Five selected vivid children's joke stories

# Ability training # Lead jokes have the characteristics of short space, simple and ingenious stories, often unexpected, and a wonderful feeling of sudden laughter. Most of them reveal absurd phenomena in life, which are ironic and entertaining. There are different tastes. The following are five vivid children's joke stories. Welcome to read the reference!

A selection of vivid children's jokes

One morning, a farmer was driving two Niu Gengdi cars in the field when suddenly a tiger appeared in front of him.

The farmer was startled and saluted quickly. The tiger roared at him, "I think you are as thin as a bone and don't have much meat to eat." You should learn to hunt animals like me. " The farmer said, "Everyone has his own living habits." The tiger said, "well, I live by eating wild animals." Please let me eat the cow! " As soon as the farmer heard this, he quickly begged the tiger.

While the farmer was arguing with the tiger, the farmer's wife saw it from a distance. She immediately figured out a way to deal with tigers. She put on her husband's clothes and headscarf, then borrowed a pottery knife and rode to see the tiger.

When she approached the field, she shouted, "Oh, God bless me, there really is a tiger in the field to satisfy my hunger." I haven't eaten tiger meat for a long time. " When I was young, I often ate tigers for breakfast. "

Hearing these words, the tiger disagreed at first. It doesn't believe that the man standing in front of him will eat a tiger for breakfast every day. However, the farmer's wife waved her sickle and said, "I have sharpened my knife." Get ready, tiger. Let me cut your neck. " The tiger thought it was bad and ran away.

On the way, the tiger met the jackal. The jackal said, "Your Majesty, why are you running in such a hurry? I'm here to pick up the bones you left behind. Let me eat your leftovers! " "Don't go!" The tiger said, "There is a wicked man in that field. He rode a horse to protect farmers and cows. " The wicked man said that he ate tigers every day. The jackal smiled and said, "You must be scared and confused. I can see clearly that it is not a villain, but a farmer's wife dressed as a villain. " "Are you sure? The tiger said, "Of course, if you don't believe me, I will go with you again." "The jackal answered affirmatively. The tiger and the jackal are back.

Besides, when the farmer's wife saw the jackal bring the tiger back, she knew he must have bad ideas. She immediately figured out a way to deal with them.

When the tiger and jackal approached, she shouted again, "Hey, jackal, thank you very much for bringing me a tiger for breakfast. I'll eat it later, and you can get some bones to chew on. "

Hearing this, the tiger thought that the wicked had colluded with the jackal and plotted to eat it. He quickly turned around and ran away with his tail between his legs.

The second part: Select vivid children's joke stories.

When Su Dongpo was a magistrate in Hangzhou, he cooked a fresh fish one day and was eating it when his good friend Huang Tingjian came. He immediately hid the fish on the top of the bookcase, arranged several dishes, and drank wine with Huang in the study. Unexpectedly, Huang found this hidden fish.

After three glasses of wine, Huang Tingjian said, "You are a Su (Su). Some people put fish on the right side of the word "He", while others put fish on the left side of the word "He". Which side do you think is right? "

Su Dongpo didn't know it was a plan, and replied, "Any way will do."

"What if you put fish on it?"

"Then how to get there? No, no! "

Huang Tingjian smiled happily and said, "Since it can't be put on it, then take the fish down and let me have a good time!"

Chapter III: Selected vivid children's joke stories.

Yu Qian was a national hero who fought against nomadic people in Ming Dynasty. He learned from primary school literature and practiced martial arts. He is clever, but he is also a little naughty. His mother loves him very much and often ties his hair into two strands and stands up like two small horns. One day, while he was having a good time, a monk made fun of him and said, "The bull's head loves to have dragon horns. Yu Qian was impatient and casually replied," Dogs never spit ivory.

Hearing this, the monk was in distress situation, thinking that Xiao Yuqian really couldn't afford to offend, so he had to leave bitterly.

Yu Qian went home and said to his mother, "Don't comb my hair like this again."

A day later, the monk's apprentice Lan saw Yu Qian comb a triangular bun and jokingly said, "A triangle is like a drum stand."

Yu Qian immediately replied: "The bald head is like a thunder hammer." Later, Lan said to his master, "This child will become the prime minister of the country in the future."

One day, Yu Qian was dressed in red, riding a bamboo horse and playing on the bridge. It happened that Taishou passed by incognito, and Taishou read a couplet: "Hong Haier rode across the bridge." Yu Qian said to him, "Chi Di is responsible for chopping snakes." The satrap was surprised.

A few years later, Yu Qian became a scholar. Another satrap, Liu, wandered around a temple. Pointing to the Buddha statue in the temple, the satrap said, "Three giant buddhas sit like lotus flowers, and no one can compete with the official." . Someone said, "Let this little scholar have a good look." Yu Qian replied superciliously: A scholar climbed the phoenix, dragon and laurel.

Yu Qian is a scholar, but as a child, he likes playing in the wild, especially flowers, so that when his father sent him to take an examination of juren, there was still a flower hidden in his sleeve. Unexpectedly, his secret was discovered by the examiner as soon as he entered the examination room. The examiner liked the little scholar very much, so he said to him in a pun: Children hide spring scenery. "Spring scenery" originally refers to the colorful scene of spring. There are both praises to young people who have less money and hints to the flowers in the money sleeve. When Yu Qian listened to the music, he praised the examiner for being really smart and quickly replied: The boss is observant.

"Old" to "small", "adult" to "child", "epiphany" to "concealment" and "autumn" to "spring" are so seamless and natural that the examiner can't help but praise again and again: "What a terrible child, prodigy!"

Chapter four: Selected vivid children's jokes.

There was a philosopher named Wang Chong in the Eastern Han Dynasty. He dares to propagate atheism and criticize superstition. He is a brave and knowledgeable materialist.

At that time, many people believed that when people died, the soul became a ghost. Some people have actually seen ghosts, saying that ghosts look and dress exactly the same as when people were alive. Wang Chong immediately seized their flaw and asked derisively, "You said that when a person dies, the soul can become a ghost. Does the clothes he wears also have a soul and become a ghost? According to you, clothes have no spirit and will not become ghosts. If you really see a ghost, it should be naked, naked. Why are you still wearing clothes? "

His words broke the other side. Wang Chong also said humorously: "I haven't known it for thousands of years. Many more people died than are alive now. People become ghosts when they die, and ghosts are everywhere on the road. If people can see ghosts, they should see millions of children, and houses, yards and even streets are full of ghosts. But how many people have seen ghosts? I only said that I have seen one or two, and the statement is contradictory. "

Some people argue that "no one can become a ghost if he dies." Only when he dies, his heart and spirit are resentful, can he become a ghost. There is no record in ancient books that during the Spring and Autumn Period, Fu Cha, the king of Wu, boiled Wu Zixu in a pot and threw it into the river. Wu Zixu swallowed their anger and died a ghost. So it's amazing to set off a tide and vent his anger every autumn. How can you say there are no ghosts? "

Wang Chong said, "The enemy of Wu Zixu is Fu Cha, the king of Wu. Wu has long since perished, and so has Fu Cha, the king of Wu. Who is Wu Zixu's enemy and angry with? If Wu Zixu really turned into a ghost and had the power to set off the tide, why didn't he make an effort to set off the tide when he was in the cauldron and pour the cauldron of boiling water on the prince Fu Cha? "

Wang Chong's statement was really a blow, leaving them speechless.

Five vivid children's joke stories.

There is a new county magistrate in Shaoxing, surnamed Wu, who is quite literary but also very proud. I heard that Xu Wenchang, a famous local scholar, was very knowledgeable and unconvinced.

Once, he invited a group of squires to drink and asked Xu Wenchang to attend, trying to make things difficult for him.

During the dinner, the magistrate of Wu county took advantage of the euphoria and sent someone to make an alliance. Lian said, "Two people sit in the dirt." Xu Wenchang knows it's hard to get it right, because there are two roles and a local role when sitting separately, but it doesn't bother me. He immediately made a couplet: "It will be clear in January."

Then, Wuxian issued another order: "Divide the rice noodles with eight knives." This is even harder. "Eight knives are points", and the combination of "points" and "meters" is "powder". The bottom line must match like this. They all looked at Xu Wenchang to see how he was right. However, Xu Wenchang just thought for a moment and slowly replied: "A thousand miles of money."

The squires all said it was great. Wuxian made another order: "Haiyan River is clear, and the king is the country."

Xu Wenchang looked at the outdoor winter scenery and said, "It's freezing, and water can't be frozen without two points."

Wu county magistrate listened, secretly admiring that water and two points make ice, but he still refused to stop. He said, "I'll make another couplet this time. If I can't do it well, I'll be fined three cups." Xu Wenchang smiled and said, "What if it's right?" Wuxian ordered: "I will also be fined three cups." So I went out again: "Laughing refers to the deep forest, and a dog sleeps under the bamboo."

Xu Wenchang replied: "Look at those hidden households, standing alone at the door."

Wu county magistrate was helpless and had to punish three cups. That's the right thing to do. It happened that Wuxian refused to give up in anger and wanted to overwhelm. At this moment, a pockmarked servant came through the snow and brought the wine in. Because of the spikes on his feet, spots like pockmarked spots were left on the snow. Wu county magistrate ignored his identity and immediately made a couplet: "Nailing shoes and stepping on snow will make you pockmarked."

Hearing this, Xu Wenchang felt wronged for his servant, thinking, I'm just as well if you are in trouble, so it's really wrong to insult his servant. In that case, I'll take it out on the servant, too. He looked up, and it was a county magistrate, young, wearing a fox coat and drinking himself proudly. He said casually, "Leather clothes are animals."

Xu Wenchang's bottom allied exports, it is a burst of laughter. If the county magistrate can't step down, he will be ashamed and angry. At this moment, a mouse happened to pass by the hall. The magistrate of Wuxian county was in a hurry and ran to Xu Wenchang and said, "Mr. Xu, I'll give you another couplet." Then read: "Rats, big or small, are old."

Hearing this, Xu Wenchang knew he was up to no good. He thought, as a county magistrate, since you don't know how to love yourself, I will never leave you any face. So he bowed his head and said with a smile, "Wu county, I dare to make couplets!" " "At this time, when the squires saw their swords and guns coming, they really couldn't sit still, but they couldn't leave. Xu Wenchang said to him, "A tortoise has a male and a female, and its surname is always Wu. "

At this point, Wu county magistrate was ashamed and speechless, so he had to pretend to be drunk and leave.