Positive energy joke

Positive energy jokes are often boring in our lives, so we need to find some fun to spice up our lives. I believe everyone has heard of it. Take a look at my collection of articles about positive energy jokes. Welcome to reading.

Positive energy joke 1

First of all, you must think clearly before you come near me. I have nothing but good looks.

Second, if you feel sick, don't search online. Make a will after every search.

Third, look at beautiful women in the street. If you look up, you will appreciate them, and if you look down, you will be hooligans.

Fourth, eat enough and go to bed early. Don't stay up because you are ugly.

I found that there are two kinds of people, one is mentally ill, and the other is with low IQ, which is not enough for mental illness.

I have lived half my life, and I really want to do something for the economic development of my motherland, but I am not qualified to pay taxes!

Seven, the exam is a person's business, but the score is a matter of seven aunts and eight aunts and a group of people next door, such as Lao Wang.

Eight, good-looking people generally experience more stories, and ugly people generally hear more stories.

Don't always belong to single dog, single dog. You should be a single turtle by age, a single pig by size and a single fool by IQ.

Ten, losing weight is not so easy, every catty of meat has its temper, after eating fat, it is better to give up if you are entangled.

1 1. Don't always compare yourself with others. You envy others for being thin, others envy you for having a good stomach, you envy others for being rich, and others envy no one to borrow money from you.

Twelve, some people's depression is melodramatic, some people's procrastination is lazy, some people's obsessive-compulsive disorder is idle egg pain, and some people's insomnia is too much sleep in class.

Positive energy joke 2 1 When waiting in line for payment, a girl in front dropped a 50-dollar bill. I don't think she paid much attention, so she quickly pretended that her shoelaces were loose, stepped on the money and prepared to pick it up after she left. After a while, she suddenly said, "Big Brother, you can't tie your shoelaces until next year."

Physical examination, the beautiful nurse asked to bring a box of feces to check. When I saw someone selling baked sweet potatoes outside, I thought of Doby. I bought baked sweet potatoes outside, kneaded them into mud, and sent them to a box for inspection. "16, you have too many boxes, don't use so many." The nurse called my number. I stepped forward and picked up the box and said, "Don't bother, look at me." Then he grabbed the contents with his hand and began to eat. The nurse threw up on the spot. Then the buddy next to her said, "Brother, that box is mine. You took it wrong. "

3. A software salesman went to the noodle restaurant to eat. He looked around for a while and said to the boss, "Do you want to change customers? The interface is old. " The boss suddenly froze. I have never seen such a guest who offered to help with his face. The boss quickly waved his hand and said, "no, no, I'll do it." The interface ... our side is definitely new, not old. "

4. When I was getting ready for bed at night, I suddenly had a stomachache. I got up and went to the toilet only to find that there was no paper towel at home. I searched for it for a long time but I couldn't find it. When I didn't know what to do, I suddenly remembered that there was a small paper towel delivered outside at night. I quickly went to the takeout bag to find the package of tissues and rushed to the toilet. After a carefree vent, I found that T M's gloves were disposable when I was about to wipe them with paper towels.

Roll paper was sold very cheaply in the supermarket that day. I bought three big bags at once, and I happened to meet a female colleague when I came out with a roll of paper. She was very surprised and said, "I didn't expect you to be so thin and in such good health." I said doubtfully, "So many rolls of paper are not heavy at all, are they?" The female colleague was speechless: "That's not what I said."

6. The neighbor's puppy is lost. The woman asked the man to print some tips for finding dogs and stick them nearby. By the way, he also made a dog-finding tip on TV. As a result, the man was puzzled: "our dog can't read and doesn't watch TV." Are these things useful? "

Positive energy joke 3 1, life is difficult to hit several times, when will you wait until you don't hit at this time?

Everyone's road to success may be different, but I believe that success requires everyone who wants to succeed to work hard and struggle, and every road to success is full of bumps. Only those who firmly believe in their goals and keep working hard and struggling can achieve ultimate success. But I always believe that when you can make yourself cry, you will succeed!

3. Only after suffering from hell can conquest of paradise have strength. Only bloody fingers can play the swan song of the world.

4, frustration, sometimes like a desert, trying to make people lose their way. However, a confident person will always have a "compass" in his hand, and he will never lose his way and forge ahead bravely towards his goal; However, the frustrated person is like a headless fly all day long. Wherever he hits, he will never get out of the "desert".

5, relying on the mountain will fall, relying on water to draw water will flow, and relying on yourself will never fall.

6. Life should be tolerant of loneliness, and study with great interest should also be tolerant of loneliness. "There is a road to diligence in Lushan, and there is no limit to learning the sea." Diligence and hard study will enrich your life. "Genius comes from diligence", "Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration." It shows the great role of hard work and hard study and its incomparable influence on life. Life is deeply creative, even innovative, opening up a bumper harvest scene of life.

7. What if I come last? At least I'm athletic. And I will definitely run the whole course, as long as I run to the finish line, I will succeed!

When I went out and saw an uncle fall, I went over and asked, Grandpa, my salary is 2000 yuan a month. Can I help you up? Grandpa: Go away, son. I'll wait a little longer.

Me: OK, thanks! Although the weather is cold, my uncle's words are warm and full of positive energy. ...

After work at night, I found that the old man was still there, so I asked him, Grandpa, are you crazy all day?

Grandpa said: Hey, I feel tired and don't love you, son. Please help me up. I'm not wrong. I'm leaving this dump. My salary is too low.