Tell me a joke! Words are short and funny!

The following is my collection, which is not organized and a bit messy. Please indulge.

professor

"I brought a frog today," the professor of zoology said to the students. "I just came from

Caught it in the pond. In this lesson, we will dissect frogs. "

He took out a paper box and opened it carefully. There is a ham sandwich in the box.

"Strange," the professor was very surprised. "I clearly remember having lunch together.

One day, the wolf wanted to eat three little pigs. Two of the three little pigs are at the door and one is on the roof. Pig 1 and pig 2 are at the door, and pig 3 is on the roof. Who is the name of pig 1, where is the name of pig 2, and what is the name of pig 3. ) So there was a wonderful dialogue.

Wolf: Who are you?

Pig 1: Right.

Wolf: What?

Pig 1: What's on the roof?

Wolf: I mean what's your name?

Pig 1: My name is "Who" and "What" is on the roof!

The wolf asked Pig 2 again: Who are you?

Pig 2: I'm not a "who", he is a "who". (pointing to pig 1)

Wolf: You know him?

Pig 2: Hmm!

Wolf: Who is he?

Pig 2: Yes.

Wolf: What?

Pig 2: What's on the roof!

Wolf: Where?

Pig 2: "Where" is me.

Wolf: Who?

Pig 2: Who is he? (pointing to the pig again 1)

Wolf: How should I know?

Pig 2: Who are you looking for?

Wolf: What?

Pig 2: He's on the roof?

Wolf: Where?

Pig 2: It's me.

Wolf: Who?

Pig 2: I'm not a "who", he is a "who".

Wolf: Good heavens!

Pig 1.2: "My God" is our father.

Wolf: What, your father is?

Pig 2: No!

The wolf couldn't stand it anymore and sighed: Why?

Pig 1.2.3: Do you know our grandfather?

Wolf: What?

Pig 1: No, our grandfather is "why".

Wolf: Why?

Pig 1: Yes!

Wolf: What's this?

Pig 1: There is no "why".

Wolf: Who?

Pig 1: Who am I?

Wolf: Who are you?

Pig 1: Yes, who am I?

Wolf: What?

Pig 1.2: He is on the roof. …………

[Scene 1]

Teacher: To be honest, do you smoke?

Boy a: no.

Teacher: No? Well, French fries, please.

Boy A: Naturally, I held out two fingers and took them. ...

Teacher: No? ! Call your parents ...

[Scene 2]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy b: no.

Teacher: No? Well, French fries, please.

Boy b: because I heard about a, I carefully took the French fries with my palm.

Teacher: Aren't you going to dip in some ketchup?

Boy B: I accidentally dipped too much, so I immediately bounced it with my finger. ...

Teacher: The posture of playing ash is very skillful. Call your parents ...

[Scene 3]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy c: no.

Teacher: No? All right, French fries.

Boy C: Because of the first two examples, I was very careful.

Teacher: Aren't you going to take a root home for your classmates?

Boy C: I put French fries in my ear. ...

Teacher: No? Call your parents ...

[Scene 4]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy e: no.

Teacher: Good. Have a French fries.

Boy E: I ate my French fries in fear.

Teacher: Aren't you going to treat the teacher to a root?

Boy E: Pass the French fries with both hands quickly, and then take out the lighter. ...

Teacher: No? ! Call your parents ...

[Scene 5]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy d: no.

Teacher: Good. Have a French fries.

Boy D: I'm eating my French fries with trepidation.

Teacher: Aren't you going to take a root home for your classmates?

Boy D: I carefully put the French fries in my upper pocket again.

The teacher suddenly shouted: The headmaster is coming!

Boy D quickly took the chip out of his pocket, threw it on the ground and stepped on it with his foot. ...

Teacher: No? ! Call your parents ...

[Scene 6]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy f: no.

Teacher: Good. Have a French fries.

Boy F: I finished eating in fear.

The teacher suddenly shouted: The headmaster is coming!

Boy F: Sweating palms, but still calmly lowering his head and saying: Hello, headmaster!

Teacher: The headmaster will smell your mouth.

Boy F takes out French fries: No, it's still there. The fire hasn't lit yet. ...

[Scene 7]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy G: I swear to God, I will never smoke again.

Teacher: You really don't smoke? All right, French fries.

Boy g naturally took it and ate it clean.

Teacher: That's a good boy. What brand of French fries do you usually like?

Boy G (smug): Greater China ...

Scene 8]

Teacher: Have a portion of French fries.

Boy n: no, thanks.

Teacher: ...

One day in math class, the teacher asked 1+ 1=? , I said I don't know. The teacher asked me to ask. I asked my mother who was cooking to let me out. I asked my father, who watched the ball again and shouted' cool'. I asked my sister, and she sang until the baby. I asked my brother and he said on the phone; I'll wait for you outside.

The next day, the teacher asked 1+ 1=? I said; Fuck off, the teacher slapped me, I yelled, the teacher called me a loser, and I called me mean. Old saying; Get out. I said; I'll wait for you outside. Allah's math teacher had high blood pressure on the spot and fainted. .....