What are the funny jokes?

1. I went to the hospital for a physical examination. The doctor took my report and said, it's a good thing you came early. When I broke out in a cold sweat, the doctor said unhurriedly, I got off work late.

2. Some people use animals to compare the advantages of their girlfriends. I also made up a paragraph for my wife: "unicorn arms, elephant legs; Bear waist, tiger back; Tattooed eyebrows and a floating mouth; Dye your nails and love to stink. " Read it to my wife at night, and I will have leopard-skin panda eyes.

3. The mother asked her five-year-old son, "If mom and dad quarrel, which side would you stand on?" The child thought carefully and said firmly, "Stand by!"

At the reunion of college classmates, I found that I couldn't name them, and I couldn't help feeling that there were too many truants in that year. After eating, I found that I was in the wrong room. ?

5. Wife: "Husband, if someone bought me for100000, would you sell it?" Husband: "Of course not!" The wife was so happy that she gave her husband a hard kiss and asked, "Why?" The husband glanced at his wife and said in disgust, "You are not worth100000. I won't make such unconscionable money! "