Question: What funny messages do you have (the more the better)?

Because of you, I believe in fate; Because of you, I believe in fate; Maybe all this is predestined by heaven, which brings us together in some way. I really want to say ... what did I do in my last life?

No matter where you are, just smile at the sky and shout "I am a beauty" three times, and I will appear in front of you.

In the morning, you approached my bed gently and kissed my face affectionately. Your deep eyes have been staring at me, and I really can't refuse you-"Good dog, take you for a walk".

The vast sky makes you fly high, beautiful stories are interpreted by you, kind children have to chase them, and humorous messages are sent to the little turtle! ! !

Notice of transfer: We have transferred RMB 200,000 to your account as required, please confirm it within 2 seconds, otherwise the transfer will be invalid.

There is a tacit understanding called tacit understanding, a feeling called wonderful, a yearning called longing, and an idiot who will finish reading the message!

Forward this message three times and you will be lucky; Forward it 6 times and you will be official; Forward 10 times, and you will be lucky; Forward it 20 times and spend 2 yuan!

It's too late, your mobile phone has been infected with April Fool's Day virus, alas …

I'm sending you this dime message to tell you that I'm not a penniless person. For example, this dime message is my birthday present to you. Don't forget to invite me to dinner tonight.

Dear mobile phone users, in order to keep you awake on April Fool's Day (1), we provide quick wisdom books as long as you insist on reading "RMB $ &；; You can learn it after ten times.

I insured you 20 thousand yuan today to have a safe April fool's day. How interesting! The insurance company will send someone to send you the insurance policy and invoice ... Oh, I forgot, this 20,000 premium was paid by you.

Poor mobile phone user, it's a pity that you are infected with April Fool's Day bacteria because you confirmed this short message. Now bacteria are wearing uniforms, full of energy, neatly arranged, and walking through your body with vigorous steps. ...

I seem to see you jump on me happily and stick your head in my arms ... really! I'm so happy. I was just about to give you a birthday cake! Are you so happy? Still barking and wagging your tail at me?

People are getting more and more stiff, their faces are getting yellow, they are as white as soybean milk, and their lips are like brown sugar. So far, I haven't met anyone, but I must pretend to be strong. When I meet a girl like a wolf, I meet a buddy-I'm still like that.

Your income is low. Bill Gates took your wallet, too. Your face is very small. Annan's views are for your reference only. You said that the year is not busy and the people all over the country set off firecrackers. You have a better life than me. 13934388 * * 0.

49923, can you talk to me? In a bad mood, just because you quarreled with your friends! Do you know that?/You know what? I almost got into a fight with them because they said you looked like a monkey and some people said you looked like an orangutan. That's too much! They didn't treat you like a pig at all! zjinjin 19780

499 16 Although our personalities and ideas are quite different, I am still willing to try to marry you. If we are really not suitable for marriage, at least we will be suitable for divorce 13 139590 * * 0.

499 10 seldom costs you money, so you can spend it well. Pay my mobile phone fee first, then my water and electricity fee, winter heating fee, and then this information fee. 13535870 * * 0.

If there are no flowers, spring will be lonely, if there is no passion, the four seasons will be mediocre, if there is no me, you will lose someone who cares about you the most! Without you, the rabbit will ask, "Who should I compete with?" 13396595***0

Do you know how the pig died? Lazy as hell. Do you know how a fucking bear died? Stupid. Do you know how you died? I am so angry. 13592003***0

49888 Men and dogs: Men are like Baha 'i dogs at the age of 20, with sweet words in their mouths, and men are like watchdog at the age of 30, who are best at cooking and washing clothes. Men 40 are like mad dogs, they bite at the sight of beautiful women. 133 145 1 1***0

4988 1 the beauty of learning lies in confusing people; The beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; The beauty of a woman lies in being stupid without regrets; The beauty of a man lies in lying. 13789 13 1***0

Teacher Xiao Fang from kindergarten 49870 pointed to the children on the blackboard and tested M, A, Y, D and B pinyin. The children said in the most standard pronunciation: Touch Aunt tjj43 100.

Mosquitoes don't bite you, mad dogs don't bite you, flies don't touch you, and even mice avoid you. What a pity! Or am I nice to you, desperate to send text messages to annoy you to death. 13898396***0

49845 There is something wrong with cock and hen hatching chicks. The cock and hen look at the chicken. Silly chicken didn't pay attention to the information. 13790 18 1 * * 0.

I had a beautiful dream about your lovely face. You run hard in front and I chase hard behind. It was Cretaceous, and I caught dinosaurs with a gun. +0357 1860 * * * 0.

4983 1 money doesn't cost you money, you drive away without a car, you stand, you pick up if you are in trouble, you talk if you don't climb the mountain, and you leave when you are busy. No one is meaner than you. kqlr_kangli 19790

When I miss you, you are on the horizon, when I scold you, you are in front of me, when I call you, you go to the subway. Are you an idiot now? 13962962***0

498 14 You are skilled in martial arts, but you can't be proud. If you do this, you will no longer be a knight errant, knight errant and knight errant. +03962962 * * 0.

The beauty of 49800 learning lies in confusing people; The beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; The beauty of a woman lies in being stupid without regrets; The beauty of a man lies in lying. gfj_00 10

The beauty of 49794 learning is that people are confused; The beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; The beauty of a woman lies in being stupid without regrets; The beauty of a man lies in lying. 13805 1 19***0

Your first appearance brought tears to my eyes. I got close to your face and kissed you. Why do you always break my heart? Say: Who are you chasing again? 1352070 1***0.

49780 sends you a couplet: the first couplet is to miss you in the wind and rain; The bottom line is that I really love you. The horizontal recognition is that the information is wrong. 13986275 * * * 0.

49772, the night is long, and I can't sleep alone. Send a message to wish you a good dream tonight. But I guess you won't see it right away, because pigs are usually sleeping now!

Now watch CCTV 1. The White House was bombed and the whole building collapsed. The police have sealed off all of Washington. 19 people died, 32 people were injured, 1 1 people were missing, 1 people were deceived.

Find some leisure, find some time, and take a bomb to the bank. The police prepared a pair of handcuffs and the warden arranged a blanket. The troubles of life, talk to the warden, talk to the police about the details of the crime!

I have a request: invite me to dinner. I hope you can satisfy me, or I'll write your mobile phone number on the wall and add two words in front of it: apply for a certificate!

You should pay attention to your image in the future. You are an adult, don't be the same as before. Drink less wine. Last night, someone saw you chasing a pig with a glass and shouting, Are you a brother? If you are a brother, do it!

I dreamed that you were singing last night! Your singing is very sweet, and your sentimental expression touched me. I almost vowed to love you for 10 thousand years, but I dare not, because you are singing to a donkey: I will be you when I grow up!

In the middle of the night, there is no light in the toilet. You go to relieve yourself, fall into the toilet, fight with maggots, fight with shit, and no one saves you. You die heroically, live great and die silently. In memory of you, the toilet is equipped with lights.

Without the wind, the clouds will not move; Fish can't swim without water; If there is no sun, the moon will have no light; If it weren't for you ... stupid people wouldn't exist.

Worship heaven and earth, anger his wife; Second, worship Gao Tang and work hard for her; Husband and wife respect each other as guests, and then tighten their belts; Into the bridal chamber, I knelt on her bed and scrubbed. Hey! I am a sheep and she is a wolf.

Seismological station forecast: There will be a slight earthquake from tonight to tomorrow morning. For your safety, please sleep under the bed tonight, cover yourself with a quilt, put a toilet on your head and put a straw in your nose.

"Xiaohua was fired for cheating in the exam." "What happened?" "He counted his ribs during the physiological hygiene test and was found."

I have been by your side, worrying about you again and again. Are you full today? Did you sleep well? Will it be cold late at night? I always knew you couldn't take care of yourself. Every time I walk away, you jump out of the pigsty.

Standing under a tall building, I feel sad, my face is wet and it tastes a little salty. Is it rain or tears? Look up at the sky ... who is peeing upstairs!

The teacher asked the students how to write the word "dung", but the students forgot it for a while and had to say: It's on their lips, why can't they get out?

There are two rules for students: those who cheat twice during college and those who get married during college are advised to drop out of school. I have a bad heart, which is interpreted as: people who have been married twice in college advised him to quit school.

Diner: hello, miss, the amount of food here has decreased a lot recently. Attendant: It may be parallax, sir. Because the area of the hall has expanded.

There are stars and the moon hanging in the sky, the Goddess Chang'e flying to the moon has a lot on his mind, the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl are in love, the Moon Old Matchmaker is a myth, and there is a fool who doesn't talk and squints at the phone.

You are as kind as a cat, as loyal as a dog, as lovely as a bird, as knowledgeable as a horse, as brilliant as a butterfly, as hardworking as a bee, and like everything. No wonder everyone calls you … animal!

The Tang Priest was kidnapped by a mountain thief. In order to demand ransom, the burglar called the Monkey King's mobile phone, and the prompt sounded: the other party has flown out of the service area! He asked Tang Priest: What's the date of Pig Bajie? Tang Priest: I sent it a short message, and it's watching!

The world record "Gisney" was chosen as cheeky today. Pigs are less than one centimeter, hippos are only five centimeters. In the end, you won the championship-you had the cheek to congratulate! Congratulations!

When we were young, we didn't guess. I sing and you dance. I can sing 200 songs and you can dance 200 dances, so people affectionately call me 200 songs and you 200 dances!

If you receive this message, you just like me. If you delete it, you have a crush on me If you reply to the message, you just want to marry me. If you don't reply, you promise to marry me. If you modify it, it will be mine. If you save it, the rest of your life will be mine!

I dreamed of you last night: we walked by the river and snuggled together. You looked up at my eyes and spit out three words affectionately ... woof woof woof.

If the government stipulates that a person can only find one woman in his life, I would rather that person is you, and I have no regrets until I die! But the government has no regulations ... then forget it!

I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, the snow in the north of Saibei. Sorry, it's stuck.

Yesterday, I let a mosquito find you, let it tell you that I miss you very much, and let it kiss you for me, because now I can't get close to you! It will tell you how much I miss you! You asked me how much I love you? A pimple represents my heart!

Actor A anxiously looks for the director: Didn't you say that I should play the role of Wu Dalang? Why did you change people again? The director said impatiently, How many times have I told you that you are not tall enough to play Wu Dalang?