Sketch Funny Script (Campus Edition)

Zhuge Liang: You are poor, so you know you have no money. I'd better lend you some weapons and equipment for a three-legged cat.

Zhou Yu: OK! Our army is short of green arrows and wants Mr. Zhu to send one million arrows.

Zhuge Liang: No problem, Lao Tzu's hard work is good. Come on, I'll sign a contract to prove that I can lend you an arrow. Three days will be fine!

Zhou Yu: If we can't finish our army, we need KO.

Zhuge Liang: I can't help it, so cruel.

Zhou Yu: Lu Su, watch Zhuge Liang.

Zhuge Liang: (Lu Su,/> & lt:"{}? >“”/& gt； ？" ? "？ & gt？ . ) quietly.

Lu Su: Pretend to be ready.

(On the third night, ask Lu to take the arrow together. )

Zhuge Liang: Rudy, oh no, Sun Lu, oh no, Brother Lu, where is the aircraft carrier I asked you to prepare? Lu Su: On the river.

Zhuge Liang: OK, let's go. By the way, what happened to Simmons that I asked you to prepare?

Lu Su: On the boat.

Zhuge Liang: let's go

Lu Su: What's the use of this Simmons boat? I didn't come to sleep.

Zhuge Liang: You will know all about it then. Get on the boat quickly. If you miss the time, you will lose 100 yuan per second (Zhuge Liang and Lu Su got on the boat and headed for Cao Ying. Lu Su found out and was taken aback. )

Lu Su: Isn't this, isn't this Lao Cao's territory? Don't you know there are many hooligans there? You want us to die at the hands of hooligans? ! ! !

Zhuge Liang: It doesn't matter. Someone will collect your body and bury it when you are dead. Give you an urn for free at most.

Lu Su: 20% discount for cremation and 30% discount for funeral.

Zhuge Liang: Everything is fine. The owner of the crematorium is my old classmate.

Lu Su: Then I'm relieved.

(Cao)

Cao Cao: Work hard and get overtime pay. I'm going to sleep first (Dream: chicken leg, duck neck, roast whole sheep, hamburger ...)

Soldier: Prime Minister, Prime Minister.

Cao Cao: What's the matter?

Soldier: Here comes Shu's aircraft carrier. What should we do?

Cao Cao: What about the aircraft carrier? .....................................................................................................................................................................

Soldier: Yes.

Cao Cao: Quick, send a crossbowman to shoot them.

Soldier: Yes. (archery)

(After a bitter struggle)

Lu Su: Are there enough arrows?

Zhuge Liang: Of course that's enough.

Lu Su: How do you know?

Zhuge Liang: The calculator by the sea is fast and accurate. ...

Lu Su: Ok, stop advertising and come back when there are more arrows.

Zhuge Liang: Don't worry, one more thing.

Lu Su: What is it?

Zhuge Liang: Someone.

Shu Bing: Thank you, Prime Minister Cao.

Cao Cao: Bagaya Road, they have all the arrows. They are famous brands.

Zhuge Liang: I handed in the arrow as scheduled, shouldn't you also (ask for money)?

Zhou Yu: OK, heartache.

(end of the play)

Number of people: Zhuge Liang

Lu su

Zhou Yu

Cao Cao

Cao Cao's soldiers (5 people)

Shu soldiers (5 people)

Props: three tables

Two chairs

Two paper cups

Some money (a dime will do)

a piece of paper