The scariest joke in the world

The scariest joke in the world. In life, some people like to watch jokes, some are interesting, but some are horrible. I will share with you the scariest joke in the world.

The scariest joke in the world 1 hit a ghost.

Three people sat together, chatting about their experiences of meeting ghosts.

The first man is very happy to say:

"When I came home from work that day, I always felt that there was a cold air blowing behind me on the road. The more I walk, the more I feel wrong. I thought it might be a ghost, so I was in big trouble.

Fortunately, I am witty enough. The ghost kept blowing the air conditioner, probably freezing to death. I hurried home and leaned against the heater, only to hear a snort, and a black smoke floated out.

I felt a sort of surge of relief. I always solve this kind of ghost after the event. They say ghosts are terrible. I think so-so. "

The second man waited for the first man to finish, and then said:

"This is nothing, that summer I went to the grave with people, haven't go to the cemetery. I hit a ghost halfway. That is a female ghost in white, with fangs and blood in her eyes, not to mention how horrible it is.

But at that time, I observed that the female ghost had rough skin and rough hands. I must have been poor and had no money. I happened to have a stack of Mingbi on me at that time, which was originally intended to be burned to the tomb owner.

But I don't care so much. I threw these coins into the air. When the ghost saw the money, she couldn't walk any further. She hurried to pick up the money, and my companion and I took the opportunity to escape. It seems that this ghost is different from the poor and rich in the underworld. This ghost can't lift his legs when he sees money! "

The third person has been listening attentively to two people talking about their experiences of hitting ghosts. After the first two people finished speaking, they all turned to look at him and asked:

"Have you ever seen a ghost?"

He smiled and nodded, and the other two immediately pricked up their ears and asked him to talk about his experience of hitting a ghost. At this moment, the third person spoke, and he said:

"In fact, it's nothing, but then the ghost was killed by me."

The world's scariest joke 2 1, I went drinking with my colleagues after work, and it was almost eleven o'clock when I got home. I was worried that my wife would get angry, so I thought of pretending to be drunk and humming while patting the door. Sure enough, my wife opened the door and saw me drunk. She said nothing but helped me into the room. I'm glad I got away with it. Just lying down, my wife suddenly said, "Why are there women's stockings in your coat?" I was shocked and shouted, "Impossible, absolutely impossible ..."

Joke 2: I get toothache when I get angry, and half my face is swollen. My little niece asked me what was in my mouth. I teased her: Good thing! No matter how she asks me, I won't tell her what I ate. When I was lying on the sofa after lunch, my little niece pried my mouth open with a spoon: What did you eat?

Joke 3: Mother-in-law is going to choose vegetables to cook. When the old man saw it, he rushed forward and said, Wife, how can you do this kind of work when you are in poor health? From now on, you will stay at home and look after your grandson with melon seeds. Let someone else do this technical work. Then, then my father-in-law handed me a handful of celery while I was watching TV with melon seeds!

Joke 4. Call my husband and say, "Come and pick me up. I'm in a supermarket not far from where I work. There are two people outside, and they follow me all the way. I dare not go out ... "In a short time, my husband rushed over dressed like a big bear, calmly took off a coat and put it on me ... I smiled and asked," How do you know I'm cold ... "My husband said.

Joke 5. In the morning, the company leaders have a meeting, and we work in my brother's office. Halfway through the meeting, the leader ran to our office and shouted, "Then who, bring me that!" " "Never put off till tomorrow what you can hurry back to the meeting room. Leaving a room full of people wondering, who is who and what is what?

Joke 6: When you are sad recently, my wife is distressed. I asked: Honey, what's wrong with you recently? Are you sad all day? Me: Things at work are bothering me. Wife: As a PE teacher, what can you worry about? Me: Now many people are not good at math, and they all say that I taught them ...

Joke 7: I almost ran into a pair of old men who came by bike. I stopped half a meter away from him, but my grandfathers didn't stop and fell down. "ouch! Oh! " I apologize quickly. My uncle pointed at me and shouted, "Me, me, my leg, my leg ..." Then he felt that he had made a big disaster. What should I do? In desperation, I quickly fell down, clutching my stomach and shouting, "Oh, my child ..." Uncle was furious, "Aren't you a man? I, I, I just stutter a little ... I, I, my foot is pressing, you, you, you help me up! "

Joke 8: An old man sits on the seat in front of the bus. Seeing that he was old, the conductor was afraid that he would take the wrong bus and asked, Grandpa, where are you going? Grandpa: People's Square. Conductor: Then you are in the wrong seat. You should take the one on the left. Old man: What a bother. Say that finish sat down in the seat on the left.

Joke 9: A colleague, depending on the boss as a relative, often makes excuses to ask for leave, and the boss also asks for leave. He just asked for leave a few days ago, and the next day he wrote a leave note on the grounds of "sister-in-law getting married". This time, the boss got angry, stormed into the office and slapped the leave note on his colleague's desk: "You are talking nonsense. My daughter-in-law is getting married. Why don't I know? "

Joke 10, my colleague's husband got drunk at night and went home to climb on the bed to vomit. Colleagues grabbed her husband's hair, lifted her head and wiped her face with a towel, because she was a weak woman and had no choice. My colleague's child is 6 years old, and he says with distress: Mom, be careful, don't kill dad! Ha ha!

The scariest joke in the world. In love, you should make way for your boyfriend everywhere, let him cook, let him wash dishes and let him wash clothes to make money.

Second, the main sports of contemporary youth: send express delivery, send takeaway!

Third, after entering the society, I discovered that I can't spell my parents, but only Pinduoduo.

Fourth, women are either beautiful or hardworking. If they are beautiful and work hard, they can delay a little.

It's not the grand ideal that keeps me going, but making a lot of money and buying it at buy buy.

Six, show loving people changed wave after wave, only me, single.

Seven, some people say that I am handsome, I also laugh, because I smile more handsome.

Eight, men like beautiful faces, and women like sweet words. So women wear makeup and men lie.

If one day you suddenly think of me, please pick up your mobile phone and dial my number. No matter how busy and idle I am, as long as you say "I invite you to dinner", I will appear in front of you rain or shine. This is my lifelong commitment to my friends!

Ten, like a person to confess, don't worry so much, although the possibility of failure is very high, but what if it becomes a spare tire?

Don't call me a house girl, please call me Madame Curie.

12. Every morning, my bed tugs at me and won't let me go. It's too greasy. No, I have to find a way to cure it.

Yesterday, I went to the city to participate in the pigeon racing, but I went alone.

Fourteen, the design of the parking lot in the community is so poor that it is just like a maze. It takes a long time to find out that you don't have a car every time you go out!

Fifteen, as a girl, I can't get pregnant, but I will get pregnant.

It's windy outside today and I'm scared. I can't if everyone else is blown away. That's a real pity.

Seventeen, the crowd searched for her for thousands of Baidu and stepped on the road. Suddenly looking back and looking around, there are countless uncles and aunts. Occasionally, beautiful women patronize, or married women, and most of the rest are basically ugly.

If you feel sick and retching when brushing your teeth, don't brush your teeth in front of the mirror.

I found myself paralyzed. I tried to tell myself that I had to go to work today, but my body just didn't respond.

20. My son asked me what it was like to get married. I took his iPod, deleted all the songs except one, and set it to play indefinitely until the battery ran out.

Twenty-one, I have to go out for a walk. After all, such a good face is always hidden at home, which is a great loss to society.

Twenty-two, the so-called pig-like roommate, I should have caught a cold, let him come back and bring me a box of black and white, and he brought me a pack of Oreos.

Twenty-three, everyone else is lazy and rich, and they can sleep as late as they want. Lazy beds are short of money, so if you can save a meal, you can save one.

Twenty-four, dreaming that the object is dead, crying badly. When I woke up, I found that there was no object at all, and I cried even more.