Humorous SMS 200 points! I want to tell her one a day, so please try your best to help!

1 stupid man+stupid woman = get married; Stupid man+smart woman = divorce; Smart man+stupid woman = extramarital affairs; Smart man+smart woman = romantic love; we?

Think of your smile when I get up, smell your smell when I wash my face, and you are my need before going to bed. I really can't forget you ... my dear toilet!

I'm ugly but I'm gentle, I'm thin but I'm full of sinews, I'm soft-hearted but my legs are not short. I believe I can catch up with you, even to the ends of the earth.

I don't know how you are today, but my situation is not good. I just feel that you have been buzzing, left and right, in my mind. Do you miss me?

5 women-before engagement, like swallows, they can fly as they like. After the engagement, she can fly like a dove, but dare not fly far. After marriage, like a duck, I want to fly, but I can't fly.

Nothing, I just miss you suddenly. It was only for a moment that I thought of you. In this emotional year, I just said, I like you. I miss you very much now.

You are a sentimental crow; You are a lively frog; You are a sweet potato that grows in the mud, and you don't touch it; You are the fiery prawn in my heart; I want to greet you gently ... little fool who read my message: Are you happy today?

If your eyes blink, I will die. If your eyes blink again, I will come back to life. If your eyes keep blinking, I will die!

If you were a flower, I would like to be that cow dung; If you are cow dung, I would like to be that fly. If you were a fly, I would like to make an egg with a seam. If you are an egg, I would like to make tea. If, you are tea

10 love is a feeling, even if it is painful, you will feel happy. Love is an experience, even if it is heartbreaking, it will feel sweet. Love is an experience, even if it is broken, you will feel beautiful.

1 1 Marry me, and I will flush your toilet with oil, bathe you with Pepsi, and pick you up from work with Boeing 777. Promise me?

12 Do you love me? If you love it, read the short message ........................................................................! I know you love me, and I will seriously consider you!

13 forgive me for giving your mobile phone number to a stranger. His name is Cupid. He said he would help me tell you: My heart likes you, my heart cares about you, and my heart is waiting for you.

It takes a minute to meet someone, an hour to like someone and a day to love someone, but it takes me a lifetime to forget you.

15 man-before engagement, be obedient like a grandson. After engagement, learn to talk back like a son. Give orders like Lao Zi after marriage.

16' s wife runs stably like China Telecom, but she can't get it out; Xiaomi moves like China, which is convenient and fast, but it costs a lot of money. Fans, like China Unicom, feel very fresh, but often stop.

I left a suicide note: I struggled all night but I couldn't pierce your face. Your face is so thick that I have no face to live in the world, Lord! Please forgive him, I killed myself!

You are beautiful and moving. When you turn around, ghosts frown, when you turn around, when you are dumb for a thousand years, when you turn around, when Tai Sen changes table tennis, when you turn around, when Yang Guo falls in love with Li Mochou, when you turn around, when you turn around, the monk will use joy!

Look at the bank abbreviation: China Construction Bank CBC (deposit or not? ) Bank of China BC (No deposit! ) Agricultural Bank of China Agricultural Bank of China (Oh, don't save! ) ICBC (love to save) Minsheng CMSB (save silly waves? )

Marriage: poor family background, primary school education, rural hukou, a shabby house with three thin acres of land, and a wife with a cold pot and a hot stove. Never leave your mouth all year round. I want to hold hands with my girlfriend by text message today. Would you like to?

A drunk said to his wife, our house is haunted! When I went to the toilet just now, the light came on as soon as I opened the door, and a gust of wind blew out. His wife slapped him and said, this is the third time you got drunk and peed in the refrigerator!

In the restaurant. Woman: Will you marry me? Male silence. W: Don't think that nobody wants me. If I am angry, I will find someone to marry here! The waiter came over: Miss, you scared away all the guests in our shop.

Actor A anxiously looks for the director: Didn't you say that I should play the role of Wu Dalang? Why did you change people again? The director said impatiently, How many times have I told you that you are not tall enough to play Wu Dalang?

A man managed to put his luggage on the plane. The stewardess asked, do you always carry such heavy luggage? M: Not next time! Next time it's my turn to hide in the box, my companion will buy a ticket.

A girl wrote to her boyfriend in the distance: honey, don't write to me again. Neighbors think that postman is my boyfriend. ...

In the middle of the night, Bush saw bin Laden standing in front of his bed with long hair. Bush was startled and said, How dare you break into the White House at night! Bin Laden shook his chest-high beard and said with a grimace, "It's so soft and confident!"!

Mr. and Mrs. Harry are fishing by the river while Mrs. Harry is nagging. Soon, a fish was hooked. Mrs Harry: What a poor fish! Mr. Harry: If it shuts up, it's all right!

Personals: Male, undergraduate, only a few points away; Working in a multinational organization, McDonald's cleans the table; Have a house, many people own it; Have a car, not a motor vehicle; Looking for a beautiful young man * * * went to the grave, a few years later.

Yesterday, I let a mosquito find you, let it tell you that I miss you very much, and let it kiss you for me, because now I can't get close to you! It will tell you how much I miss you! You asked me how much I love you? A pimple represents my heart!

I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, the snow in the north of Saibei. Sorry, it's stuck.

You and I are both one-winged angels. Only by embracing each other can we spread our wings and fly. It is said that people come into the world to find the other half, and I finally found you after a lot of hardships, damn it! Only to find that our wings are on the same side.

A three-year-old boy took the hand of a three-year-old girl and said, "I love you." The little girl said, "Can you be responsible for my future?" The little boy said, "Of course! We are not children for a year or two! "

The mother mouse suspected the male mouse was having an affair, so she followed him one day. The male rat got into the grass, and then a stinging accusation came out. The mother mouse grabbed the thorn and accused her of not having an affair. Say it! Who are you trying to seduce by playing so much mousse?

Destiny is an unchangeable oath before the reincarnation of this life. Fate is a happy agreement that you and I once said. Fate is a beautiful dream, a dream that we human beings can meet again. Ape dung is the poo of monkeys.

The priest saw several fairy models in the window of a department store, with exquisite curves and wearing cicada gauze nightgowns. He sighed and said, if the angel is like this, the heaven will be in chaos!

I won't miss you because of the changing seasons, and I won't forget you because I'm busy. How are you doing in the zoo? Did the tiger bully you? Did the lion scare you? The monkey didn't rob your food, did he? Are you still used to reading text messages with your mobile phone in both feet?