My poetry has been seriously abused. How can fate be so unfair to me? I've been a nobody all my life. I can't stand it.

1

My poem was severely criticized in the newspaper. How can fate be so unfair to me? I've been a nobody all my life. I can't stand it. It is really a trick!

2

I grabbed my hat, threw away the newspaper, and ran to Broadway. A large group of people flocked to the circus beside the street happily. The performance has just begun. It is said that circus clowns are famous for their excellent performances.

three

After a while, my old friend Standahr came to meet me.

four

Nice to meet you, Hal Si Tong, my boy. Gee, how have you been recently? There was no murder or arson, was there? Don't you have to run away? You look as if you have been stimulated!

five

"You see, right? Have you seen all the comments in the newspaper? ) "I said, thinking, of course, is related to the damn public opinion.

six

Oh, by the way, I saw a performance there this morning. Clowns are really great, and I'm sure you think so. Hartle is here. "This is hartle and this is Hal Si Tong."

seven

I don't have time and don't want to mention this embarrassing misunderstanding, so when I focused on the new face I just met (Standahr introduced him to me in a hurry), I immediately got some comfort. He is short, fat and childish, but he is lively. His face is ruddy, with a faint rural flavor, and his eyes are sincere, happy and calm. His hair reveals that he is not a mature big boy. Judging from his hair, I think he is over forty.

eight

"Standahr, come on!" He shouted excitedly to my friend, "Aren't you going to see the circus?" They say that clown is so wonderful that no one can imitate him. Come on, Mr. Si Tong. Come with us. After the circus performance, we will go to Taylor's restaurant to eat a delicious stew and drink a little wine. "

nine

This new friend is quite unusual, rich in connotation, humorous, ruddy and sincere. He had a magical influence on me. Accepting such a sincere and friendly invitation is just like human beings being loyal to their own nature.

10

When watching the circus, I paid more attention to hartle than the famous clown. I'm totally attracted to her. I was deeply impressed by the real happiness he conveyed. It seems that he has been repeating the jokes told by the clown, as if he has been tasting delicious food over and over again. His dancing and dancing expressed his fanatical pursuit of the circus. If he feels that any of his reactions are different from ordinary people, he will look back at Standahr and me to see if we can understand the happiness he shared. In a 40-year-old man, I saw the shadow of a boy of 12 years old. However, my respect for him has not diminished at all.

Because all the performance of Hutt Bohr is so real and unpretentious, and every word and behavior is so decent. It also carries a kind of pure and beautiful character, so Hutt Bohr's great childlike innocence carries such a sacred and immortal spirit, just like the eternal youth of the Greek god.

1 1

However, no matter how much I pay attention to hector Bohr and admire his temperament, the bad mood that started when I rushed out of the house has not completely disappeared, and it will be disturbed by them from time to time. From these recurring bad emotions, I finally woke up and quickly turned my attention to Broadway Circus, where the audience showed great love and appreciation for the circus. Listen! Applause, stomping, noisy cheers; Many viewers seem to be fascinated by this; I mused, what caused these cheers? The clown just grinned funny and caused everyone to cheer?

12

Then the wonderful part of my poem "Greek gods can support the justice brought by war" kept reappearing in my mind. Yes, yes, I thought, if I run into the circus now and repeat my part, oh no, I interpret the whole tragic poem in front of them, will they cheer for me as a poet as a clown? No, they just shush me. They will only call me an old fool or a madman. What does this prove? Am I narcissistic or are they ignorant? Maybe both, but there is no doubt that it is the former. But why do I think so? Do I want them to appreciate my poems like clowns? Recall what an Athenian said. When he cheered loudly in public, the Athenian would quietly ask his friend, what stupid words did he just say?

13

Once again, I turned my eyes to the circus performance, and my eyes fell on the radiant Hutton's face. Obviously, this kind of pure happiness is simply a contempt for those people I despise. My paranoid pride was accused. However, hartle can't imagine that his smile criticized me like magic. At that moment, I felt severe criticism, his happy expression, his waving hand, and he raised his voice triumphantly because the energetic clown told another joke.

14

After the circus performance, we went to Taylor's restaurant. We sat at a small marble table and ordered a pot of stew and a little wine. Hutt Bohr sat opposite me. Although he can calm down from the carnival just now, his face still smells of happiness. However, there is another feature that was not so obvious before: it shows a certain calm and calm judgment. His good judgment and sense of humor were mobilized. His conversation with Standahr is still going on, so I seldom say anything. I am more and more attracted by his good judgment. In most of the topics he discussed, Hert Bohr seems to be able to directly find the exact boundary between enthusiasm and indifference. Obviously, when he looks at the world objectively, he will not blindly follow the theory to demonstrate the black and white of the world. Putting aside all thoughts, he only accepts the facts. He will not easily reject the bad side, will not demonize the good side with a pessimistic attitude, and will be happy to accept and be grateful for all the good and bad. Obviously, at least at that time, there was neither emotional defect nor ideological defect in his happiness.

15

It suddenly occurred to him that he had another appointment, so he picked up his hat, bowed to us in a friendly way and left.

16

Hey, Hal Si Tong, what do you think of your new friend? Standahr said, knocking on the marble table.

17

These last two words have special meanings.

18

"It really opened my eyes," I repeated. "Standahr, I really appreciate you introducing him to me. This is one of the most extraordinary people I have ever met. I really have to see it with my own eyes to know that there is such a person. "

19

"You seem to like him," Standahr sarcastically with a straight face.

20

"I really like and envy him! Standahr, I wish I were hartle! "

2 1

Huh? What a pity! But there is only one Hutton in this world.

22

This sentence once again made me lost in thought and inexplicably provoked the dark emotions in my heart.

23

I sneered angrily: "His happiness comes from his just right temperament and a little bit of good luck. He has good judgment, which everyone can see. However, good judgment does not mean that he is brilliant. No, it is because he has no talent that he has such judgment. Also, having happiness is precisely because of lack of talent. It is because of the lack of talent that Hutt was blessed by God.

24

Huh? Don't you think he is an extraordinary genius?

25

What? ! Genius? ! Can such a short and fat guy be called a genius? ! Genius should be as tall and thin as cassius. That's right.

26

Huh? Can't you imagine that Hutton was once very talented, but he was lucky enough to get rid of it and finally gain weight?

27

It is impossible and unrealistic to let a genius get rid of his talent, just like to let a tuberculosis patient recover.

28

"ah? You are so absolute! "

29

I'm even angrier. I said loudly, "That's it, Standahr." Your happy Bohr the Hutt is not a role model for you and me after all. It is because of his mediocre qualifications and simple mind that his ideas are so simple and clear; It is precisely because of his weak general ability that his emotions are so easy to control; It is because of him that he is born perfect and so happy. Think about it, how can a confident man like you and an ambitious dreamer like me become a model that satisfies us? Nothing can drive him beyond his bottom line, and he can't do anything else to restrain himself better. From the appearance, he has been exempted from all the harm of moral standards. If he had been inspired by ambition, if he had been affirmed by others, even once, if he had been despised, Hutton would have changed a lot, at least he would not be like this. From birth to death, he naturally lived a stable life. There is no doubt that he can only be an ordinary person in this life.

30

"Ah?"

3 1

"Why do you always say' ah' to me in surprise after I finish?"

32

"Have you heard of Betty, the team leader?"

33

"He is a great British genius. A long time ago, his outstanding performance in replacing Sidons and Kembles in drury lane made the whole town applaud and cheer for him crazily. "

34

Standahr said, "Same." He knocked on the marble table again.

35

I looked at him puzzled. He looks mysterious. He seemed to understand the main points of our conversation, but expressed his views in a very subtle way. He seems to know Betty, which makes me more confused.

36

"What is the relationship between the talented 12-year-old British boy Betty and the ordinary 40-year-old American Hutball?"

37

"Oh, they have nothing to do with each other. I don't think they have met. Betty may have died before that. "

38

"Crossing the ocean, why bother a dead person and mention him in real life?"

39

"Well, forget it, I'm deeply sorry. Then go on with your opinion of Huttbauer. You think he has no talent and is easy to satisfy, which is why he is so happy and fat. Is that why you think he is not a role model for ordinary people? Don't those who forget their own virtues, neglected geniuses, and those who are condemned for useless ideas gain some valuable experience? In fact, these three types of people are the same thing. You appreciate his happiness, but despise his mediocrity. Poor hartle! It's incredible that your happiness makes you despised! "

40

I'm not saying that I despise him. It's unfair of you to say so. I just want to express that he is not my role model.

4 1

Suddenly, there was a noise beside me, which caught my attention. I looked back and saw hartle again. He was happy to sit back in the seat where he had just left.

Forty two.

"I'm going to be late for an appointment, so I want to come back and continue to chat with you. Come on, you've been sitting long enough. Why don't you go to my place for five minutes? "

43

"If you promise to play the violin for us, we will go."

Forty-four

Hum, he is also a violinist! ? No wonder today's geniuses don't want to see how violinists play (fast or slow) (because even people with average qualifications like Hutton can be considered violinists), which makes me even more unhappy.

45

"I am willing to play the violin until you are satisfied. Come on! "

46

A few minutes later, we arrived at a street near Broadway. We walked into a house that looked a bit like a warehouse and went up to the fifth floor. There are all kinds of strange furniture here, which seems to be bought bit by bit from the auction of outdated household items, but it is remarkable that these furniture look quite clean and comfortable.

47

Standahr urged Hutton Bohr to play the violin for us, so Hutton immediately took out his dented old violin, sat on a rickety high stool, played Yankee songs and chatted with some free and light tunes. Although the music is ordinary, I am deeply fascinated by this miraculous melody. He sat on an old stool, with a rusty hat crooked on his head and one foot hanging in the air. He pulled the magic bow back and forth. At this moment, all my bad emotions, even a little residual bad emotions, disappeared, and even my original bad emotions surrendered to this magical violin.

48

"How do you feel? Isn't it a bit like orpheus? Huh? " Standahr gave me a naughty push on my left lower rib.

Forty nine

"I think it's like an enchanted bear." I muttered to myself.

50

The playing of the violin stopped. I was even more curious about him, so I once again focused on this expressionless Huttbauer, and at this time he just showed an expression that he didn't want to answer anything.

5 1

After we left, Standahr and I stood in that street again. I sincerely begged Standahr to tell me who the great hartle was.

Fifty two

"oh! Haven't you seen him? Why do you ask me who he is? When Taylor was in the restaurant, he was sitting opposite you, and he was in front of you. Isn't that clear enough? I really don't understand what else you want to know. There is no doubt that your own keen insight has long reached the realm of omniscience. "

53

"Standahr, you don't make fun of me, you must have something to hide from me. Please tell me, who is hector Bohr? "

54

"What an extraordinary genius, Hal Si Tong." Standahr suddenly told me enthusiastically. "He became famous when he was young. He performed from one city to another, and each performance was unprecedented. At one time, even the wise men marveled at his talent, even the loveliest people liked him, and he also won the appreciation and love of thousands of ordinary people in Qian Qian. However, he is now walking on Broadway, where people and cars come and go. He walked on the road, shoulder to shoulder with pedestrians like you and me. He has won many honors, what a charming celebrity he is, but now, as you can see, he just wears a beaver sweater casually. Once he had a lot of good luck, his violin playing brought him a lot of money, and he won as many honors as good luck. Now, in order to make a living, he hurriedly teaches people to play the violin from door to door every day. Once he was famous; Now, his reputation is ruined and he is humorous. He is very talented, but he is not burdened by fame. He is happier than the king now and more like a genius than before. "

55

"Then what is his real name?"

Fifty-six

"Put your ear closer and I'll tell you in a low voice."

57

"no! Standahr, when I was a child, I used to cheer for him in the theater until I lost my voice. "

58

"I also heard that people's recognition of your poems is not very deep." Standahr suddenly changed the subject.

59

"For God's sake! Don't mention that again! " I shouted. "If Cicero travels to the East, he can find some comfort when he sees those once prosperous cities destroyed; Then when I saw that Hutt's hall of fame had collapsed, but his heart was still full of flowers, and he was still very talented and connotative, my little things were not worth mentioning.

60

The next day, I tore up all the manuscripts, bought myself a violin, and then learned the violin from Hutton regularly.