozu. She got 70 thousand soldiers, many of them women, and surrounded the capital with Taizong. 1, female soldier. The capital is Ping, named Princess Pingyang.
106, the more the better.
In his spare time, Liu Bang once discussed the talent of generals with Han Xin. Each has its own high and low. Liu Bang asked, "How many soldiers can I command like myself? Han Xin said, "Your Majesty, you can only command one hundred thousand people." Liu Bang said, "How much can you command for you?" Han Xin replied, "The more soldiers I command, the better." Liu Bang said with a smile: "The more soldiers I command, the better. Then why did I control it? Han Xin said, "Your Majesty can't command soldiers, but he is good at leading generals. That's why Han Xin is under your control. And your majesty's ability is innate and beyond human reach. "
107, dead sheep at the crossroads.
One day, Andy's neighbor lost a sheep, and the owner was very worried. He immediately led his relatives and friends to pursue it, and invited Andy's servants to go with him. Andy said, "Haha, it's just that a sheep was lost. Why do so many people want to find it? " The neighbor said, "There are many forks in the road." Soon, they came back. Yang Zi asked, "Did you find the sheep? The neighbor replied, "I ran away." Andy said, "How could I run away? The neighbor replied, "There is another fork in the road. I don't know which way the sheep fled, so I came back. "
108, Song Lian studied hard.
I liked studying when I was young. Because my family is poor, I can't afford to buy books. I often borrow books from people who collect books, copy them myself and return them on an agreed date. When the weather was very cold, the water in the inkstone pool was frozen into hard ice, and my fingers could not bend and stretch, so I still didn't slack off. After copying, I will return it to others as soon as possible, and dare not exceed the agreed time limit. Therefore, most people are willing to lend me books, so I can read a lot of books. Come of age. I'm afraid I can't make friends with knowledgeable teachers and celebrities. I ran hundreds of miles away with a scripture in my hand and asked my compatriots for advice. My predecessor was noble and famous, and his master students crowded his room. His words and attitude have never been euphemistic. I stood beside him, asking questions, asking truth, and bending down to ask him for advice. Sometimes I am reprimanded, my expression is more respectful, my manners are more thoughtful, and I dare not answer a word; When he was happy, I asked him for advice again. So although I was stupid, I finally learned a lot.
109, the jade is not cut, the abrasive is not cut.
Jade cannot be used as an artifact unless it is polished. People can't understand the truth without studying. However, this object, jade, has the characteristic of never changing. Even if it is not polished into an artifact, it will not damage its characteristics as a jade article. Human nature may change because of the influence of external things. If they don't study, they may lose their gentlemanly manners and become villains. This cannot be ignored.
1 10, dogs have spirits.
In the middle of Chaotai River, Yang Sheng, a native of Guangling, keeps a dog. He likes it very much and often travels with dogs. Yang Sheng was drunk and walked to the grass by the pond. He is asleep and can't move. It was winter, the wildfire was burning and the wind was strong. The dog kept waking him up around him, but Yang Sheng was drunk and didn't know it. There was a puddle in front of Yang Sheng, so the dog went into the water, turned around and sprinkled water on him. Fell to the ground. The fire bypassed. Yang Sheng woke up and saw it. One night, Yang Sheng accidentally fell into an empty well on the road. The dog barked all night. After a while, someone passed by and thought it was strange for the dog to bark at the well. He has seen Yang Sheng in the past. Yang Sheng said, "If you can save me, I will repay you generously." The man said, "If you. I'll save you. " Yang Sheng said, "This dog saved me from death. I can't give it to you. I won't be stingy if you want anything else. " The man said, "In that case, I won't save you." The dog buried his head and looked into the well. Yang Sheng understood what it meant, so he told passers-by to give him the dog. Passers-by saved Yang Sheng and left after asking for the dog.
Liu married a blind girl.
When Su Shi, an essayist in the Northern Song Dynasty, was appointed as the magistrate, Liu was the chief justice of the state capital. Once upon a time, Liu didn't take the Jinshi exam. The matchmaker introduced him to a girl from the same village, and Liu agreed. Later, Liu took the Jinshi exam and prepared to get married. At this time, the girl was blind. Her parents estimated that Liu wouldn't want her, so they didn't mention it to him again. It is suggested that Liu marry her youngest daughter. Finally, she married a blind girl and gave birth to several children. Soon, she died unfortunately. Liu was very sad and refused to continue her marriage. She has been single and widowed.
1 12, scholars read other words.
A scholar likes reading very much, but there are many typos. One day, while he was reading Water Margin, a friend happened to visit him. Ask him after seeing it, brother, what book are you reading? The scholar replied: Xu Shui. The friend was surprised and said, I have heard of many books, but I have never seen this one. He added: Who are the people recorded in the book? The scholar said: There is a Li Da. The friend said: this is even more strange. There are so many famous ancients, but I have never heard of a man named Li Da. What does this man look like? The scholar said: He has two Da Die in his hand ... The friend asked: Who else? The scholar replied: Once upon a time there was a monk named Yu. His friend couldn't help laughing when he saw so many typos.
1 13, Zhang Hu Hao Xia
Zhang Hu has been wandering around the Jianghuai area since his last visit. He often gathers people to drink and calls himself a hero in the Jianghu. One night, a man was dressed in night clothes and martial arts, with a sword hanging around his waist and a bag in his hand. There was something in the bag, and blood came out of it. When someone came in, he asked, "Isn't this Zhang Xia's residence?" "Zhang Hu replied," Yes. " I respectfully asked the man to come in and sit down. The bearer said, "I have an enemy for ten years." I killed him tonight and got revenge. "
1 14, itchy
Once upon a time, there was a man who was itchy. He asked his son to help him catch it, but he didn't catch the right place three times. He let his wife catch him, but he didn't get it right five times. The man was furious and said, "You are my wife. You should know me. Why can't you catch my itch? " So I made it myself, and it stopped itching once. Why? Itching, everyone knows, how can you miss it?
1 15, torture sheepskin finalized
On the main road, a man carrying a salt bag and a firewood collector went into town together. At noon, they rested under a tree, covered with a sheepskin brought by a salt bearer. After a short rest, the porter is ready to move on. When he turned his head, he found that the man carrying salt was asleep. The firewood picker became greedy, stole the sheepskin and went on his way. When the salt carrier woke up, he found that the sheepskin was gone, so he concluded that it was stolen by the firewood collector. "For that sheepskin, they sued the county magistrate. After hearing their lawsuit, the magistrate immediately asked two magistrates to torture sheepskin. After playing for a while, the magistrate stopped him and let them have a look at the sheepskin. As a result, the salt carrier was happy, but the firewood carrier was frightened and had to tell the truth about stealing sheepskin. It turned out that after the magistrate tortured the sheepskin with a wooden stick, a lot of salt powder was scattered on the sheepskin.
1 16, Ouyang Ye solved the case.
When Ouyang Ye (word rihua) was in charge of Ezhou in Song Dynasty, a citizen died because of a boat dispute, and the case hung for a long time without a verdict. Ouyang Ye personally went to the prison, took the prisoners out, sat them in the hall, removed their handcuffs and shackles, gave them food, gave them good condolences, and then sent them back to the prison, leaving only one person in the hall. Ouyang Ye said, "This man looks scared." The man denied it. Ouyang Ye said: "People who observe the diet use their right hands, only you use your left hand, and the right chest of the person who was killed was injured, which is the evidence that you killed someone." The man cried and confessed.
1 17
A man was very poor, but he devoted his life to Lv Zu. According to legend, Lv Zu was the ancestor of Taoism. Lv Dongbin was moved by his sincerity. One day, he suddenly fell from the sky and came to his home. When he saw that his house had only four walls, he was very poor. He couldn't help feeling sorry for him, so he stretched out a finger and pointed to a big stone in his yard. The stone turned into gold at once and said, "Do you want him?" "The man bowed again and said," I don't want it. Lv Dongbin was very happy and said, "You can really teach you the real way to become an immortal, without selfishness. "No, I want your finger." "Lv Dongbin suddenly disappeared.
1 18, the original valley about
Haraguchi's grandfather is old, and his parents hate him very much, so they want to abandon him. Haraguchi was fifteen years old at this time, and he advised his father: Grandpa had children and lived frugally all his life. How can you abandon him just because he is old? This is ingratitude ... my father didn't listen to his advice, made a cart and threw it into the wild with my grandfather. The original mouth followed, pulling the cart back. Father asked, what did you bring this terrible tool back for? Yuangu said, when you get old, I won't have to make another one. I'll put it away now. Father was ashamed and regretted his behavior, so he went to take grandpa back to support him.
1 19, Li Cunshen exhorted.
Li Cunshen was born in poverty and had a low status. He often tells his children: "Your father went to the village with a sword when he was young, and within forty years, he was a general and a prime minister. During this period, he escaped from danger and survived more than once, and pulled out an arrow hundreds of times. " So he gave the arrow to his son and told him to collect it, saying, "You were born in a rich family." You should know that's how your father started. "Li Cunshen was born in poverty and had no status. He often tells his children, "Your father left his hometown with only a sword when he was young. For forty years, his position in by going up one flight of stairs. In the middle, after complete death, there is more than one danger of gaining life. More than one hundred arrows were taken out of his flesh and blood. So he took out his arrows and told them to put them away.
120, toad
Once upon a time, there was a very pedantic chef. He bought chicken and meat from the market and put them in the kitchen. Just then, when a friend visited, he went into the room to talk to his friend. After the friend left, the cook saw cats and dogs stealing chickens and eating meat. The cook was very anxious and said to the cats and dogs, "Why are you so unkind?" Have I ever wronged you? " The cats and dogs didn't seem to hear, and they ate more fiercely. The chef added, "I am always honest and kind to you." Do you want to bully me today? " "After a while, the ground was full of leftover bones, and the cats and dogs ran away. Someone said, "This cook is really pedantic. He is a cat and a dog. How can you treat him like a human being? You should blame yourself. "
12 1, eat porridge.
Fan Zhongyan's family is poor. When he was studying in Du Nan College, he always cooked two liters of rice and cooked a pot of porridge. After a night of solidification, he cut it into four pieces with a knife. He ate two tablets in the morning, two tablets in the evening and some pickles. A son stayed to study with him and went back to his hometown to accompany his father. Before he left, he cooked several good dishes for Fan Zhongyan. Fan Zhongyan put them aside, and soon all the food rotted. Zi Yi said, "Fan Zhongyan said," It's not that I don't thank you for your kindness. It's just that I have been eating porridge for a long time and my heart is very stable. Now I want to enjoy such a rich meal, how can I eat this bowl of porridge again in the future? "
The lion king and the jackal.
Once upon a time, there was a lion king on the mountain. One day, he caught a jackal in the deep mountain and was going to eat it. The jackal said, "I send two deer to your king every month to redeem my life." The lion king is very happy. The jackal will send deer to the lion king at the appointed time every month. He also makes a living by catching foxes and rabbits. Today, several years later, it's your turn. What can you do? "The jackal was speechless and was eaten by the lion.
123, Ophiopogon japonicus
Once upon a time, a man named Tian saw a snake hurt. Another snake put grass on its wound. A few days later, the injured snake recovered and left. A man named Tian used the leaves left by this grass to treat the sores of life, and all of them were cured. People don't know the name of this grass, so they take it as their own name. It is said in Bao Puzi that it is ok to take grass from the snake.
124, Luo Yi mo yanxue
In ancient times, there was a calligraphy student who thought he had learned it, so he said goodbye to Master. Master said, "I have a box of things that I don't want to give to others. I hope to put it under a mountain." The man took it. Because the seal of something was not tightly sealed, he opened it and found dozens of inkstones with holes in them, only to know that it was used by Master before. I suddenly felt ashamed and went back to study.
125, sell melons and subtract words
A farmer planted several acres of watermelons, and when the harvest was just right, he picked them out and sold them. The sign says, "This watermelon is for sale." A scholar walked by and said, the word "this" can be removed, and only "watermelon is for sale." The farmer thought it was right, so he did it. Another scholar saw it and said, "Everyone can see that this is a watermelon, so why bother?" So the farmer moved it. Later, another scholar came and said, "Watermelon is for sale, right?" The word "sell" should be deleted. "The farmer was surprised and deleted it. There happened to be an old man next to him who said, "You can delete all five words, but you must write the price. "So the farmer nodded and changed it to: two words per catty. The reason is that what should be saved is saved, and what should not be saved is not saved. It should be based on the actual situation.
126, Wang Anshi does not whip a scholar.
When Wang Anqi was in charge of the literature and history of the East China Sea, the officers arrested a man who had made a night ban. Wang Anqi asked, "Where are you from?" "The man replied," I didn't realize it was dark until I came back from the teacher's class. "Wang Anqi said," if you establish prestige by whipping people who study hard like Ning Yue, I'm afraid this is not the basis of governing a good place. "Let the police officer to send the man home.
127, Yi Fu
Among the wild animals, there is a kind called Lin, which is small, good at climbing trees and has sharp claws. Let the tiger scratch his head when it itches. The tiger is very comfortable and has no feeling. Lin ate its brain slowly, and gave the rest to the tiger, saying, "I got some delicious food by accident." Love me and forget your appetite. "After eating, I realized. After a long time, the tiger's head was empty and his heart ached, looking for traces of the forest. But Lin has run to that tall tree. The tiger jumped up and shouted that he was dead.
128, Meng Mu Broken Weave
When Mencius was young, he once came home from school and his mother was weaving. He asked, "How was your study? Mencius (casually) replied: "The same as in the past." Meng Mu (annoyed at his indifference) cut the cloth with scissors. Mencius was very afraid. He asked his mother, "Why are you so angry? Meng Mu said, "You neglected your studies, just like I cut this cloth. Virtuous people study to establish a reputation, and ask questions to increase their knowledge. So they can be safe at ordinary times and avoid disasters when they act. If you neglect your studies now, you will inevitably do rough work, and disaster is inevitable. " Mencius was shocked after hearing this. From then on, he studied hard from morning till night and finally became a world-famous teacher.
129, He Meigu's wife
During the Guangxu period in the late Qing Dynasty, there was a man named He Meigu, who was famous for studying Confucius and Mencius. His wife is very Buddhist and recites the words "mercy, compassion, salvation and avalokitesvara" every day from morning till night 1000 times. He Meigu wouldn't let her see it, but she wouldn't listen. He Meigu is worried that she will become the laughing stock of literati. One day, he was called "madam" and his wife agreed. He called again and his wife agreed; He also called to say that his wife began to get angry and ignored him; He Meigu became more excited and called several times in succession. His wife was furious: "It's like calling a soul. It's endless. It's really annoying." Mei-gu He said, "I just called a few times, and you got impatient. You read Guanyin a thousand times a day, but you say that the Bodhisattva is tireless? " His wife suddenly realized that she would never read Guanyin every day again. He Meigu skillfully designed an atmosphere that made her uneasy. Through this atmosphere, she found it annoying to read Guanyin every day, and finally achieved the effect of persuading her.
130, I don't know my own family.
Once upon a time, there was a foolish man who often hung his shoes outside the door as a sign. One day, he went out. At noon, it suddenly began to rain. His wife put his shoes in. In the evening, the stupid man went home. He didn't see his shoes and asked in surprise, "Did my family move?" I can't walk back and forth. His wife saw him and asked, "This is your house. Why don't you go in?" The fool said, "Without shoes, this is not my home." The wife said, "Don't you know me?" The foolish man observed his wife carefully and then suddenly realized.
13 1, snipe and clam compete.
As soon as the mussel climbed to the beach and opened its shell to bask in the sun, it was attacked by a snipe and pecked at its meat. Mytilus sensitively disturbs its hard shell and tightly grips the long beak of snipe. The snipe said to the clam, "If it doesn't rain today, if it doesn't rain tomorrow, you will be killed by the sun." The mussel also said to the snipe, "Your mouth can't be pulled out today." Neither snipe nor clam will let anyone. As a result, they were caught by fishermen effortlessly.
132, make the finishing point
According to legend, one year, Liang Wudi asked Zhang Sengyou to paint the Anton Temple in Jinling, and drew four golden dragons on the temple wall. He drew them quickly, but he didn't draw eyes. He said, "I just clicked my eyes and flew away." People thought his words were ridiculous, so they tried to draw the eyes of a dragon. After a while, lightning broke the wall and the dragonfly flew into the air next to Yun Fei. The other three dragons did not draw eyes.
133, Han Xin drilled crotch.
There was a rogue boy in Huaiyin who wanted to insult Han Xin. He said to Han Xin, "Although you are tall and big, and like to wear swords, you are very timid at heart! He insulted Han Xin in public and said, "Han Xin, if you are not afraid (can: resist) death, stab me;" "If you are afraid of death, climb to my crotch." At this moment, Han Xin stared at the man for a long time, then crouched down and climbed under the man's crotch. The whole city laughed at him and thought he was timid. Later, he said that he could endure a little humiliation, and eventually he succeeded, so he could endure the "humiliation of his legs."
134, Lili committed suicide.
Li Li, a judge in Jin Wengong, heard that the case was wrong and ended his life in vain. When he found out, he detained himself and sentenced him to death. Wen Gong said, "Different official positions have different punishments. This is the fault of your officials, not your sin. " Li Li said: "I served as the chief executive officer and never gave up my high position to my subordinates;" I got a lot of official salaries and didn't give them any benefits. Now, I listen to the case and die in vain, but I want to blame my subordinates. I have never heard of this truth. " He refused to accept Wen Gong's orders. Wen Gong said, "You feel guilty, so why am I guilty? Li Li said: "There are laws and regulations for judges to decide cases. If you make a mistake, you will be punished personally. If they kill someone by mistake, they will pay for their lives with death. You only made me a judge because I can listen to subtle secrets and decide difficult cases. Now I heard that the case was wrong, killing people for nothing should be sentenced to death. "So I refused to accept Jin Wengong's pardon and fell dead.
135, two magpies save friends
There is an old tree in someone's garden with a nest built by magpies. Almost all magpies hatched by magpie mothers have become young birds. One day, a magpie circled the nest and kept howling sadly. After a while, groups of magpies gradually heard the sound and gathered in the tree. The two magpies were still cursing each other in the tree, just like talking, and left soon. After a while. Two magpies followed it. The magpie saw it and cried loudly, as if he had something to say. The stork cackled again, as if agreeing to the magpie's request. The stork circled the ancient tree three times, suddenly rushed down the magpie's nest, took out a red snake and swallowed it. The magpie cheered as if celebrating and thanked the stork.
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