Classical Chinese Translation of Work-related Jokes

1. In the same year, two scholars recommended the translation of Bizhi.

A was elected to imperial academy, and B was the county magistrate. One day, A showed off to B and said, "I am in a noble and lofty department, close to the Forbidden Palace. Brother Nian, my qualifications are far from you. " .

If nothing else, just choose a big copybook (business card) for the visiting guests. Our identity is decent, which is far from the secular. "B said," How many words can you use in your post? Isn't the word on the notice of our county government much bigger than your post? Everyone in the street knows that no ordinary person dares to obey respectfully. Brother nian, what's the use of that thing? "

A said, "So I have a golden melon yellow cover, which is awesome. Do you, brother? " B said, "Bro, when I went out, I avoided the' mighty' sign to clear the way, and the guards were lined up all over the street. How many times more than the younger brother? " Jia said, "The seal of Taishi Gong, whose name is recorded in the royal family, can you not envy your brother?" B said, "Brother, I have a decree, and only I can control it. Look, brother Nian, you are in the cold yamen, and the seals are all privately carved. Who is afraid of you? " A couldn't help feeling a little exhausted, so he said, "In short, Hanlin's voice is worth 1000 yuan." B smiled and said, "When I was sitting in the lobby, people kept calling me' God', which was only worth 1000 yuan?" .

2. In the same year, two scholars gave a translation of Bizhi.

A was elected to imperial academy, and B was the county magistrate. One day, A showed off to B and said, "I am in a noble and lofty department, close to the Forbidden Palace. Brother Nian, my qualifications are far from you. " .

If nothing else, just choose a big copybook (business card) for the visiting guests. Our identity is decent, which is far from the secular. "B said," How many words can you use in your post? Isn't the word on the notice of our county government much bigger than your post? Everyone in the street knows that no ordinary person dares to obey respectfully. Brother nian, what's the use of that thing? "

A said, "So I have a golden melon yellow cover, which is awesome. Do you, brother? " B said, "Bro, when I went out, I avoided the' mighty' sign to clear the way, and the guards were lined up all over the street. How many times more than the younger brother? " Jia said, "The seal of Taishi Gong, whose name is recorded in the royal family, can you not envy your brother?" B said, "Brother, I have a decree, and only I can control it. Look, brother Nian, you are in the cold yamen, and the seals are all privately carved. Who is afraid of you? " A couldn't help feeling a little exhausted, so he said, "In short, Hanlin's voice is worth 1000 yuan." B smiled and said, "When I was sitting in the lobby, people kept calling me' God', which was only worth 1000 yuan?" .

3. Wei Guanzhi's real name is pure classical Chinese translation Wei Guanzhi, whose real name is pure, was born in Jingzhao, Tang Dynasty. Mao Wei's brother, Prime Minister Tang Xianzong. Avoid xian zong, avoid words. Wu and Wei Guanzhong were promoted to Jinshi in the same year. At the beginning of Zhenyuan, Tang Dezong was a scholar and was appointed as the principal. Wu worshiped the assistant minister's door, and Wei stopped Chang 'an to choose. Yuan Heng thought the city of ten thousand years. On the day of the church, Yuan Heng thanked him and said, "Someone met his ancestors in the same year, and Yuan Heng lived here. Make ancestors leave no dust, Yuan Heng's sin ". In crying and tears. In the next few months, except for the vacancy. That year, Yuan Heng was very handsome, surprisingly handsome. Shun Zongyongzhen hated to move to Shangshu Youcheng, and when Xian Zongzhu was in charge of politics, the official was the same as Zhongshu. Promulgated on the same day as Guan Yu (out of the "Continued Life Record"). Move to Zhongshu assistant minister, only for the official department assistant minister, Mu Zongchao for the Ministry of Industry ministers. At the age of sixty-two, I gave the right servant an injection, saying that he was virtuous, and later said that he was a writer.

Explanation:

Wei Chun was born in Jingzhao, Tang Dynasty. Mao Wei's younger brother, Tang Xianzong's prime minister. Because it is also called "Chun" (Chun Li), in order to avoid taboo, I changed my name to "Zi". Wu and Wei Guanzhong were scholars in the same year. At the beginning of Zhenyuan in Tang Dezong, he was awarded the title of "Primary School Student". Wu worshipped as an assistant minister under the door, Wei Guanzhong stepped down as a "Chang 'an Wei" and went to Beijing to wait for his post, and Wu was appointed as a "Wannian County Cheng". On the same day, when he won the Jinshi and met with the Prime Minister, Wu apologized and said, "I am the same age as my ancestors, and my fate is balanced. Let me make up for this position. As a result, my ancestors failed to reproduce, and Yuan Heng was guilty. " Wei Guanzhong stepped down in tears. In the next few months, he was appointed as "vacant". That year, he became "surprisingly handsome" Wu. Emperor Shunzong Yongzhen was promoted to "Shangshu Youcheng" and Xianzong was appointed as "Tongshu Officer". He was appointed on the same day as Wei Guanzhi (according to the record of renewal). Later, he was appointed assistant minister of Zhongshu, assistant minister of the official department, and Mu Zongshi was the minister of the Ministry of Industry. He died at the age of sixty-two. After his death, he was given a letter to a suitable servant to shoot him. He took him as "Zhen" and later changed it to "Wen"? .

4. The more translators, the better the plaque. A man boasted that he could get into Imperial High School and said, "I dream at night, and someone plays drum music to give me a plaque."

His friend said, "I also dreamed that someone gave you a plaque with four words written on it: outrageous." I'm afraid someone grew up in a rich family and spent money to buy a five-product official, but they don't know the sufferings of the people.

One winter, he went out to inspect. I saw a beggar standing shivering in the cold wind.

He felt very strange and asked his entourage, "Why is this person always moving?" The waiter said, "It's cold and my clothes are thin. I'm shivering." The man was even more surprised and said, "Isn't it cold to shake?" A rich man bought a barrel of wine and put a seal on the lid. His servant drilled a hole in the bottom of the barrel and stole wine every day. The rich man was surprised to find that the seal was complete, but the amount of wine was getting less and less every day. It is suggested that he check the bottom of the bucket to see if there are any defects. The rich man replied, "You are a fool, but there is not enough wine above and there is no wine below.".

A man was invited to dinner. When the host poured wine, he only poured half a cup at a time. The man said to his master, "You have a saw at home. Please lend it to me." The host asked, "What's the use of borrowing it?" The guest pointed to the cup and said, "Since the top half of this cup can't hold wine, it should be sawed off. What's the use of keeping it? " Two friends who have invested in brewing together are going to brew together. A said to B, "You give food and I'll give water." B said, "I can pay for the meal. After drinking it, how can I divide the profits?" A said, "I will never let you suffer." After drinking, I just want water, and the rest is yours. "

Zhang Youyu, who guessed the riddle of Wumen, aroused the curiosity of gifted scholars. Every day, there are intruders who pretend to be riddles and stick them on the door: "If you hit it, you can enter." Mystery cloud: "old but not old, small but not small;" Don't be embarrassed, okay. "

There is nothing in it; Wang Gubai shoots a cloud: "The squire is 80 years old when he meets King Wen; Gan Luo twelve as prime minister, small not small; It is shameful to swallow it alone after closing the door; Open the door for everyone to eat, okay? " Zhang laughed.

A man was ordered to deliver an urgent document, and the boss specially gave him a fast horse. Isn't it faster? But he just ran after the horse.

Passers-by asked him, "Since it's so urgent, why not ride a horse?" He said, "Isn't it faster to walk with six feet than with four feet?" Willing to die, there was an emperor who loved playing the piano, but he played it so badly that the civil servants and queens in the Qing Dynasty could not stand his piano sound. The emperor searched the whole court, but he couldn't find a bosom friend.

He ordered a condemned man to be released from prison. The emperor promised: "As long as you say I play the piano well, I can save you from death."

Unexpectedly, the emperor had just played half the piano when the death row shouted, "Please don't play, I am willing to die!" " "Pick up the straw rope someone committed theft and was locked up by the government. Someone asked him, "What big crime did you commit?" He sighed: "A person is unlucky and walks against the board.

I happened to see a straw rope in the street yesterday. I thought it would be useful in the future, so I picked it up

"The questioner asked," Is it so heavy to pick up a straw rope? " I only heard the prisoner continue to say, "I didn't know there was a cow tied to the end of the straw rope!" "Salt bean family is very stingy when they are wealthy businessmen.

He put the pickled beans in a bottle and put a few in each meal with chopsticks. He was having dinner that day. Suddenly, someone told him, "Your son is eating big fish and meat in a restaurant!" " Hearing this, the rich merchant scolded, "Who have I worked so hard to save?" Then pour a handful of salt beans from the bottle, put them all in your mouth, chew and say, "I lost, too!" " "Like father, like son, there was a man who was arrogant and never let others.

One day, he was walking in the street, and a man came and didn't make way for him. Of course he wouldn't let him, so the two men stood face to face.

After a long time, the man's father came to him and asked him anxiously, "Why are you still standing here? Everyone in the family is waiting for you to buy food and cook!" " ""I can't go, this man won't make way for me! " "That you go to buy rice, I stand here to show you, who finally give way to who! "JVG words A scholar met a monk. The scholar thought of the monk's ugliness and asked him, "Master, how do you write the bald words of a bald donkey?" The monk said, "this is just a scholar's beautiful words." * * * just slightly bent. "This is the Passover.

A newly married couple didn't understand complicated holiday etiquette, so the husband asked his wife to peek at the blacksmith's house next door. The wife approached the window and saw the blacksmith hitting her with a coal shovel! When his wife came home, her husband asked her what she saw, but she wouldn't say.

Finally, the husband got angry and picked up a coal shovel to hit her. She cried and said, "Since you know all about it, why did you send me?" Monks should use blood to repel mosquitoes.

When there were a lot of mosquitoes, the monk couldn't stand it, so he beat around with his hands. People nearby asked, "Why do you want to feed mosquitoes?" The monk said, "They ate and ate, so they should fight."

The story of a scholar-a scholar took an extremely good student to catch the exam. I lost my hat on the way.

The extreme boy said: The hat fell (the first one). The scholar said quickly, not landing, but the ground.

Extremely help the scholar pick up the hat, fasten it firmly on the scholar's head, and then say: I won't touch the ground again this time. A couple of landlords are notoriously stingy.

One day, a man went into town and wanted to go to the toilet while walking, but on second thought, this good fertilizer can't be cheap for others. So I've been holding it.

Later, I couldn't hold it any longer, so I went to the toilet. But nothing came out except a few farts.

So I'm proud. Go home and tell the old woman about her experience.

Who knows that my wife flew into a rage: You are a black sheep, how can you live like this? How nice it would be to save these farts and blow the lights! Once upon a time, there was a scholar named "Xipo" who often praised Su Shi. During the drought, the satrap set up an incense table to beg for rain and ordered him to write poems to remember this grand occasion.

The scholar wrote a poem saying: "The satrap prays for rain, and all the people are grateful for virtue. Last night I pushed the window to see the moon. "

The satrap was furious and sent Yunyang. His uncle gave it to him.

Farewell, the scholar saw that his uncle was blind, so he presented a poem: "See Yunyang, and see my uncle as if he were my mother." People cry together, three lines. "

To match, officials like his poems, take his wife as the topic and ask him to recite them. The scholar said, "Ring Ding Dong, madam, come out of the back hall.

Three-inch golden lotus, horizontal. "Officer, make its self-mockery.

Scholars are.

5. Translating China's ancient jokes can't save money —— Laughing Building by Feng Ming Menglong.

There was a man who was extremely stingy, and the stream of Lu Yu rose recently. He crossed the river with great meanness and waded desperately. In the middle reaches, the water washed down and drifted for half a mile. His son searched for a boat on the shore to save him. The boat wants money, and the money goes there. The son only pays five cents, and the price is uncertain for a long time. On his deathbed, the father turned to look after his son and shouted, "My son, my son, five cents to save you, but no money to save you!" "

translate

He is very stingy. Once, when he was on the way, he met a new river rising. Although he could cross the river by boat, he was afraid to pay for the boat, so he waded across the river regardless. Just to the middle of the river, it was washed down by the water and drifted for more than half a mile. His son is on the shore, looking for a boat to save him. The boatman set the sailing price and said that he could only go if he gave a sum of money. His son bargained for him and said that he would only give five points. This bargaining has dragged on for a long time, and there has been no conclusion. At this time, his father was dying. When he was dying, he turned around and shouted to his son:

"My son, my son, you can save it in five minutes and not a penny!"

6. Whether there are jokes translated in ancient Chinese is on my side, and the students are all seated. It's so depressing that students don't come. "

The joke is probably like this: A private school teacher teaches The Analects of Confucius, and' Melancholy is literature' is misunderstood as' Everyone is equal to me'. Later, a new teacher in a private school pronounced "gloomy literature and art" correctly, and the students thought that the new teacher had made a mistake and would not come to school. At that time, people ridiculed the poem and said,' Everyone is equal to me, and all students sit. I am depressed that the students are not coming. "

-

One day, it was a sunny day, and Yu Yu and You gathered in a humble room. The fate is short and the wind is cold. Yu Youren sighed, "Alas, it's bad luck. The dragon is trapped in shallow water, and the clouds hide the young pine." Who is wrong if the major is not hot? It is too late! "

Yu Youren also sighed and said, "It's my life to be a great teacher, and the bones and muscles of the Chinese Department are miserable. Nothing is too much! "

His friend shook his head and said, "The misery of China people can be attributed to the injustice of five continents. The absurdity of chemistry often lies in remoteness and the incomprehension of ordinary people. Therefore, the suffering of my bones and muscles is not what you know. "

The other person keeps silent, and I care about his endless life. Some people are twice as strong as me. He smiled and said, "My brother's career can be described as fiery, and my wife and children can be described as hungry, right?"

My brother was angry when he was beige, and his mouth was full of surprise. "Your career can make a living, but my career is hopeless. Why is it hot? "

The other three people explored it and were silent for a long time before answering: "invertebrate linguistics!" "

-

One night, I was wandering on the platform of a voracious society, and I couldn't help staring at a woman with long hair.

After a while, the woman suddenly approached.

Stop and look at me. Yu Daoan, "I'm not very handsome"! But see my eyes wide open and my mouth twitching.

Sigh "Am I too ugly"?

But see the bigger Iraq's eyes, the more Zhang Yue opens her mouth. I'm afraid I've always been a real gentleman and never offended anyone.

For her, let alone forever.

Acquaintances? I tried to turn around, but suddenly I heard Iraq shout. . . . . . Ah. . Strange. ! ! "。 she

Rub your nose and drift away.

I'm already sweating.