The funniest joke~

1. A dormitory of a certain university celebrated the birthday of a senior. They drank heavily in a small restaurant. Everyone was so drunk that they staggered back to the dormitory one after another. As soon as GG slept on the upper bunk, her feet became weak and she couldn't climb up, so she slept on the lower bunk. The guy in the lower bunk went back to the dormitory and saw someone was already sleeping, so he said: Are you sleeping? So I slept under the lower bunk bed.

2. There was a swimming class in the four years of the university. The landlubbers were all scared and didn’t know how to pass. So they asked the old student for advice. The old student smiled and said: "The top part is doing the swimming posture, and the bottom part is doing the swimming posture." Walking posture!"

3. For the convenience of students, the dormitory duty room has a new function - a small shop. One night, several classmates came home late, only to find the building door closed and the store dark. I shouted a few times, but no one answered. Then I knocked on the door, but still no one answered.

Everyone was worried that they would not be able to enter. Suddenly a classmate suddenly got an idea and shouted, ‘Instant noodles! 'The lights in the duty room suddenly turned on, and then there was a loud response: "What brand do you want? How many bags?"

4. In math class, when we talk about "intersection", there is The students spread their thoughts, looked at each other and smiled when they thought of me. At this time, the teacher asked: "Is there any Coke?" Then a classmate whispered: "Is there any Sprite, is there any Fanta?"

5. One day, the head teacher asked the first-grade students: "None of you have studied mathematics." Xiao Ming raised his hand high.

Then, the teacher asked him: "What is the number after three?" Xiao Ming replied: "It is four." The teacher then asked: "What is the number after nine?" Xiao Ming said: "It is ten. "The teacher praised him a lot, and finally asked Xiao Ming: "What's the number after ten?" Xiao Ming said: "It's 'J'"...

6. Two people live in a room. Sleep on a bed and cover yourself with a quilt.

A guy said: "Watch out, I'm going to fart!" After saying that, he farted under the covers.

After a while, another guy stuck his head out from under the quilt and said, "Oh my God, what the hell is this? I was hiding under the quilt and it was so smelly that I almost fainted."

7. Two policemen picked up three bombs and were going to hand them over. On the way, a policeman said to another policeman: "What if one bomb explodes on the way."

"Then when we get there, we can just say that we only picked up two." Another said a police officer.

8. When I was a child, I would play wildly outside until dark before I remembered to go home for dinner. The power went out, and the courtyard was dark. Mom and my brothers and sisters have already had dinner. Under the dim light, I rushed to the dinner table, pointed at the dark stuff in the bowl and asked them what it was. My brother and sister hurriedly said: "It's beef." I was so hungry that I didn't even bother to hold the chopsticks. I picked up a piece and was about to eat it. Before I put it in my mouth, they laughed. My sister said: "Those are leftover sweet potato peels."

9. A man was driving a donkey cart to cross the bridge. The arch at the head of the bridge was not high enough. He was worried that the donkey cart would not be able to pass, so he took a rivet head from the cart and very carefully knocked off some of the stones on the arch.

The police passed by and saw him and said: "There are such fools in the world! Can't you just remove a layer of soil under the arch and pass?"

The driver didn't Convinced: "You're such a fool! It's not because the donkey's legs are too long to get through, but because the donkey's ears are too long."

10. An old man has never taken an elevator. That day, he came to a hotel, stood at the elevator door and saw an old lady entering the elevator. After a while, the elevator door opened again, and a young and beautiful girl came out. He was overjoyed and thought: "Wow. , It would be nice if I brought my wife."

11. A: "The doctor suggested that I use chocolate to quit smoking."

B: "What's the effect?"

A: "No, I tried it, but the chocolate couldn't be lit at all."