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How should I adjust my mentality?
The root of people's suffering
Patients with mental depression generally have the following manifestations: depression, sentimentality, anxiety, insomnia and dreaminess, fear and paranoia, sadness and world-weariness, surprise and timidity, impatience and irritability, etc. Besides paying attention to diet and traditional Chinese and western medicine treatment, we should also pay attention to psychotherapy. There are several reasons for these phenomena and problems: financial constraints, housing problems, unemployment, bumpy love, unfortunate marriage, domestic violence, marital conflicts, work pressure, physical physiology, disease entanglement and so on. Are all factors that induce depression. In recent years, the number of suicides in China has been rising, which cannot but arouse people's concern. The small ones bring misfortune to a family, while the big ones bring social and national instability.
Regardless of nationality, age, status, wealth, gender ... Almost everyone on the earth has different troubles and pains, but the time of pain is different; It's just a matter of degree. Civilians have civilian suffering; Officials have official troubles. The ups and downs of officialdom and the competition for interests are complicated and more difficult to deal with. It is painful to be unable to survive without money; Less money, more things you can't afford; It is also painful to have too much money and worry about being stolen and not spending it. Men have men's troubles, and women have women's pains; Adults have the anguish of adults, and children have the distress of children. Coupled with the influence and temptation of family and social environment, it is really hard to prevent. Just like swimming in an ocean of pain, I don't know when I will sink to the bottom of the sea. Life is painful and miserable!
Generally speaking, people's pain is nothing more than mental pain, material pain and physical illness. These three aspects of pain are the most complicated, the longest lasting and the most difficult to alleviate. Physical and physical pain is closely related to mental pain. Chinese medicine says: anger hurts the liver, sadness hurts the lungs, and shock hurts the kidneys. Material affects the spirit, and emotion reacts on the body. If it is not handled well, it is a vicious circle. So what is pain? In fact, the so-called pain is just an understanding and orientation of everything in our spiritual level. When we think it is pain, we feel it is pain; When we think it is happiness, we feel it is happiness. For example, some people have millions, and then he looks at others for tens of millions or even hundreds of millions. He thought day and night: how can I get hundreds of millions? It is very painful to think day and night! And some people don't have much money, but live very freely! So some seemingly painful ones are actually fake; Some so-called pain is actually happiness; It is precisely because of our dissatisfaction and psychological deviation that we mistakenly think of pain. Look at how many rich people commit suicide and how many singers jump off buildings in this world. Are they short of money? No shortage. They lack healthy psychology; Lack of the key to pain; Lack of bridges and channels to communicate with people. In this way, then pain is a psychological orientation and a spiritual feeling of objective things in our consciousness. If we position it at the level of pain, then his spirit will suffer; If positioned at the level of happiness, it is happiness, regardless of one's own spiritual orientation and other people's views. Therefore, the decisive factors of pain and happiness are our mentality, specifically our life goals, life goals and core values.
Ordinary people's life goals and objectives are selfishness, self-greed and self-acquisition, to draw their own life trajectory of survival and life. Secular layers of fog cover people's eyes and hearts, which is the total source of people's pain. The motto on the wall of Harvard University is "serving the people". Some people say: less money is your own; Most of the money belongs to everyone; No amount of money belongs to the country. Come to think of it, this is indeed the truth. Living in the world for a hundred years is like staying in a hotel. Can't take it away, and can't take it away. In real life, people are often troubled by money. In a materialistic world, when others disagree with their own views, opinions and opinions; Or when others have contradictions and conflicts with their own interests, they will go on the rampage, lose their temper and fall into infinite pain, causing a vicious circle and being unable to extricate themselves. A person is in pain, sadness, anger and anxiety ... After a long period of darkness, the body will inevitably produce diseases. Then I fell into pain, and it cost a lot of money to treat the disease, and the material pain followed. It is really the bitterness of life. Unbearable, painful. I want to die, alas! Therefore, we understand the root of pain. If we want to relieve pain, we can only get rid of confusion by continuous learning. Only by cutting off confusion can we cut off desire; Only by cutting off desire can we cut off evil deeds; Only by cutting off evil deeds can we cut off pain; Only by cutting off the pain can we get happiness; Do something and do nothing; Do nothing. Do nothing. Give up in order to get something; If you have nothing, you will never leave. In the darkest time of psychology, we must see the light in front of us, even if we see a glimmer of light, it will save the most precious life in life! People are rare! This is especially true today when people are extremely anxious, impetuous and fragile. Think about it, the number of people who commit suicide every year in the world exceeds 1.5 million! If they finish reading this life speech in advance, maybe they will come out of the shadow of pain. Anger can only be a vicious circle, and hatred can only create new pain; Pain can only regenerate trouble. Smile with joy and forget hostility! Eliminating people's mental pain is to save a life! Pulling out all the sufferings of the masses is great love; Giving happiness, happiness and health to the public without stint and devoting one's life to the public is great love, and all thoughts and actions are centered on the sufferings and pleasures of the public, which is the realm of saints. In our real life, we always feel that a few people seem to be against themselves and can't get through. Is this the case in life? In fact, it is difficult for yourself and yourself, and it is also difficult for your heart. Our hearts are often between love and hate; Between tolerance and jealousy; Between peace and anger; Wandering between pleasure and pain, sometimes leaning towards the latter, right? Our hearts always feel that the world is unfair and that the other party is all wrong, right? From the law of cause and effect, all the realities in this world are reasonable and have certain karma. Now all the laws in the world judge guilt from the inevitable factors that constitute cause and effect. In fact, pain, trouble and everything that goes wrong are the same. In the final analysis, it is still the pain caused by the lack of our love. Always remind myself that I am the most confident person, the strongest person, the happiest person, the most caring person and the most successful person in the world!
Second, the way to eliminate pain
People suffer because they don't understand reason; Don't know the truth of the universe and the laws of things; Don't know the relationship between people; Do not understand human nature; No empathy; Closed and stubborn ideas, opposing ways of thinking and self-centered values. Always in a state of opposition or even confrontation with the public, but I don't know that opposing one person is opposing the public; Is the opposite of the universe; Is to be against your heart. In this way, we can only get farther and farther away from our own happiness. The reason is that there is something wrong with our mentality: dissatisfaction, melancholy, impetuousness, sadness, complaining, resentment, injury, hatred, anger ... and even the heart of killing. In a deeper sense, it is because we are too obsessed with ourselves, too selfish, too famous and famous, and the rigid methods and habits that have been formed for many years to think from one angle, one direction and one position. Even ten cows can't be pulled back, and there is a great danger of a larger foe. It seems that someone is holding our hearts and leading our noses to the abyss of pain. We can't be masters of ourselves! So I regret it when I reflect afterwards. At that time, my heart was like a wild horse without reins, and I couldn't stop getting off. When a person walks, there is a sea of fire, a mountain or a deep well in front of him. Excuse me, will he go forward? Definitely not. However, in real life, we often fall into a dead end, and the result is still bitter, planting our own bitter causes; Taste the bitter fruit yourself. In addition to selfishness, it is caused by rigid, rigid and fixed thinking patterns and methods for many years. At this moment, being able to change your mind-change your heart is "enlightenment"! China people are very clever. Look at the spelling of the word Wu. Isn't it my heart? He who can control his heart is an enlightened person! The faster and more timely the change, the higher the understanding. Being able to change yourself voluntarily is conscious. Of course, at the prompt of others, it is good to realize it! I'm afraid I'm stubborn By the time I left this world, my mind was still in the dark, still struggling with the public, still struggling with the world, still struggling with my own heart, and my body and mind were still not harmonious and could not be integrated with the public. What a painful life! It is reported that there are more than 654.38 billion patients with mental depression in China, including 65.438+0.6 million patients with severe and mental illness, and 287,000 people commit suicide every year. On average, 8000 couples divorce every day in this country. From a global perspective, its severity is even more unsightly. Based on this calculation, about 6.5438+0.5 million people commit suicide every year in the world, and a fresh life leaves us every 20 seconds on average. As for minor psychological disorders, there are countless more. And with the passage of time, there is a tendency to spread and expand. Aren't there many people in the world who leave this world with lifelong regrets? One of these suicides didn't expect that the white-haired man would be heartbroken when he sent the black-haired man. Your parents' heart died with you as soon as you left. You forget that it's mother's milk of 3 or 400 Jin-that's the kindness that mother's plasma has not repaid! Secondly, have you considered the feelings of your lover, children, (or lover,) friends …? Your relatives cry, your friends cry, and your relatives will be taken care of all their lives. Third, you are sorry for yourself! You haven't really seen the beauty and happiness of life! You just see the negativity and negativity in life. I saw a boy 16 years old on the Internet. His father left, and his mother lived alone with him for more than ten years. The little boy said: I took one last look at my mother and grandmother every day and left forever ... I saw 25 people × 100 pages on a website, and 1000 people felt psychological pressure. Visible, sober but not confused, sober but not confused, really hard to get. It was like an arrow through the heart, and I was very sad. Tears rolled down like broken pearls. Really feel sorry for these premature flowers! What I said today is from the bottom of my heart, and it is a deep communication. In my opinion, there is no better way to save the confusion and darkness of the mind. We should cherish it very much, life is rare, don't come to earth in vain and return empty-handed! The so-called transcendence is not the work of our brains, but the sublimation of the mind and the promotion of the spiritual realm, which can be completed in seven seconds. But some people have not improved their mentality for 70 years!
A 90-year-old man said, "No matter what happens, check yourself first!" So, when you are in pain, don't find fault with each other, no matter what their mentality and purpose are, even if they are right. This is a question that God tests my mentality. How should I answer this question correctly? We understand the truth of doing things and being human. We will never make the mistakes we made before. Not only has it not reached the point of confrontation with everyone, but it has also opened the door to happiness from now on. How nice it would be to be clean, happy and lucky every day! This is a great leap from hell to heaven, from selfishness to fraternity, from egoism to altruism, from ordinary people to saints! All the troubles, pains and tribulations in the world are life problems for God to improve, temper my mind and shape my personality. The so-called "character" is to pass the exam. Only through pain can I expand my great love, open my heart, hone my will, polish my eyes, achieve my life and cast my brilliant future. We should learn to be content and grateful. I can love everyone in the world widely and selflessly, including all my opposites; My heart is like the sea, wider than the sea. My heart is like the universe, integrated with the universe and the world. It can hold everything in the world, everyone in the world, the sun, the moon and the stars! In this world, the biggest thing is our heart; The smallest is our heart. Professor Peking University, the former chairman of China Calligraphy Association, was designated as "Rightist" in those years. A gentleman is very active when he criticizes Qi Gong. Later, when he saw Qigong, he felt very embarrassed. On the contrary, Qigong comforted him and said, "At that time, it was like acting. Let you play Zhuge Liang, let me play Ma Su, and the play will pass after singing. " From this point of view, how magnanimous and generous Qi Gong was to his critics and how thorough his understanding of life was! In real life, we will always be "a person who is free from vulgar tastes, a noble person, a moral person and a person who is beneficial to the people." At this moment, we are saints. We immediately realized this; No longer clinging to mistakes is awakening; No difference is wisdom; Being able to tolerate everyone is an achievement and an honor.
For decades, Mao and Liu have been very generous. Mao Zedong's grandson Mao Xinyu was promoted to major general. At the ceremony, Liu Shaoqi's son Liu Yuan awarded him this title. After Jiang Qing's daughter Li Na divorced, she took her young son back to Beijing to live alone. Life is very difficult. She only buys a dime of meat every day, and each person has a quilt, half covered and half covered. When I was short of money, I sold my beloved book to a second-hand bookstore. 12 Wang, who just finished his life behind bars, heard that Li Na was seriously ill and could hardly take care of herself. Despite her weak health, she often takes the old nanny to Li Na's house to take care of her, and also takes Li Na's seven or eight-year-old son Xiao Zhi out to play. When some people knew that she was pregnant with the grandchildren of Mao Zedong and Jiang Qing, they had mixed feelings. Although he experienced many hardships and troubles, Wang never complained about others and always maintained an optimistic and tolerant character. She promoted the close contact between Mao and Liu's descendants. She said, "I am the only elder in these two families. You are all my children and grandchildren. I can rest assured that you are all very well. " One night in the summer of 2004, Wang, who never entertained others, told his son Liu Yuan to have dinner with Li Na. During the dinner, Wang looked at the children kindly and asked about the Mao Anqing family.
Everything depends on our mentality. Before we know the truth, our hearts are like a wild horse that has not been tamed, kicking and jumping around, completely disobedient; After being tamed slowly, people can ride slowly, and after being tamed, they can pull the hood of the car, but they often kick people. After repeated taming for a long time, I finally took the initiative to pull the cart without kicking people, tamed my clothes and obeyed. This is a long and painful process of taming. We must tame our hearts like tigers. In fact, the tempering of our hearts is also such a long and painful process. According to Who's Who, adults are uncomfortable and comfortable but not adults. "God will do great things to the Sri Lankan people, and will certainly strain their bones and muscles, starve their bodies and skin, empty their bodies, confuse their actions, and get things they can't do." "Yesterday Xibo (Zhou Wenwang) was arrested (you) and played Zhouyi; Confucius (Hungry) Cai Chen wrote Spring and Autumn Annals; Qu Yuan exiled Li Sao; The blind (jve) in Zuo Qiu have Mandarin; The foot of Sun Tzu's Art of War is in the art of war; It's not Shu, but Lu Lan. Han Fei was imprisoned in Qin, "talking about difficulties, grief and indignation"; There are 300 poems, probably written by sages when they are angry. " Real family life and real social life are the melting pot of our hearts, and everyone can't escape. Heaven never shuts one door but he opens another, and the earth never shuts one door but he opens another, whether it is a king or a civilian; Whether rich or beggars; Male or female, unless you don't live on the earth, go to another planet and live alone. Phoenix nirvana in the fire, bright mind in the furnace. If you don't start from adjusting your mentality, I'm afraid your life will end with nothing-nothing! For the sake that we are not strangers, but real relatives, show your sincerity for everyone! Even if you can understand a little, you can benefit for life!
So no matter what happens, first of all, we should accept him with joy. Secondly, we should understand it in essence, from both yin and yang, and see through it; Don't be fooled by its illusion. What plays a decisive role is the change of our mentality, to put it more deeply, it is the grasp of our mind! What do you mean, seize the moment? He who grasps his "heart" all the time is a saint. Third, transform it. Transformation is to transform one's "heart", not another. For myself, my own egoism, this idea is to open the door of hell; For others, for the benefit of others, the idea is to open the door of heaven. This transformation is both hell and heaven! The change of this concept is the happiness, freedom and sublimation from ordinary people to saints. My heart has changed. Looking at each other, I am not angry, but grateful, grateful, grateful. Contentment and gratitude are the golden keys to happiness. It is everyone who has given us living conditions and space, given us the necessary food, clothing, housing and transportation, and the people are our true relatives. Without them, we can't live in this world. If everyone can be grateful, grateful for everything and always grateful, then happiness, happiness, auspiciousness and freedom will always be around us. Everything is pleasing to the eye and happy, then we are happy people. I sincerely hope that everyone in the world will be happy, safe and auspicious!
In the journey of life, you are bound to experience a lot of pain and suffering. The Tang Priest learned the scriptures, and after 81 difficulties, it was difficult to kill. Experienced cold, not afraid of cold, experienced pain, not feeling bitter. Only great love can relieve pain; Only understanding can eliminate troubles; Only tolerance can dissolve hatred. Life is a spiral process from confusion to awakening. Never know yourself just to know yourself; From not knowing life to knowing life; From understanding life to thoroughly understanding life, we should constantly improve the level and realm of life. Everything in the universe is a combination of yin and yang, and the combination of yin and yang is harmony. In real life, we often put the two aspects of Yin and Yang in opposition, which is contrary to the law of development of things and artificially creates contradictions and opposites. Can our hearts be calm? Can the world be harmonious? So never talk about a problem from one point, but from two points, and then look at the same thing from multiple angles. We should put ourselves in others' shoes, and put ourselves in others' shoes, so as not to be too persistent and stubborn.
If we regard our heart as a water cup and the pain of life as ten tons of salt, can a small water cup hold ten tons of salt? Obviously not. If we enlarge our heart to a swimming pool of 100 cubic meter, we can hold ten tons of salt. Although the concentration is weak, it is still very salty. What if we enlarge our hearts to the Pacific Ocean again? Then no matter how much salt you put, it won't feel a little salty. Our hearts are enlarged, even in the vast ocean, not to mention the little troubles and pains in life. Our hearts are like the sea, and every pain is like a fleeting spray, which will leave us the brightest smile and the most beautiful brilliance! Only the combination of bitterness and sweetness is the real life, and life is to taste all the flavors in the world. This is my heartfelt words to everyone! I sincerely hope that everyone in the world will stay away from pain, get happiness and move towards glory!
Bits and sorrows in life are a seed in people's hearts, a harvest in life journey, a maturity of life experience and the inevitable result of the whole life! It is the real enjoyment of life to taste the dribs and drabs of bitterness and joy in life experience. I am willing to bear every pain for anyone, and I am more willing to share every happiness and joy with anyone! -This is our outlook on life, values and world outlook.
The earth is my mother, I will embrace the earth, the vast and beautiful vegetation is my hair, the endless river is my blood, the soil in vast expanse is my muscle, the white and lofty snow-capped mountains are my bones, the endless sea is my heart, fraternity is my eternal heart, and I am one with the earth; Blue sky is my father, and I will embrace blue sky. The sun, moon and stars are my brightest infinite cells. I am blue sky, white clouds and spring breeze. I have no obstacles. I fly freely in the universe and blend in with the blue sky. I found myself in the space-time coordinates-this is my real root, my real home! For better or worse; Whether it is pain or happiness; Whether it's thorns or flowers ... these are indispensable elements of our beautiful life and home. I will never waste my life. The whole value of our life is to help everyone get rid of all the pain as much as possible. Give everyone a spiritual fast food! Worry about the world first, and enjoy it later!
The effective way to eliminate troubles and pains is to use the famous sayings in life to remind yourself, explain yourself, hint at yourself, remind yourself and unlock yourself-that is, the process of awakening. Gradually cultivate your great love, understanding, contentment, gratitude and humility-this is the golden key to open the door to happiness! In fact, life is not lack of happiness and happiness, but lack of insight and love to find happiness and happiness! Who will open it? It can only be myself, I can't replace it. I'm just telling you the truth and giving you a way to unlock it. The concrete actions must be our own. He who tied the bell must untie the bell; The lock must be locked. When greed, hatred, arrogance, doubt, fame and fortune, jealousy, hatred, injury, revenge and murder arise, it is time to open the door of worry and pain, the door of mental death and the door of hell! The opening and closing mentioned above are all between our own minds. The environment is created by the heart, and the environment is changed by the heart. What a hell! My heart is in heaven! Laozi said: "Tao can be Tao, not surprising;" The name can be named. It's very famous. Confucius said, "Listen in the morning and die at night. "Thus, understand how important it is to be a man.
I sincerely hope that all of us can eliminate bad ideas and cut off wealth, sex and fame. Integrate theory with practice, speak with practice and learn with life. In particular, we should carefully handle the relationship with family, relatives, friends, neighbors and colleagues. Try to be more modest, more tolerant and more considerate of each other, and everything will be solved. If you persist in doing it for a long time, happiness and auspiciousness are just around the corner. I think in the near future, everyone will get this magic weapon of happiness and auspiciousness. Don't do it for good, don't do it for evil, all evil should be pursued by all good. In this way, I found the true value of life, the origin of life and the foundation of my happiness!
Third, effective methods to adjust mentality and control emotions.
1, keep learning, know how to be a man, and cultivate your own heart of great love, tolerance and understanding. Improve the level and realm of your life. When a person has great love, a big mind and a big vision, troubles and pains will disappear.
2, often help others, you will get inner happiness; This kind of happiness will offset your negative emotions.
3. It's better to talk to intimate friends and you than to study for ten years. If the effect is good, a communication can eliminate the inner troubles and pains accumulated for many years and quickly open the window of the soul. From "there is no doubt that there is no way out" to "another village with a bright future"
4, thermal problems, cold treatment. Don't rush to deal with problems when you are angry. It's easy to be irrational at this time.
5. Put yourself in the other person's shoes, and you may have a good answer.
6. Adjust your living habits and don't do meaningless things. Such as gambling, games, etc. Early to bed and early to rise. Sleep no less than 5 hours every day.
7. Exercise properly and go for a walk in the suburbs and by the water. Anger is an imbalance between yin and yang. Regulating fire with water and drinking more water are all effective methods.
8. Eat little or no meat and fried food; Eat more vegetables with high water content. Especially don't drink or smoke. These things make people lose their minds and are harmful to health.
9. Self-control, self-adjustment and self-unlocking. Chinese medicine says: anger hurts the liver, sadness hurts the lungs, and shock hurts the kidneys. Calm and harmless.
10. Listening to soothing and beautiful music can adjust your mood.
1 1. Read a useful proverb every morning. For example, there are troubles every day, and there is no nature if you don't pick them up; Why should I worry about such a trivial matter? I want to melt myself and the whole world with love.
12, get up every day and sing a song that is good for your health.
13, don't be too full every meal, eat 7 to 8 to achieve good results; Eating too much has a heavy burden on the stomach, and cerebral ischemia will make you feel groggy and easy to do confused things.
14, sit quietly for a while every day and let go of your body and mind. You will gain great wisdom and handle things very rationally.
15, change your way of thinking, don't be too stubborn and rigid; There must be both principle and flexibility.
16, ask more, listen to other people's opinions and suggestions, and think twice before you act.
17. Close your eyes and sit for a while every night or every week to reflect on your words and deeds for a day or a week. Those mistakes, those that are inappropriate, need to be corrected. Confucius said that it makes sense for me to visit three times a day.
18, your body and mind are your own masters, don't follow the trend and follow the fashion; Many trends and fashions can't stand the test of time and history and are wrong.
19, life goes through three levels: wealth, sex and power. Indifferent to fame and fortune, greed is the root of all evil.
20. From filial piety to washing feet to serving parents, to "old and young, young and young."
2 1. Look at the online China traditional culture forum, which is of great benefit and may change the troubles and pains of a lifetime.
Fourth, the proverbs of harvesting happiness
A thousand words, the most important thing is to change your foothold in life, jump out of your own small circle and enter everyone's big circle, and everything will be perfect and auspicious. The reason why we suffer is that our selfish and self-centered thoughts are too heavy. Let go of our own selfish interests and ourselves, and we will have a big mind, big thinking, big vision, big tolerance, great love and great happiness. We can't see through the truth of this world all our lives, and we can't be happy all our lives if we can't let go of ourselves; Understand the truth of being a man today, and be happy today; Understand the truth of being a man tomorrow and be happy tomorrow.
Everyone longs for happiness, and everyone wants to have happiness. In fact, happiness is not far away from us, just around us, just between our thoughts, happiness will return to the original point. Najib, a developmental psychologist in university of dundee, England, found that when two people interact, such as an affectionate eye, a sincere smile, a sincere hug, a handshake and a pat on the other's shoulder. It took three seconds, but I sowed the seeds of happiness in others' hearts, and it was myself who finally harvested happiness. Therefore, the switch of happiness is in your own hands. Spend another three seconds, maybe you can switch your mood to the happy channel. When frustrated, I said: I will never be depressed, I am the most confident, take a deep breath, hold my head up and stand up, and happiness will grow in my heart; When you feel pessimistic and the future is bleak, take three seconds to shout: I will never feel inferior. Let the sadness go with the air. Maybe you can remind yourself to wake up from pessimism and see the world in another way. Before lovers go out, spending three seconds hugging each other may bring a good mood for the day; When you meet your neighbors, even if you are not so familiar with them, you may get a friendship by saying hello for three seconds. Of course, when angry, say: Why should I be angry about such a trivial matter? Then pause for three seconds, maybe you can solve a catastrophe. My friend, please hold on to every thought. Every three seconds, you are not far from immortality.
The laws of the universe and nature tell us that all people in the world are our relatives; The law of yin and yang tells us that fate is in our own hands, and the golden key to happiness is great love; Everything in nature is moving and changing. Our human destiny is also changing. As trees are, so are fruits. Dialectics tells us that the rigid and inherent self-centered thinking mode and thinking mode formed by human beings for a long time need to be changed! Do the world of mortals with the heart of dust! Seek out tirelessly, and you will never find happiness; Only by digging deep into your soul can you find the golden key to happiness from suffering! This is the only way to really get rid of suffering and have fun! Happiness is to change your mind and tide over the difficulties with a flick of your finger. Love has opened a new world, full of happiness, auspiciousness and joy. "Love is my heart, and heaven and earth help you succeed!" These proverbs of life are the price of countless lives and blood for your reference. I sincerely hope that everyone in the world will weave a beautiful and glorious life aura with their love; Create a brilliant and beautiful vision; Everyone lives happily, happily, with sunshine and good luck!
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