Tell a joke.

A has 5 suites, does not go to work, and lives by collecting rent;

B has a suite 1, working to earn wages;

C no room, renting a house, selling vegetables in the market.

Suddenly one day, the property tax will be collected. C said, "Great, I don't have a house. I will fully support taxing those real estate speculators. I can buy a house when the house price drops sharply. " ;

B said, "Never mind, I only have one set. I support taxing those real estate speculators. House prices have plummeted, and I can buy another set. " ;

A said, "Oh, how much is the property tax? 1%, right? The rent will go up by 5% next month. "

C is depressed because the rent has gone up. He wanted to change a house, but found that everyone's rent had gone up, so he had to put up with it. But we can't lose money. The price of vegetables will rise by 5% tomorrow. All right, let's get started.

B and A went shopping and found that the price of vegetables had gone up. They are very depressed. They want to change the market and find that the price of vegetables has gone up, so they have to eat less.

The result is a decline in living standards and an increase in cpi. . . .

2. Since its establishment, NDRC has only done two things: 1) price increase, and 2) defending the price increase.

3. At present, the effective anti-corruption measures in China are: 1) the husband and wife turn against each other; 2) theft at home; 3) accidents; 4) lover report; 5) netizens curse.

4. The reason why foreign milk powder sells well in China: 1) contains no melamine; 2) If there is a huge claim; 3) If the claim fails, you won't go to jail.

5. Shanghai said to Beijing, "It is our old tradition to burn buildings after the grand event …" Beijing nodded, and then looked at Guangzhou silently with Shanghai …

6. I caught a cold and was afraid of going to the hospital to spend too much money, so I said to my wife, "Have some ginger soup." The wife said, "Jiang Taigui, let's go to the hospital ..."

7. When asked what "shanzhai" is, the English teacher was stunned. After a while, he said slowly: madeinChina…

8. Grandma said that if the price of vegetables continues to rise like this, the house will be the same price as cabbage!

9. Not telling the truth is a personal shame, and not telling the truth is a shame of the times!

10. China people died, either from gutter oil, lime powder, stone milk powder, poisonous vaccines, dangerous houses, demolition, diaries, debauchery, or from BMW wheels ... Population of China: a glass of milk a day, shocking a nation! Death is not terrible, what is terrible is that you don't even know how you died!

1 1. China is not necessarily the country with the most land disputes with its neighbors, but it is definitely the country with the most land disputes with its own citizens.

12. I saw the slogan "Pray for the disaster area and God bless China" hanging on the balcony of a dormitory. I think this slogan can be hung for four years.

13. If no one died in the New Zealand earthquake, there would be no commendation meeting, no heroic deeds, no movies, no donations, no flags flying at half mast, no online games all over the country, no celebrities cheating on donations, and no miracle of life! Most importantly, New Zealand has missed the great situation of how difficult it is for the country to be rich and strong!

14. When talking about the so-called rise of great powers, please ask yourself: Has your income increased, has your housing area increased, has the number of countries with visa-free passports increased, has your food safety increased, and has your medical insurance and social security increased? If not, then the rise of great powers is your concern.

15. The National Development and Reform Commission raised the price of gasoline and diesel oil per ton in 320 yuan from 0: 00 on April 14. After receiving the news, people all over the country said that the price increase of oil products does not include waste oil, so it has little impact on real life.

Chow Yun Fat, 16.55 years old, announced that he would donate 99% of his property after his death and didn't want to take anything with him. Writer Gu Xiaojun commented: Never donate money to the mainland, and don't hurt innocent officials.

17. Recently, I came across the purchase list of an official laboratory and saw a batch of Panasonic 42-inch LED screen TVs with 70,000 yuan written on them. What's even funnier is that a computer research laboratory actually bought the top Sony SLR camera and Toyota's off-road vehicle. It seems that this kind of laboratory really makes it a happy place.

18. A song by Makoto Okamoto of Japan 1997 shamelessly copied the anthem of Expo 20 10. That's disgusting! !

What is a miracle? I built a building with tofu dregs, and then hired 150 short-term workers to decorate it. Many people say that this house collapses easily, but I turn a deaf ear. As a result, it collapsed and buried them in ruins for eight days and eight nights. When I asked someone to dig out the collapsed place, 100 people were still alive. It was a miracle. Even more amazing is that I am not only innocent, but also a hero who saves lives!

In the past, it was often reported that dozens of people died in fires in slums such as India/Brazil. Now it is found that our slums only sold 4 1 square meter.