Literary jokes

One day at noon, Su Dongpo went to visit an old monk. The old monk is busy cooking. Just as he brought the cooked fish to the table, he heard the young monk report that Mr. Su Dongpo was visiting. The monk was afraid of revealing the secret of eating fish, so he was anxious and gained wisdom. He put the fish in his mouth and hurried out to meet the guests. Both of them went to the meditation room for tea. When Su Dongpo was drinking tea, he smelled the smell of fish and saw the upside-down chin on the table. Because Qing is a percussion instrument used by monks to do Buddhism. Usually, the mouth is up, but today it is buckled backwards. There must be something wrong. Then the old monk said, "The lay man is here today. what do you think? Su Dongpo deliberately played a joke on the old monk, pretending to be serious, and said, "I met a difficult problem today, so I came to consult my predecessors." The old monk quickly folded his hands and said, "Amitabha, how dare you?" Su Dongpo said with a smile, "Today, my friend wrote a couplet. The first couplet is "Xiangyangmen is always in spring", and the second couplet I can't get next time. I hope everyone can give me advice. The old monk didn't know it was a scam. He blurted out: "A man of great talent, a layman, is rich in learning." Why is he so forgetful today? This is an old couplet, and the bottom line is "gathering good people to celebrate the rest." Su Dongpo couldn't help laughing: "Since my predecessors made it clear that" Qing (Qing) has fish (surplus) ",then I will feast my eyes! 」

Once upon a time, there was a rich boy named Shi. He knows a little literature, but he wants to promote it everywhere, so everyone in the village hates him. One day, Shi Xiucai saw a dead chicken behind the wall and wanted to show off his literature. He blurted out, "Fine feather birds die." Then a man couldn't look past and said to him, "I can't make a pair, but I have a pair." You don't think it is suitable for your pair, thin and thick, feather and hair, home and wild, bird and beast, brick and stone, later and first, death and life. " Mr. Shi just said, "Mr. Shi, coarse-haired beast." Ran away in the laughter of everyone.

Once upon a time, there was a landlord who had three daughters who were married to a scholar, a blacksmith and a blacksmith. It is said that the third son-in-law came to celebrate the birthday of the landlord. At the banquet, the landlord suddenly asked several son-in-law to write some poems for his birthday. The title of this poem is a swift horse in the landlord's stable. In fact, the landlord looked down on his third son-in-law, knowing that he was a lout, and wanted him to make a fool of himself in front of others.

The eldest son-in-law pondered the fragment and said, "I have one." Then he shook his head and said, "The snow is like goose feathers, and the horse will take the south bridge. When the fast horse returns, the goose feathers float in the water. " Father-in-law praised again and again and said, "OK, let's run back. Snowflakes are still on the water, not bad. "

The second son-in-law was not convinced and said, "I have it again." He said, "Throw an iron bar into the water and the trotters will run to Tokyo. The fast horse is back, but the iron bar is still not heavy. " The landlord shook his head and said, "Not as good as the boss."

The third son-in-law blushed long ago, and her neck was thick, and she didn't say anything at the moment. The landlord squinted and asked, "Can't you see?" Say that finish suddenly put a fart. The third son-in-law suddenly patted his thigh and shouted, "Yes!"

Listen to him: "my father-in-law farted and went west at once." The fast horse is back and the fart door is still open. "

The landlord is dizzy!