Ask for a joke that can make people happy at once.

The tortoise saw a snail crawling slowly ... and said to him: Come on, I'll carry you ... Then ... the snail climbed up ... Soon ... the tortoise saw an ant again ... and said to him: Come up, too ... So the ant came up. When the ant appeared ... he saw the snail on it ... and said to him, Hello, do you know what the snail said? Snail said: hurry up, this turtle is so fast. .......

"I can't see things too far away," the patient said to the ophthalmologist, "Please follow me." The doctor took the patient outside and pointed to the sun in the sky. What do you think that is? ""the sun. " The patient replied, then how far do you want to see! "

One day, the animals smelled an unpleasant smell in front of Guan Gong Temple. The snake said: I am too young to fart so smelly. It must be a cow. The cow said: I eat grass, and I won't fart so smelly. The pig said: People who fart will blush. Suddenly, Guan Gong rushed out and drove the pig away, saying, How many times have I told you, I was born blushing.

One day, a man met God ... God suddenly kindly gave him a wish ... God asked ... Do you have any wishes? The man thought about it ... I heard that cats have nine lives ... Please give me nine lives ... God said ... your wish will come true one day ... That man is idle and bored ... He wants to say death ... In short, he has nine lives and is lying on the track ... As a result, a train passes by ... that man is still dead ... Why? Because that train has 10 cars. ......

One day, three people were sent to the funeral home. Strangely, their smiles after death are all ... The funeral home manager asked pol.ice: Why do their faces change after death? The policeman said: It's a long story ... Look at the man on the left ... He and his wife are in the spring night ... at the most passionate moment ... He can't stand it ... The administrator replied: Alas ... I'd rather die in the flowers ... Being a ghost is also very romantic. Policeman: The one in the middle ... Oh, he ... is really a human tragedy ... He was walking on the road ... Suddenly, he heard that he won the first prize ... the prize was over 700 million yuan ... When he was laughing happily ... he was hit by an oncoming car ... and then he died ... Policeman: ... It's a pity that this one died ... He was killed while climbing a tree. The administrator replied: ... this is a bit wrong. Why did he laugh when he was struck by lightning? ... the policeman said: because he thought ... after climbing the tree, suddenly a flash of lightning ... he thought. .........

I heard that a toad jumped out of Taihu Lake today and was run over by a car. I've been worried. I'll text you right away. If you are still alive, please reply to me!

Jianghu knows that you are skilled in martial arts, but you can't be proud. If you do this, you will no longer be a person, but a swordsman! Chivalrous swordsman! Chivalrous swordsman!

You are as hardworking as a bee, as beautiful as a butterfly, as loyal as a puppy, as smart as a kitten, as simple and honest as an old cow and as fierce as a tiger. No wonder people call you an animal!

Whether it is a gust of wind or not, it is so eternal; This is a dream, but it is so real; You bowed your head and said nothing, but I couldn't calm down. Finally, I can't help but say to you, "let me know before farting!" "

Without the wind, the clouds will not move; Fish can't swim without water; If there is no sun, the moon will have no light; If it weren't for you, stupid people wouldn't exist.

I am a lonely tree, standing on the roadside for thousands of years, waiting alone, just because one day you pass me, I will fall for you, and it is in vain not to smash you.

Beggars beg along the street with monkeys. He told them to laugh, cry, bow and read short messages.

You took part in a ball game the other day and only scored a volley ball. Before the goalkeeper could react, the goal was scored! We all applaud and cheer for you. You get up and pat your ass and say, damn, the ground is too slippery!

When you pick up the mirror and look at your round face, high nose, charming eyes, sexy mouth and blessed ears, you will sigh loudly-pig!

The aquarium celebrated the birthday of the old dragon king. During the dinner, Prime Minister Turtle took something out of his arms, looked at it and put it back. The dragon king quickly asked, what happened to Prime Minister Gui? Shrimp, soldier and crab will quickly answer: the old bastard has received the text message again.

My friend thought a lot last night, so did I. Only you are the coolest. In my dream, I searched for you for thousands of Baidu. Looking back, you are still tied to the depths of someone else's donkey shed, cruel! Cruel! Calm down after reading the information!

Are you free tomorrow afternoon? I want to find you. Can you pick me up at the station? However, I'm afraid it's hard for people to recognize it. You let your head explode, with a stick in your right hand and a porcelain bowl in your left. The joint signal is: Come on!

I dreamed about you. You made a dress out of white clouds, borrowed the wings of a bird, put the broom behind your ass, and flew to me like a sword. Tell me affectionately: Do you know? That's what birdman looks like.

I thought there was something better, but I found again and again that the best was around, just like you. I didn't think so at first, but as time went on, I realized that you were the best … bully!

When I arrived in xishuangbanna tourism, Yunnan, I was besieged by a group of wild boar. Tourists took out food and money, and the wild boar was unmoved. You took out your only ID card, and the pigs knelt down and cried: Boss, we found you!

You are a 10 playboy, who often plays with 9 and 8 and has billions of money. You've been abandoned for seven years, and you've been looking for prey. You need to ask more questions, but you are still half-hearted. You are definitely not a good person.

After seeing the Three Kingdoms, the tiger went to catch wild boar. He saw that there were no pigs in the pigsty, so he touched his beard and said, Empty city plan! I turned around and saw a dead pig on the animal trap. I was shocked: danger! Suddenly seeing you again, I was overjoyed: yo-ho, there is a honey trap!

The toad chased the swan, and the swan said disdainfully, if I were like this, I would have died long ago! Toad refused: Is the pig still alive? Hearing this, the pig felt wronged: I provoked whoever I recruited, I was just reading the text message!

There is a yearning, a love, a beauty, an agreement, and a greeting, hello pig!

I don't want to be alone I want it, too. I walk in the street and have a look. Handsome men and beautiful women hold hands, but I hold hands with my left hand. Now I just want to go out with you, but I'm afraid my friend will say, don't always walk the dog.

I miss the days we walked together. Spring is beautiful, birds are singing and flowers are fragrant. Everyone in the village praises you for your beauty and cuteness. The villagers also praised me for being smart and capable, and I came out to release pigs at such a young age.