I want to find such a joke, just one.

1. A priest was playing golf, and a nun was watching. The first shot missed, and the priest scolded, "TMD, missed!" Hit again, the priest scolded again: "TMD, missed again!" " The nun said, "God will punish you for swearing as a priest." As soon as the voice fell, I heard a thunder chop the nun to death. The priest wondered: why am I the one who cursed? Why did I chop the nun to death? At this time, I only heard the voice of God from the sky: "TMD, I missed too!" "

2. Believer: "Almighty God, how long is 1, years for you?"

god: "I blink."

Believer: "What about 1 billion yuan?"

God: "It's just a hair of mine."

Believer: "Oh, merciful God, please give me a hair."

God: "No problem, I'll give it to you after I blink."

3. The head coaches of the football teams of China, Japan and South Korea came to heaven together and asked God when their respective football teams would win the World Cup. God said: South Korea needs 5 years. The Korean coach burst into tears: I won't see it again. God also said: Japan needs 1 years. The Japanese coach burst into tears: I won't see it again. Coach China quickly asked: What about us? God burst into tears: I won't see it again.

4. There was a man who had a middle-aged son and was very fond of him. He struggled to bring his son to adulthood and put him through college. His son was dressed in a suit and tie and his face was red, but he was ragged and hungry. He saved money to buy a house for his son, married a wife and became old himself. However, his son was unfilial and kicked him out of the house on a stormy night. The old man came to a ruined temple to take shelter from the rain. The old man was very sad and sighed: God, why is it so unfair to me? After a flash of lightning, an older voice said, "This is karma." At this time, the old man saw an older man coming in and out of the corner of the ruined temple. The old man was frightened: "Are you God?" Older people say, "Asshole! You kicked me out more than twenty years ago. I'm your father. You don't know me anymore? "

5. In the barber's shop, when the priest paid for the haircut, the barber said, "I won't accept your money, so I will serve God." The next morning, the barber saw a thank-you letter and some bibles in front of the shop.

A few days later, a police officer had to pay for a haircut. The barber said, "I won't charge you, so I'll just serve our community."

The next morning, the barber saw another thank-you note and some Community Service Manuals in front of the shop.

A few days later, when a government official came to have a haircut and paid the money, the barber said to him, "I won't accept your money, so I'll take it as a service for the government." The next morning, the barber saw a row of government officials standing in front of the door.

6. One day, Clinton's wife, Chirac, was taken to see God. She found many watches hanging in God's living room, and some of them walked fast, while others walked slowly. So she asked God's servant, "Why does God collect so many watches? And these watches don't go as fast? "

The servant of God said, "These watches represent people's lives. Everyone in the world has a watch. If he has many affairs, his watch will go fast, but if he has no affairs, it will go slowly."

after hearing this, Chirac looked around and said, "why didn't you see my husband Clinton's watch?" The servant of God said, "Your husband's watch was taken to the office by God as an electric fan!

7. An old couple born in the same year and the same month lived together for 35 years. Today, they held a big banquet to celebrate their 6th birthday. During the banquet, God came. God praised the old couple as real "loving couples" and promised to give each of them a wish. The old lady said excitedly, "We are poor. I just want to have a good look at the world and make a global tour."

God waved his hand, and with a bang, a dozen plane tickets fell into the old lady's hand from the air. It's the old man's turn to make a wish. He thought for a while and said, "I want to marry a woman 3 years younger than me."

god strikes again, and bam! .....

The old man suddenly became 9 years old

8. God pinched a man with mud, and there was a human being from then on;

There were white people first-because God put clay figurines on the fire and roasted them lightly;

Secondly, there are black people-because they are worried that the heat will not be finished, they will be baked too much;

Later, when we mastered the best temperature, we became yellow people, so we are the most successful masterpiece of God.

9. Little Peter proudly said to his friend, "My uncle is a priest, and everyone calls him a respected priest."

little Paul said, "my uncle is a bishop, and everyone who talks to him calls him your Excellency."

Little Lachus was unconvinced: "What's the big deal? My uncle weighs 15 kilograms. "

When everyone saw him, they shouted, "Oh! My God! "