Children's joke: laugh happily!

1, some friends came to the house, and the mother put her 5-year-old son and friends' children on a small table. The son begged his mother to let him sit with the adults.

"no!" Mother said, "Son, you are still young. When you grow a beard, you can eat and drink with me. " My son is deaf, pulling his head, and reluctantly sitting on the child's desk.

At this time, the kitten at home was attracted by the smell of vegetables. It turned to the son's feet, and the son kicked: "Go! You already have a beard! Go to an adult to eat and drink. "

2, 5-year-old children to his father to send food, on the way to see a cleaner in the sewer, they stopped.

"One of my brother's gold coins rolled out of this crack in the sewer cover," said the child.

Suddenly, the cleaner's eyes lit up: "Son," he said casually, "bring food to your father quickly, it will get cold soon."

Half an hour later, the child passed by here again and saw the cleaner covered in sewage and still busy there.

"Are you sure the gold coins rolled down from here?" The cleaner asked. "That's right," the child replied. "My father took it out."

A family of three moved into a new house. The wife saw that her husband and son didn't pay much attention to hygiene, so she wrote a slogan at home, "Pay attention to hygiene, everyone is responsible." Urge the son and husband to pay attention to hygiene.

When my son came home from school, he saw the slogan, took out his pen and changed it to "Pay attention to hygiene, adults are responsible".

The next day, my husband saw it and took out a pen to change the slogan to "Pay attention to hygiene, and my wife is responsible."

Whenever Xiaoming reads books and newspapers, his grandfather always wears reading glasses. Xiao Ming feels strange: "Grandpa, why do you always wear glasses when reading and writing?"

Grandpa replied, "because then you can see clearly!" "

Xiao Ming nodded and clapped his hands happily and said, "Grandpa, I know, glasses are bigger than eyes!" " "

Children's jokes and happy smiles (2)

1. A child got lost and asked the policeman on the side of the road. The policeman asked, "Where do you live, son?"

The child said, "My mother only taught me to ask the police if I got lost, but didn't tell me where to live."

2. One day, the wife asked her son, "Do you like Chinese or math best?" The son shook his head.

The wife asked again, "So, do you like music or painting?" The son shook his head again.

The wife is anxious: "Do you have a favorite class?"

My son said seriously, "Class is over."

After dinner, dad saw his son Xiaoming counting coins and asked him an arithmetic problem: "What is 8 plus 16?" Xiao Ming fiddled with his fingers and toes anxiously, but it was not enough to draw for a long time.

Dad was anxious: "Can't you use your brain?"

Xiao Ming said: "Only one brain is not enough!"

4. Children in kindergarten are chatting.

The little one said, "I'm in too much pain. My mother said there was lettuce in the hamburger, which made me afraid to eat it. Only yesterday did I know that there was a dish called lettuce! " "

Little B said, "I am even worse. I was lovelorn at the age of 55, because my mother said medicine was sweet, just like sugar. Xiaohua said she wanted to eat sugar, so I gave her my grandfather's medicine ... The next day, her mother told her not to associate with me. "

Xiao C said, "What's the matter? That day my mother asked me if I wanted a new home, and I said yes, alas, as a result, I had a new father ... "

Children's jokes, happy smiles (3)

1. The child asked his father for pocket money. The father lamented, "son, don't value money too much." You know, some things are more important than money! "

"Why?"

"Because those more important things can only be bought with money!"

2. Son: "Dad, what is a drama?"

"This is a good program for the last performance."

Son: "Then I am a student. I came out of this exam, and my name was placed at the end. "

Mother is going to buy a birthday present for Weiwei's son tomorrow.

Mother: "Son, what do you want your mother to buy for you?"

Son: "I want a big cake."

Mom: "What else?"

Son: "There is also a big cake."

Mom: "What are you going to do with such a big cake? Can you put it in your stomach? "

Son: "Then I want another belly."

3. Classmate: "Why haven't you seen your brother these days?"

Xiao Ming: "He fell down and lay in bed."

Classmate: "What's the matter?"

Xiaoming: "We played a game to see who could put his hand out of the window farthest, and he won."

4. "Dad, my brother said I was the son of an asshole."

"I see, I will teach him a lesson." Dad said.

The child asked, "Is he also the son of an asshole?"

5. Teacher: Please make a sentence with the word "purpose".

Xiao Qiang: You are the most beautiful teacher I have ever seen.

Teacher: Thank you, but what about the "purpose"?

Xiao Qiang: I hope to go home early today.