I suddenly received a message from my ex-girlfriend. Can I reply?

As for whether to reply to your ex’s message, the key lies in what kind of relationship you want to maintain with your ex:

If you are determined to cut off contact with your ex and do not want to have anything to do with your ex, If there is any relationship, then treat this message as spam, delete it, block it, or turn a blind eye. And once you reply, your ex will invade your life again, and all your previous efforts to forget your ex will be in vain.

If the content of the message is business, such as asking you a certain question or consulting something, and you can't avoid it, then don't be coy and just handle the matter honestly and directly. . When you are communicating about this matter, don't go off topic while chatting, but discuss the matter as it is and do business in a matter-of-fact manner.

Remember one thing: it’s your ex’s business to send you messages, and it’s up to you to decide whether to reply or not. You have broken up, and you don’t owe your ex anything. If you don’t want to reply, don’t reply. Don’t force yourself to reply to messages out of guilt and self-blame.

If you want to reply, how can you reply more appropriately?

Replying to your ex is a very delicate matter. There are some things that can be said and some things that cannot be said. On your own terms, if you are going to reply, what should you reply to? Remembering the following precautions will help you respond more appropriately:

First, be polite. Your affairs have come to an end, so don't dwell on the past anymore. Even if you still have resentment in your heart, you should still show your grace and self-cultivation at this time. If the wording and tone of your reply are sour and bitter, you will appear petty. If you reply like this, it's better not to reply at all, because you will definitely feel angry after replying. It's not worth being sulky again for someone who has nothing to do with you for a long time.

Secondly, if your ex’s message is about reminiscing about the past, or even bluntly saying that he misses you very much, even if you are thinking about getting back together at this time, you must not hit it off immediately and start chatting warmly with your ex immediately to get back together. Go warm. It's gratifying if two people both want to renew their relationship, but at this time you need to stay sober and calm, think about the reason why you broke up in the first place, and think about whether this reason has been resolved now. If not, even if you get back together, you will make the same mistakes again after a while. Therefore, solving the problem that caused you to break up first is the most important thing at the moment, and everything else must come later.

Third, don’t mince words when speaking, be honest and straightforward. If your ex sends you a message, it’s very likely that he wants to get back together with you. If you don’t want to get back together, you have two ways to deal with it: 1) Don’t reply, continue to give up on your ex, and continue to give up; 2) Reply, but sincerely tell him that you don’t want to get back together, and don’t give him anything because you are afraid of hurting your ex’s heart. Give an ambiguous reply to mislead your ex into thinking you still have a chance. If there is no chance, there is no chance. You dragging your ex along like this is not kind, but cruel.

Fourthly, when some exes send messages, they will not write the specific content, but will tentatively ask something like "Are you there?" Faced with such a message with unclear intentions, if you want to reply, you might as well ask directly, "I'm here, what's the matter?" Once you ask this, your ex will be embarrassed to continue testing and will reveal your true intentions faster. Your ex is a thing of the past, so don’t play ambiguous mind-guessing games with your ex. Only by understanding your ex's intentions can you know what to do next, instead of being entangled with your ex indefinitely.