There is a little joke about wallet. Does anyone know?

Defense lawyer: "Your honor, I want to remind you that it is very unfair for my client to be accused of being a thief! He just came to new york a week ago and hardly knows the way. More importantly, he can only speak a few words of English. "

The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?"

The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!"

A lady lost her purse while shopping, and an honest boy found it and returned it to her. The lady looked at her purse and said, "Gee, this is interesting. When I lost my wallet, there was a 20 yuan banknote in it, and now it has become 20 1 yuan banknotes. " The little boy immediately replied, "Yes, last time I helped a lady find her lost wallet, but she didn't have any change as a reward ..."

A diplomat has long heard that thieves in a certain country are fierce. Once he went to the street and had an empty wallet in his pocket. There is a small note in the wallet, which reads a line of small words: "It is a pig who steals the wallet!" " "He thought, this will certainly tease the thief. Walking around the street, he was careful and didn't find any thieves patronizing. He was disappointed and thought, "How clever the thief is, it's just a name. "When he got home, he took out an empty wallet and tore up a piece of paper, only to find that the original word had been altered into:" Grandpa stole the pig's wallet today! " "entertainment

My wallet was cut in the hospital. Is it really useless for my girlfriend to scold me?

Is this it?

Bras and wallets

One day, a girl reported to the police that a man had stolen her wallet. The policeman asked her: How did he steal your wallet? The girl said: I put my wallet in my bra, but I didn't feel him touch my wallet at that time.

Lost wallet

A lady lost her purse in a hurry while shopping at Christmas. An honest little boy found the wallet and returned it to her.

The lady looked at her purse and said, "Well, that's interesting. When I lost my wallet, there was a 20 yuan banknote in it, and now it has become 20 1 yuan change banknotes. "

The child immediately replied, "Yes, Miss. Last time I found a lady's wallet, but she didn't have any change to give me a reward. "

Pigs steal wallets.

A diplomat has long heard that thieves in a certain country are fierce. Once he went to the street and had an empty wallet in his pocket. There is a small note in the wallet, which reads a line of small words: "It is a pig who steals the wallet!" " "He thought, this will certainly tease the thief. Walking around the street, he was very careful and didn't find any thieves patronizing. He was disappointed and thought, "How clever the thief is, it's just a name. "When he got home, he took out an empty wallet and tore up a piece of paper, only to find that the original word had been altered into:" Grandpa stole the pig's wallet today! " "

wallet

The bus in the morning is the most crowded. A beautiful lady finally got on a minibus, but the narrow space prevented her from taking out the fare from her bag smoothly. So, she had to grope for money with her hands. She unzipped her bag and put her hand in, but she couldn't find her wallet. Then she shouted, "My God, someone stole my wallet!" " "Everyone in the car noticed her, especially a middle-aged lady standing in front of her. She glanced at the beautiful lady and warmly reminded her: "Please note, miss, you can't find your wallet in my bag. "

Wallet anti-theft strategy, laughing to death

In fact, my wallet has been robbed 749 times and stolen 998 1 time, but it is the same every time. Three days at most, it's all the same. The point is that I have a lot of "treasures" in my wallet. Hey ~ ~ Do you want to see what's so amazing?

1, notification of advanced cancer (indicating remaining 30-90 days of life)

2. Letter to my girlfriend (stamped)

3. Unpaid chemotherapy bill (the amount is 50,000 yuan, remember that it must be unpaid).

4. A donation invoice for Hope Project (with the amount of 50,000 yuan and the signature of "Thunder Bee")

5, water and electricity bills to remind the phone to stop a notice.

6. Organ Juan gave a consent form.

7. Five business cards with personal addresses (title: member of the International Voluntary Demining Organization)

My wallet was robbed 50 times the day before yesterday, and I sent it back yesterday.

After counting the money, 500 yuan added a note, which read as follows:

Brother, I respect you, a good man who is enthusiastic about the society!

Knowing that you are ill, I offer 500 wishes to help you.

Don't worry! This is all the clean and hard money I earned by working as a pole for a week.

May good people live a safe life!