A long English joke

Lead: In fact, learning English can also be very interesting. The key is how to learn. I collected some long English jokes for you. I hope you like them.

Peter joined the army when he was eight years old. In a few months, he was taught how to be a good soldier. He is good at everything except shooting. One day, he and his friends were practicing shooting. Except Peter, they all did well. After he shot at the target nine times but didn't hit it once, the officer who tried to teach the young soldier to shoot said, "Peter, you are hopeless!" Don't waste your last bullet! Go behind that wall and shoot yourself with it! "

Peter felt ashamed. He walked behind the wall, and a few seconds later, officers and other young soldiers heard gunshots.

"Oh, my God!" The officer said. "Did that stupid man really shoot himself?"

He ran anxiously behind the wall, but Peter was safe and sound. "I'm sorry, sir," he said, "but I missed again."

Peter joined the army at eighteen. He needs to attend several months of study to become an excellent soldier. Peter is good at other things, but he can't shoot. One day, he practiced shooting with his friends. Except for Peter, everyone else had no problem. He fired nine shots and missed the target once. At this time, the instructor who taught the recruits to shoot said, "Peter, you look hopeless." Don't waste the last bullet! " Go behind the wall and shoot yourself with it. "

Peter felt very ashamed. He walked behind the wall. A few minutes later, instructors and recruits heard a gunshot.

"Oh, my God!" The instructor cried, "Did that idiot really shoot himself?" ? "

He quickly hid behind the wall and found Peter safe and sound. "I'm sorry, sir," he said. "I still missed."

Four best friends met in the hospital because they all had children. The nurse came up to the first man and said, "Congratulations, you have twins." The man said, "It's strange that I'm the manager of the Minnesota Twins." After a while, the nurse came to the second man and said, "Congratulations, you gave birth to triplets." Men are like, "Well, strange, I'm the director of three musketeers." Finally, the nurse walked up to the third person and said

"Congratulations, you have twins x2." The man was very happy and said, "Ironically, I work for a hotel" for four seasons. "All three of them were happy until they saw their last partner jumping around, cursing God and banging his head against the wall. They asked him what happened, and he replied, "What happened? I work for 7-up!

Four good friends met in the hospital, and their wives were having a baby. The nurse came to the first man and said, "Congratulations, you gave birth to twins." The man said, "It's strange that I'm the manager of the Minnesota Twins." After a while, the nurse came to the second man and said, "Congratulations, you gave birth to triplets." Men like it very much: "Well, what a coincidence. I .. you got two pairs of twins. " The man said happily, "That's ridiculous. I work in the Four Seasons Hotel." All three of them were happy, but the fourth partner was as anxious as ants on hot bricks, cursing God and banging his head against the wall. They asked him what happened, and he replied, "What happened? I work in 7-up! "

In the traffic court of a big city in the midwest, a young lady was brought before the judge to respond to the ticket she received for running a red light. She explained to the judge that she was a school teacher and asked that her case be dealt with immediately so that she could go to class as soon as possible. There was a flash of fanaticism in the judge's eyes. "You are a school teacher, huh?" He said. "Madam, I will realize my lifelong ambition. Sit at that table and write' I ran a red light' 500 times. "

In the traffic court of a big city in the midwest, a young lady was brought before the judge. She was given a ticket for running a red light. The lady explained to the judge that she was a school teacher and asked the judge to deal with her case immediately so that she could go back to class. The judge flashed a sly look and said, "Are you a school teacher?" Madam, I'm about to realize my lifelong dream. Sit at that table and write' I ran a red light' 500 times. "

;