Require 2 English humor or jokes

1 Two Birds

Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell us.

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

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Two birds

Teacher: There are two birds here, one is a sparrow. Can anyone point out which is a swallow and which is a sparrow?

Student: I can’t point out, but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell me.

Student: Next to a swallow is a sparrow, and next to a sparrow is a swallow.

2 The Fish Net

"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?"

"A lot of little holes tied together with strings. " replied the little girl.

Fish Net

"Can you tell me what the fish net is made of, Ann?" the teacher asked.

"Tie many small holes together with ropes to make a fishing net." The little girl replied.

3 The New Teacher

George comes from school on the first of September.

"George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother .

"I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too....."

New Teacher

On September 1st, George came home from school.

"George, do you like your new teacher?" Mom asked.

"Mom, I don't like it, because she said 3 plus 3 gets 6, but then she said 2 plus 4 also gets 6."

4 A physics Examination

Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates were thinking it hard. The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls? Nick"s answer: because our eyes are before ears.

A physics exam

During a physics exam, while the classmates were still thinking hard, Nick quickly answered the first question. .

The question is: Why do we always see the lightning first and then hear the thunder when it thunders? Nick’s answer is: Because the eyes are in front and the ears are in the back.

5

One day, a man entered the elevator and found that a young woman was already inside.

The woman asked: "Sir, are you lewd enough?" "?"

The man was shocked! He couldn't answer, "I...are you okay..."

The woman rolled her eyes and said: "What's okay?" ?I ask you, are you going up or going down?"