What should I do if my husband cheats?

There are two most favorable outcomes.

First, if he doesn't divorce, he will return to his family, and he will focus on you and your children in the future, be loyal to his family, know how to take care of you and be responsible for his family;

Second, divorce, the child is yours, the property is yours, and he can respect your lifestyle after divorce.

No matter which of the above two results you want, you must first do the following two things:

1, stay calm.

When I find my husband cheating, I am most afraid to find him and a third party. Because it will make you passive in the future.

Betrayed, people's emotions must be very intense. At this time, you may only have one mood-revenge them.

But this kind of mood, in addition to making you feel good at that time, will also be very unfavorable to your follow-up treatment.

Because this will first make you look embarrassed, and even others will think it is appropriate for your husband to cheat, because you are a bitch. People who support you may have begun to sympathize with your husband.

When you are finished, the best result is that your husband apologizes, admits his mistake, promises to pay it back later, and then you forgive him. But such promises are all lip service, and so is your forgiveness. This hurdle in your heart will never cross. People who are betrayed will have psychological trauma. You will distrust him, be sensitive and suspicious, and your heart will hurt when he talks to others. It hurts when he looks at others outside. But you can't ask him for anything because you forgive him. If you doubt him again, he will say, you said you have turned the page, why not mention it? Is that all you got to say

Finally, if you make trouble, you may scare him. He made a mistake here, and he began to delete chat records and photos there. You can't prove that he really made a mistake. Whether you are divorced or not, you are the one who suffers from the dumb loss.

So, don't make trouble, stay calm and buy yourself space and time. You should use this time to heal your psychological trauma first, and then consider whether to divorce or repair your relationship in a relatively rational state.

Step 2 collect evidence

Whether you want to divorce or not, you must collect evidence. Because:

First, you can divide more property during divorce to protect the legitimate rights and interests of you and your children;

Second, when you have evidence, you can confront him.

How to collect evidence?

First, collect the chat records of husbands and third parties;

Second, collect the monitoring of the husband and the third party entering and leaving the community together;

Third, master intimate photos and videos of husbands and third parties.

Fourth, try to get her husband to admit cheating, and record or write down the commitment letter.

Article 663 of 202 1 Civil Code stipulates that if the gift seriously infringes on the legitimate rights and interests of the donor or the donor's close relatives, the gift may be revoked. That is to say, during the marriage, the husband gave the property belonging to two people to a third person without his wife's permission, which seriously violated his wife's legitimate rights and interests, so the wife has the right to revoke the gift.

In other words, with the evidence, you can get back the money that originally belonged to you. And with the evidence, he can be legally recognized as the wrong party, so if you two really want to divorce, whether it is the division of property or the struggle for child custody, you have the initiative.

If you two don't divorce, with the evidence, you can confront him, make him really realize how much damage this has caused to you and your family, and then he can do it when he comes back, instead of just saying nothing.

These two steps are finished. Whether you want to go or not depends on your own needs.

I'm Zhou Xiaopeng, a marriage counselor. If you have marital emotional confusion, please leave a message in private ~