How can a girl with low self-esteem find a good relationship?

Hello everyone: I am the emotional creator Black Fox Emotion

Inferiority is a common emotional experience that everyone has, no matter who they are, whether they are adults, children, men or women , beggar bosses, geniuses and idiots all have a mentality of inferiority. It is the opposite of confidence and is an innate emotional state. So please don’t regard low self-esteem as a mental illness, but treat it with a normal mind.

1. How is inferiority complex formed?

Inferiority is not because you are not good enough, but because you want to be better in your heart, but you don’t believe you can do it well. You think you can’t do it.

Understand that your low self-esteem is caused by this thinking mode. As long as you change this thinking mode, you can change your low self-esteem mentality.

2. How to overcome inferiority complex?

Giving ourselves positive predictions, positive verbal expressions and psychological hints can affect our thinking habits and behavior patterns. When you think you can, your subconscious mind will mobilize all the energy and relationships to move closer in this direction until you actually achieve it.

3. How to use actions to change low self-esteem?

A negative attitude is: I think I can’t do it now, and I won’t be able to do it in the future;

A positive attitude is: I think I can’t do it now, but it doesn’t mean I can’t do it in the future. What methods can be adopted to change a certain condition so that I can become very good in the future.

Therefore, in a relationship, if the other person is willing to date you, it means that you have met his/her expectations of excellence, and you and he/she are equally matched and matched.

If you think you are "not good enough" for the other person, then through some hard work and growth, you can strengthen your belief that "I can" in your heart. You can make yourself stronger mentally, improve your emotional tolerance, improve your love skills, etc. through your study, career, and interpersonal relationships.

No matter what, first accept yourself and believe that it is reasonable for the other person to love you. This is the basis for mental health and the continuous growth of your relationship. No matter who you are with, please have a firm belief: "I am worth it"

It depends on the degree.

If we roughly divide self-esteem into three levels

"Extremely low self-esteem"

"Very low self-esteem"

"A little low self-esteem" ”

Girls with very low self-esteem suggest that it is best not to fall in love first.

Girls with extremely low self-esteem take more than three or two years to develop the word "extremely". Most of them come from their native families.

Most of these girls will disguise themselves very deeply. I even get used to it by pretending. I sincerely feel that I am so awesome, hard-working, and hard-working, that I am so unappreciated that my talents are so unappreciated. I am very likely to go to extremes when I see something. I feel that whatever I insist on is the right thing. I feel that I have embraced the whole world and that I am the great man.

When a girl like this falls in love, it is very beautiful at the beginning. Later, there will be more and more speculations, more and more worries about gains and losses, more and more demands, more and more dissatisfaction, more and more emotions, more and more conjectures, and all kinds of problems that will follow. There are more and more feathers...but what about boys? He is not God, and he is not your father.

There is no standard answer to the question of how girls with low self-esteem can fall in love successfully. Because it’s normal to have a little low self-esteem. And every normal person has his or her own feelings and standards regarding the standards for a good relationship. The same person at different stages has different expectations and pursuits for what is good, and what he wants to do better when he is good.

So is this love still a thing of the past?

Talk! Of course we have to talk!

If others say no to talking about it, you won’t talk about it?

If it feels like a heartbeat, just go for it!

There are thousands of beautiful skins

There are also thousands of interesting souls

Who doesn’t have this inferiority complex?

It’s just a matter of how many fields and what matters.

How to fall in love?

If you must give me a piece of advice

Just think of yourself as a flower.

Strive to bloom.

If flowers also have personalities, flowers will also feel inferior.

Then, flowers are still flowers.

The only thing to do is to work hard to bloom.

Write a slogan as a screensaver:

I am a trumpet (something) flower

I will (positively) work hard (enjoy) to bloom

< p> Thanks for the invitation, Brother Monkey!

I think that if a girl with low self-esteem wants to fall in love successfully, she should have more conversations to build up her confidence.

Since girls are allowed to fall in love, that is, have close contact with the opposite sex before marriage, what is the difference between having one date and two or three? Therefore, if a girl really has low self-esteem, then she might as well talk about it several times. Generally speaking, when boys pursue girls, many boys will pamper girls and hold girls up very high. In this process, girls can easily develop self-confidence. Once a girl gains confidence, it will be easier for her to fall in love.

1. Why do you feel inferior? If the reasons for low self-esteem can be changed, such as your own life and work skills, etc., then you must work hard to change and improve yourself so that you no longer feel low self-esteem and become more confident, otherwise you will deserve it.

2. Why do you have low self-esteem: If the cause of low self-esteem cannot be changed. For example, your appearance, height, etc., then try to change your negative emotions and concepts. If you can't control the weather, then you can control your mood, otherwise you will deserve it.

3. If you can change, you can take the initiative in dating. Then you can fall in love.

4. If you can’t change, you can continue to live in the same way.

5. If you find a confident boy, you can have a good relationship. They complement each other.

6. If you have low self-esteem and are nothing, then don’t be awesome deep down. People with low self-esteem often have ambivalence. The more they have low self-esteem, the more they want to eat swan meat. High-minded but low-handed.

Girls with low self-esteem have a relatively low success rate in dating. Maybe they have a fire in their hearts and just don’t know how to release themselves. The more people there are, the harder it is to let go, which is a slow-heating type. If you get along for a long time, you will realize that girls with low self-esteem have many advantages. I think a person's character development will not change easily. Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses. As long as you wait slowly, you will always meet a boy who likes you. The best couples are complementary. As long as you be yourself and learn to get rid of some of your shortcomings while waiting for Prince Charming to arrive, you can win the heart of the prince!

Inferiority may stem from family environment, life experiences, internal or external conditions, etc. Inferiority is a sign of lack of confidence in oneself. People who have an inferiority complex in relationships will despise themselves and think that they are not worthy of the other person, and the other person will not like them. Even if they get a relationship, they will always put themselves out of position. Very low, spending the whole day worrying about gains and losses.

How can a girl with low self-esteem find a good relationship? Solve it fundamentally, alleviate your inferiority complex, look directly at your feelings, and do the following:

Understand yourself correctly and encourage yourself.

Everyone’s existence in this world has meaning. Don’t deny yourself blindly and only see your shortcomings but not your strengths. Family conditions and our own external conditions are destined. Don’t deny or escape them. Try to accept them and change them through your own efforts. However, internal conditions including cultivation, wisdom, temperament, etc. are up to us. Gradually cultivated, the most tragic thing about a person is not having nothing on the outside, but being barren inside, living like a zombie. Try to say to yourself every day: "Come on, you can definitely do it!" People who are confident, hardworking, and energetic will be more respected and popular.

2. Understand emotions correctly and treat love bravely.

Many friends have a worry. Whoever confesses first will be humbler in the relationship? The answer is no.

A person who bravely expresses love and pursues love, a person who dares to face his heart, a person who dares to bear 50% of failure, who dares to say that such a person is humble? I once saw this sentence: I tell you that I like you, but I don’t necessarily want to be with you. I just hope that in the future, you will not be discouraged when you encounter a low point in life. At least someone has been attracted by your charm. It always was and always will be. Being brave enough to speak out about love is not humility, it is bravery, it is love.

Three, if you love others, you must also love yourself.

Love always comes so suddenly, and we who are not confident in ourselves want to use any means to keep it and manage it. However, as everyone knows, this kind of love often makes us not believe in "love" anymore. There are many people around them who are suitable for them, but they just turn a blind eye, always getting themselves bruised and bruised, loving someone they can't be with, and in the end they just move themselves. While loving others, we must love ourselves even more. Love in the beginning is always sweet. There are endless love words to say every day. You want to give everything you have, and you can't wait to take out your heart to let the other person see how sincere you are. It is often at this time that we need to stay rational. Love is equal and mutual. We depend on each other. When we love others, we must also love ourselves. This is not selfishness, but self-protection.

Conclusion

Inferiority is not terrible, nor is it impossible to change. The scary thing is that we are unwilling to change and remain unchanged in our own comfort zone. Recognize your own goodness and affirm yourself. Being humble does not mean love.

--END--

First of all, you have to find your own strengths and amplify them. Everyone has their own strengths, and you have low self-esteem because you compare your shortcomings with the strengths of others. When falling in love, you also need to keep a normal mind, don't compromise, and get along naturally. The society is so big and there are so many people. After all, you need to find a suitable person to love each other for a lifetime. Hope my answer can help you.

Actually, there is such a girl around me!

We have to analyze why girls have low self-esteem so that we can better find good ways and improve them.

First of all, the inferiority complex of girls is nothing more than the following points:

First, they have ordinary looks without any outstanding appearance, which leads to many girls having no self-confidence; second, they have introverted personalities. Not good at communication, resulting in a lot of words that cannot be said. My friend is like this, hiding everything in his heart, and he is turbulent on the inside, but calm on the outside. Third, family reasons may lead to low self-esteem, family difficulties, or poor living and economic standards. You will feel inferior in front of the people you like. Fourth, without knowledge, you will appear inferior when compared with others.

So how to overcome it? Everyone has their own life and their own choices. Since you want to win love,

First of all, you have to learn to dress up. This is very important. important. It starts with appearance, which is no joke. All men are good-looking. There is no doubt that there are no ugly women, only lazy women. Secondly, enrich your inner world, read more books, improve your temperament, and don’t have the idea of ??fishing for three days and drying nets for two days. Really, if you study more, you will slowly become knowledgeable and connotative, and your speech will improve. Few, moreover, they have their own life, work, social circle, harmony and three views. Appearance has little relevance in the later stage. Long-term relationship still relies on mutual attraction. Finally, work hard to improve yourself. The same goes for women, and they become financially independent. You will have more choices and have more courage to love.

***Mian! I hope that the person on my pillow is also my sweetheart!

If you feel inferior, you should focus all your energy on how to make yourself confident, rather than focusing all your energy on how to fall in love, because love is a matter between two people, and there are many conflicts. Uncertainty, if you have low self-esteem and attach too much importance to this relationship, it will often backfire and not be handled well.

Hello, I am Zhenzi. I have eight years of working experience in the emotional industry and focus on letting Chinese people enjoy love.

If my lover doesn’t reply to a message within 30 seconds, I will feel restless. If I don’t contact him for two hours, I will feel like the sky is falling. I wonder if he doesn’t love me anymore...

Oh my God! He handed the girl a tissue! It's over, it's over, has he changed his mind...

I'm always so uneasy in a relationship, what should I do?

In the famous attachment theory, there is a dimension of attachment characteristics called attachment anxiety:

Individuals with high attachment anxiety are extremely insecure in close relationships. They lack self-confidence and believe that they are not worthy of being loved. They are afraid of separation, so that the things they worry about are often imaginary.

In addition, they often get angry at their partners and use excessive emotional reactions to gain their partners' attention and love (Bowlby, 1982).

When they feel stressed, they not only rely on the other person to take care of themselves, but also rely on the other person's commitment and rely on this commitment to establish a sense of security.

For example, when two people quarrel, the person with high anxiety will often wait anxiously for the other party to apologize and stay, so that they feel: they are valued.

Is attachment anxiety really “hopeless”?

When it comes to attachment characteristics, we usually regard it as a relatively stable trait, and even attach it to people as a label: you are avoidant, I am anxious, and we often try to explore What are the characteristics of people with different attachment styles.

But in fact, the attachment characteristics of each person are not stable. New relationship experiences will constantly update our understanding of ourselves and others, thus affecting the individual’s position on different attachment dimensions ( Mikulincer & Shaver, 2016).

Often we believe that the best way to relieve attachment anxiety is to provide love and support and build a safe haven. That is what is commonly said: If you are insecurely attached, just find a securely attached person to fall in love with~

But recent research has discovered such a paradox:

Obtaining dependence and commitment from a partner in a short period of time can indeed alleviate an individual's current anxiety level, but in the long run, this actually strengthens attachment anxiety (Arriaga et al., 2014).

This means that safe dependence and stable commitment are not a panacea, but a "drug" that can relieve our anxiety in the short term, but will cause greater dependence.

When people with attachment anxiety use breakup as a threat, their partner's recovery and attention immediately and effectively relieve the anxiety, making the people with attachment anxiety feel loved, but at the same time it also makes their The "addiction" is getting deeper and deeper, and I may use this method more often to get my partner's attention in the future.

A person with attachment anxiety may face a breakdown if one day their partner gets tired and stops trying to win over them.

What exactly can improve attachment anxiety levels?

Some orphans, or children who were abandoned by their parents early in life, will act excessively rebellious after being sent to new foster families. They are constantly testing their adoptive parents: Are you the same? Will you abandon me?

Similarly, when you are in love, blaming the other person, breaking up, or abusing yourself...the real voice behind these behaviors is: See if he will really love me.

People with attachment anxiety always doubt whether they are worthy of being loved, which is the root of the problem.

Therefore, if you want to reduce attachment anxiety in an intimate relationship in the long term, the best way is not to get your partner’s attention, but to relieve your over-reliance on your partner and enhance your sense of self-worth (Arriaga et al., 2017 ).