Joke Collection Website - News headlines - For five years, he has been thinking about her husband's phone number for five years, and he can still answer what TV series her daughter plays.
For five years, he has been thinking about her husband's phone number for five years, and he can still answer what TV series her daughter plays.
1998, Guo Haiping and Su Chun, who just graduated from college, dragged simple luggage to their new home. Their home is just an attic, with an area of about 10 square meter. The bathroom and kitchen are used by neighbors. Su Chun couldn't help thinking of owning a house of his own in the studio ... Pinghai teased Su Chun for his whimsy and laughed and rolled into a ball with him. At night, the phone in the room rang and Pinghai jumped up to pick it up. That's her mother. Guo's mother asked about his marriage and talked about his sister seaweed, who is preparing for the college entrance examination.
Guo's mother wants to keep her little daughter with her, but wants her sister to live in Jiangzhou with her in a big city. Finally, seaweed got her wish and was admitted to Jiangzhou University. Pinghai welcomes her sister happily. Four years have passed in a blink of an eye, and seaweed is facing graduation, but it is difficult to find a job. Pinghai said that she didn't want to be a frog in the well, and encouraged her sister to make a foothold in this city as long as she worked hard. In the evening, Pinghai persuaded Su Chun to let her sister live with her until she found a job. The already small room was inconvenienced by the arrival of seaweed, but Su Chun was still considerate. Pinghai was angry with her narrow neighbor and encouraged seaweed to compete. Soon seaweed found her first job, and the three of them celebrated happily.
When seaweed moved out of this small room, Su Chun and his wife enjoyed their first intense tenderness in months. They couldn't help sighing that it was time to buy a house for themselves after seven years' struggle in this city. Just after work, a sudden thunderstorm trapped seaweed. At this time, a handsome boy, holding an umbrella, rushed to protect her and shut her up at home. He is David Beckham, a colleague who works in the same building as Haizao. He learned from the text that his interest in seaweed has a long history. Unconsciously, Pinghai was pregnant, and her bulging belly reminded them of the urgency of buying a house. Pinghai and Su Chun came to a residential area. The sound of airplanes suggested the remoteness of this area, but the soaring housing prices could only drive them here. Pinghai firmly said that the house must be repaired for the birth of the child.
Second set
A second-hand house is very crowded. Pinghai and several couples are looking at the house. Pinghai looked at her growing belly, and she felt that she needed to prepare a home for her child before he was born. Another second-hand house. When bidding, Pinghai and his wife suddenly added 40 thousand yuan to the reserve price, thinking that the house was sold. Su Chun suddenly received a phone call from the owner, saying that the house was not for sale, and the deposit would be returned to them unless they added 50,000 yuan. This price is far beyond the affordability of this couple. Pinghai was very angry when she saw that the house in her hand was gone, and seaweed had to try to comfort her. The baby was born as scheduled. In order to take care of her daughter and newborn granddaughter, Guo's mother came to Jiangzhou.
Three adults and one child can only live in this small space. Seeing this situation, Guo's mother suggested taking her granddaughter back to her hometown to take care of her. After all, the vast environment is conducive to the growth of children. The relationship between seaweed and Beckham is also heating up. Girls are talking about famous brands, but only when there is a discount can seaweed dare to go shopping and have a look. On a busy morning, Pinghai couldn't find the key before going out. Su Chun joked that there was nothing in such a small house, which aroused Pinghai's imagination of the house.
A series of pressures eventually led to the outbreak of Pinghai. She complained to Su Chun that it was better to marry well than to do well. Su Chun just kindly comforted her and made her smile. In the evening, Pinghai finally looked forward to calling her daughter. Because long-distance calls are expensive, Su Chun pinched her watch and urged her to end the call quickly. Hang up the phone, Pinghai could not help but shed bitter tears. After all, no mother will miss her own flesh and blood. She suggested buying a computer for her mother's house, which could save a lot of internet phone bills. I can think of the money to buy a computer, which is half a square meter! In order to get closer to her dream and let her daughter come here as soon as possible, Pinghai can only give up this idea.
Episode 3
Seaweed seems to have adapted to the rhythm of this city, quit her last job and is waiting for job hopping. Although the work is suspended, love makes seaweed very satisfied. She happily told her sister that she would go home with Beckham on National Day and formally meet his parents. Seaweed can't help joking that many relationships in the world are because the daughter-in-law can't pass the mother-in-law, so don't be too happy. During the National Day holiday, Pinghai can finally go back to his hometown to see his daughter. She is frugal in buying things for her daughter, and she can carry small packages of toys and clothes home.
Pinghai was dusty and finally returned to his hometown. On the electric carriage in the street, Pinghai saw her long-lost daughter, and restrained maternal love broke out instantly. From the moment we met, Pinghai seemed to forget herself. She had to pay attention to Ran Ran, feed her, wash her feet, and coax her with the only skill in her memory, but she didn't realize that her daughter had actually grown up in those separate times.
Su Chun was puzzled by her sudden decision, and Pinghai's aggressiveness suddenly softened. Because of the separation of children, she can't enjoy the feeling of being a mother. Pinghai struggles with the trivia of life every day, but seaweed still enjoys the romance of young people. On Tuesday, Beckham and I woke up in a warm love nest. I lie in bed and don't want to go to work, but I discuss the meaning of life with Beckham who is going to work. Reluctantly, seaweed came to work. Her new job is working in a real estate company. Young and beautiful, naturally called out by the boss to socialize, which is what seaweed hates most. On this day, the boss informed her that she would have dinner with her clients in the evening, and seaweed suddenly became depressed. Beckham's song on MSN swept away her mood. Seaweed can't help but think that no matter how much trouble, as long as I think of Beckham, it's all over. Besides her parents and sister, he is her most important person. At dinner in the evening, customer secretary Song heard that seaweed was 25 years old! Unmarried! Boasting that the future is boundless, seaweed is very disapproving. On weekends, Pinghai urged Su Chun to get up and make a long-distance call to borrow money from his parents to buy a house. Su Chun was very embarrassed.
The fourth episode
Pinghai's family, Su Chun, was rushed to the unit by his wife to ask for money, and there was nothing he could do. Seaweed and Beckham look after plants at home, fighting and kissing me. As usual, seaweed still left Beckham for his sister's house. When David Beckham saw seaweed leave, he couldn't help throwing up a charming face, which made seaweed laugh. Pinghai met her sister and mentioned that she wanted to borrow 20 thousand yuan to buy a house. Seaweed agreed. The seaweed deposit is not enough. When I got home and asked about Beckham's deposit, my heart fell to the ground when I learned that Beckham agreed to borrow money. In the old house where Pinghai lived, the neighbors were very excited because they learned that the house would be demolished. Li Nainai started a discussion. Li Nainai told his son and daughter-in-law that he would never move away. The old house has the advantages of the old house, why should it be cheap for developers? Before going to bed, seaweed told Beckham about borrowing money from his sister's room, and Beckham put his heart on the table. He said, after all, they need money in the future, such as getting married, buying a house and having children. Although Pinghai is so important to seaweed, it is themselves and their babies who will accompany seaweed all their lives in the future. Seaweed can't refute this emotional statement. Early in the morning, Secretary Song's family was busy eating breakfast. We can see that Song Siming actually has a happy family, a virtuous wife and a clever daughter who has gone to middle school. The rich environment just confirms the flourishing of his career.
Episode 5
Mrs. Wang invited friends at home, and Aunt Xu worked very hard late. She discussed with Mrs. Wang whether it is a waste to throw out the leftovers every day and whether she can take them home to eat. Mrs. Wang agreed, but you are welcome to say that this is also a disguised salary increase. Aunt Xu took the leftovers home, and her husband thought she was spending money on food. She was very dissatisfied, and Aunt Xu felt even worse. From then on, she only looked at the new house, and Pinghai urged Su Chun to ask his parents for money. When the leader in charge of registering the demolition population came to Li Nainai's house, Li Nainai made it clear that she was determined not to move, leaving the visitors speechless. Later, they discussed that they must use strategies to break down these households one by one. At the weekend, Song Siming connected seaweed to his car, so that he could be with the girl he had been infatuated with since the first meeting. It seems that he is young again. At this time, Pinghai called again to ask about the money. It is difficult for seaweed to raise money. She is afraid to tell her sister the truth. Without further ado, Song Siming took out money and lent it to seaweed, so that seaweed could think of itself as a big brother.
Sixth set
Another weekend, Song Siming was awakened by his daughter and wife. After his daughter's school activities, he was asked to accompany her to the concert of S.H.E., but he didn't know who S.H.E. was. Her daughter laughed at him for being old. Washing in front of the mirror, thinking of his daughter's banter, he actually had a strong impulse to see seaweed. He has been thinking about this girl since he met her, and I don't know what makes him so emotional. Mrs. Wang feels that the appetite at home is getting less and less recently. She suspected that Aunt Xu had deducted the food money and decided to buy food herself in the future. Seeing that she didn't get any benefits, Aunt Xu was dissatisfied and quarreled with her. On the last day, she decided not to do it, and Mrs. Wang did not keep it. When the new community opens, the developers are full of momentum. There are so many people buying houses that even the hall will be packed. Seaweed and Pinghai were pushed around in the crowd as if they were going to be submerged. Everyone snapped up, but it was not their turn to buy a good house. The two of them can only leave disappointed. My family, Aunt Xu and his wife are going through the household registration book. Because they were afraid that they would be too late to get any benefits, Li Nainai was calm and determined not to move.
Seventh set
Song Siming silently sent seaweed home all the way, and a deep bitterness soaked seaweed's heart. When I got home, I saw Beckham sleeping alone in the bed. Seaweed feels lonely and sweet. When Pinghai watched the real estate advertisement in the office, she was very angry and complained to her colleagues about the irrationality of the real estate industry. My colleagues in the company are getting married, and everyone is trying to dodge in order to save money on gifts. Seeing that a big government project is about to start bidding, Chen Sifu is as anxious as a cat on hot bricks. Song Siming suddenly disappeared recently. Without the guidance of insiders, Chen Sifu has no direction in his heart. I wanted seaweed to listen to the news, but she refused. I can't help myself. I don't know how to offend this famous Song secretary. Chen Sifu came to Song Siming's office with the tender. How did he know that the other party was cold-faced, as if all his previous attentions were in vain?
Song Siming told him coldly that you can't concentrate all your thoughts on the fork in the road when doing business. Chen Sifu realized where the problem was, and he still wanted to invite seaweed out when he got back. Seaweed knew that she still had to face Song Siming, and felt that if she wanted to keep her distance from him, she couldn't owe him one more favor. When she got home, she asked Beckham for money, saying that she borrowed someone else's money for her sister, and now the other party urged her to ask for it. Beckham immediately took out his savings and said that he had finally figured it out and could understand the feelings of the seaweed sisters. In order to calm the sea, he is willing to take out part of his savings. Seaweed hugged Beckham and burst into tears, and all the grievances at work were vented. Only she knows the smell best. In order to save money, Pinghai's living standard can only decline, and they eat pickled mustard tuber noodles almost every day.
Eighth set
Seaweed received last month's salary slip and called Pinghai in doubt. Now, she is at leisure and has no entertainment, but her salary has risen to 5000 yuan. Seaweed doesn't know what medicine the boss is selling in the gourd. Pinghai tells her not to worry. Chen Sifu firmly believes that Song Siming has an affair with seaweed. Since the boss doesn't like his woman going out to social parties, he doesn't mind keeping a lover for Song Siming as long as he is happy. The relationship between Song Siming and Chen Sifu has gradually slowed down, but seaweed has disappeared in many social occasions, which is disappointing. Seaweed work is not going well, but Beckham's greetings are always around. They often walk around the community. Even this monotonous walk can be arranged by Beckham. At noon that day, Beckham called about seaweed and said that he would go to a secret place at night. In the evening, Beckham took seaweed to the aquarium to celebrate their 500-day acquaintance. Seaweed surrounded by sea water and all kinds of fish is very excited. Beckham always makes her feel happy and happy. When the house leaks, it will rain all night, and the bike that Pinghai saved up to buy was stolen.
Episode 10
Pinghai wrote a string of numbers in a flash in her dream and tried to buy lottery tickets. As a result, none of the numbers guessed the right position. Chen Sifu went to Song Siming, and Song Siming asked Chen Sifu to cut the gordian knot and make efforts to improve the land. Pinghai finally paid for the house. When Su Chun admitted that he borrowed money from a usurer after paying the money, Pinghai cried angrily. Pinghai decided to divorce Su Chun. She went to complain to seaweed and Beckham, and seaweed asked Beckham to persuade Su Chun. In the dialogue between Su Chun and Beckham, Pinghai and seaweed, Su Chun Pinghai taught Beckham and seaweed their views on love and marriage. Seaweed asked Beckham to take out the money and give it to Pinghai. Beckham didn't agree, so they quarreled. Seaweed has no choice but to go to Song Siming.
Episode 12
Song Siming couldn't help missing seaweed, so she went to find seaweed. Song Siming took seaweed to a hotel in the suburbs and had sex with seaweed ... At this time, Mrs. Song and David Beckham were anxiously waiting for their other half, but neither of them knew that their beloved would betray themselves. After that, both seaweed and Song Siming seemed at a loss. They felt that what happened at night was not calm, and seaweed felt that his dirty body was not worthy of Beckham's love. Soon, Song Siming sent 60,000 yuan for seaweed. As a result, seaweed felt relieved and relaxed. ...
Episode 16
The director of the neighborhood Committee earnestly advised Mrs. Li to move, but Mrs. Li refused to eat hard or soft and insisted on moving to a big house. Through Mark's introduction, Pinghai accepted another student, Masao. Although Masao's foundation is poor and Pinghai is not very confident about attending classes, Pinghai insists on attending classes in order to buy a house. However, it also rejected the manager's overtime request. Finally, after a big quarrel with Pinghai, the manager let Pinghai run, and Pinghai had the idea of resigning. Fortunately, Su Chun earned 1 000 yuan by painting, which is a good news. Seaweed gradually became Song Siming's lover. ...
Episode 17
Pinghai's unit embarrassed Pinghai and didn't give her a year-end bonus. Seaweed wants to help her sister. Calling Beckham, Beckham without background can't solve it at all, so he can only let Haizao persuade Pinghai to continue to work overtime and not contradict the leadership. At this time, Song Siming called, and the well-connected Song Siming called seaweed. Sure enough, many fake sick leave notes were sent out to let Pinghai pass. Seaweed agreed to Song Siming's request ... Soon, through Song Siming's wrist, Pinghai Company gave Pinghai a full year-end bonus, and Pinghai resigned to concentrate on tutoring. Now seaweed works for two days and takes five days off, earning more than 10 thousand a month. Chen Sifu's money in Wuxi was recovered and given to Song Siming as a new year's goods. Mrs. Li's house was cut off from water, electricity and gas. However, the Li family, who lived by lighting candles, fetching water from public toilets and wearing masks every day, still persisted until the end and decided not to stop until she arrived. ...
Episode 18
Haizao's parents came to Jiangzhou, and Pinghai and Haizao went to pick up the plane together. Su Chun and Beckham, who think the other half is having an affair, insinuate that they should be concerned about the other half's movements. Lao Li decided to fight to the end. As a result, Mrs. Li broke her bone for the old sheet with the slogan written on it. Chen Sifu invited them to her home for the New Year, but Mrs. Li declined. As a result, they had to eat New Year's Eve in the dark. A task force was set up to investigate Song Siming, but Song Siming didn't know it. During the Chinese New Year, he also took seaweed to the class reunion. Beckham calls seaweed, but he doesn't want Song Siming to answer the phone. Song Siming said, "She is taking a bath. I'll give her the phone for you." What seaweed said is totally inconsistent with what Song Siming said. Beckham's heart was broken in a fireworks explosion. ...
Episode 25
After Su Chun caught it, Pinghai lost his mind and hesitated whether to explain the situation to the police. Mark naturally knew about Pinghai. After Mark's persuasion, Pinghai is still hard to decide. When she arrived at the police station, Pinghai was still in a dilemma. Finally, she even wasted the opportunity to win Su Chun's commutation and voluntary confession. In pain, Pinghai finally confided to seaweed that she would spend her life with him. Mark told Song Siming about Pinghai, and Song Siming immediately contacted Shen Xingguo, the best lawyer, and solved the matter through personal power and relationship, trying to get the company to drop the lawsuit and trying to give Su Chun a chance to be acquitted. ...
Episode 26
Anxiously waiting, Su Chun finally received a notice from the court to cancel the criminal proceedings. Su Chun, who was kept in the dark, was not only fired from his former unit as his wife and he expected, but also got a reward. It turned out that Song Siming set up two enterprises and solved the original contradiction. Happy Pinghai called to tell seaweed about this happy event. Seaweed suggested that Beckham invite Su Chun to have dinner with Peace Sea. When Beckham asked Haizao's mobile phone to send a message to Su Chun, he found a short message from Song Siming. Beckham was furious and shamelessly cursed seaweed, and finally ended this relationship. Seaweed, who has no support, unconsciously went to work in Song Siming. When Song Siming revealed that she had saved Su Chun, seaweed was very grateful and resumed contact with Song Siming. Finally, seaweed became a professional mistress. ...
Episode 27
The Lao Li family couldn't stand the bad living conditions and complained many times, but they decided to carry it through. Su Chun was promoted to section chief. Those leaders and colleagues who don't pay attention to him at all regard him as a treasure. It is also rumored that he is the wife and brother of Mayor Zhang, scrambling to invite him to dinner and drink. Mrs. Song was shopping with her classmates when she saw an Italian imported dining table. However, in the end, she suppressed her desire to buy. She didn't expect this table to appear in the "small mansion" in Song Siming. While drinking coffee, Mrs. Song expressed her grievances and unwillingness as a woman to her old classmates. ...
Episode 28
Song Siming instructed Citibank to inject capital into Chen Sifu's company so that it could be listed in Hong Kong, and cited an American example to illustrate the importance of matchmaking. Song Siming suggested that seaweed invite Pinghai and Su Chun to have dinner together. During the dinner, Su Chun revealed the idea of resigning. Although Pinghai didn't want her husband to lose this good job, she finally agreed with Su Chun. Seaweed feels boundless loneliness in the "small mansion". In order to catch Song Siming's stomach and his heart, seaweed carefully picked up the menu and began to cook, but the dishes made were hard to swallow. When Song Siming came, he couldn't swallow the food at all. The suggestion of "going out to eat", which was originally rejected by seaweed, was adopted because seaweed forgot to cook.
Episode 29
Song Siming and seaweed went out for dinner. In view of a table just cooked by seaweed, Song cited an example of a French mathematician to explain that "never do something you are not good at". Seaweed is lonely in an empty house, thinking about what love is. Just as she was thinking that "love is either going into marriage or going to death", Song Siming, who had been waiting for her for a long time, finally appeared again. The news that Song Siming wanted Chen Sifu to go public through operation also made the mayor know. Song Siming and seaweed live a happy two-person world. They eat noodles in a noodle restaurant that Beckham once recommended. When Song Siming bought noodles and sent them to his wife, it was her indifference; When seaweed handed the noodles to her sister to taste, it was Pinghai's cynicism that made seaweed throw herself at Song Siming again. Song Siming's family is on holiday at the weekend. When the phone call from seaweed came, the calm and warm family of three once again showed a tense situation. ...
Episode 30
Mrs. Song's father is dying. Song Siming, as the pillar of the family, is constantly dealing with this matter. Finally, Mrs Song's father put Mrs Song's hand in Song Siming's and died. Mrs. Song believed that there was providence, and her father hoped that he could save her marriage with Song Siming, which was about to break up. Under the persuasion of Mrs. Song's classmates, Mrs. Song decided not to divorce again. Chen Sifu listened to his suggestion of "borrowing an arrow from a straw boat" or "hiding a place" and began to destroy the Lao family. As a result, Mrs. Li was buried in the ruins and died. Song Siming, who had an eyebrow lawsuit, was at a loss after learning that seaweed was pregnant. ...
Episode 365438 +0
Song Siming was very angry when he learned about Chen Sifu's situation. He asked Chen Sifu to cut some meat for his hometown and was inspired to give his house to seaweed. After receiving the confidential information of the investigation team, the secretary felt that the evidence was insufficient and would continue to go deeper. When the secretary was drinking tea and playing chess with an old friend, he talked about that people nowadays have not put their minds right and are addicted to material life. Seaweed told Pinghai about her pregnancy. Pinghai insisted that seaweed abort the child, and warned seaweed not to be confused and not to be an unmarried mother, which delayed her life. However, seaweed still insists on this child and makes this child a link between her and Song Siming. ...
Episode 32
Song Siming has been frowning these days. Chen Sifu's men went down to cover for Chen Sifu. Lao Li finally got the big house he dreamed of because of Mrs. Li's death. I also got 20 thousand hush money from Chen Sifu. Pinghai and others also moved into their newly renovated big house. Just as they were cleaning up the house, the neighbors told them that the developer underestimated the area, and also told them that Lao Li refused to sign the joint letter of the owner complaining that the developer underestimated the area. Song Siming's depression finally broke out at home these days. After quarreling with his wife, Song Siming said that the organization was investigating his affairs, and he was very sad to get this pass this time. ...
Episode 33
Haizao's mother went to Pinghai's home. When she learned that Haizao was pregnant with someone else's child, she flew into a rage. I hit Pinghai while shooting seaweed. In the evening, seaweed's mother analyzed the reason why Song Siming loves seaweed and blamed herself for not educating her children well. In a small apartment in Song Siming, seaweed's mother tolerated seaweed. When Mrs. Song sent her children to school, she was asked to talk. Mrs. Song hesitated whether to explain.
Episode 34
The present situation is very unfavorable to Song Siming. The mayor asked Song Siming to sound out the minister's opinion. Therefore, the Secretary said that officials should represent the interests of the people. If you don't do this, no matter how you state it, it is completely wrong. Finally, Song Siming answered the mayor with "wrong judgment, zero point", which also represented the demise of Song Siming circle. Seaweed doesn't know the situation in Song Siming, and keeps calling Song Siming, but Song Siming always avoids it for various reasons. Seaweed thought that Song Siming had given up the chaos and began to doubt whether he had made the right choice and whether he should give birth to the child. When seaweed was running in the street with a big belly, when she saw her ex-boyfriend Beckham and another girl talking happily about their future children in the crowded crowd, an irresistible sadness and pain filled seaweed's heart. ...
Episode 35
Chen Sifu sneaked into Lao Li's house and tried to steal the kettle and helmet written by the contractor that Lao Li took away, but he was caught by the waiting police. In the evening, I told Mrs. Song about the "funeral" and hoped that Mrs. Song could take care of the pregnant seaweed. Mrs. Song was very cold when she heard this. Early in the morning, when Mrs. Song found that Song Siming's money was half missing, she immediately wanted to find seaweed. Under the coercion and inducement of Mrs. Song, she told the address where seaweed lived. After finding seaweed, Mrs. Song said a lot of unpleasant things, hoping that seaweed could spit out the money. Just when seaweed was noncommittal, Mrs. Song, who had been pretending to be very calm, finally tore off her disguise and pinched seaweed's neck to make her pay back the money. In the process of pushing and shoving, seaweed hit the sofa and fell to the ground in pain.
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