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How to improve interpersonal skills

How to improve interpersonal skills? Interpersonal skills are closely related to social experience. If we can improve our interpersonal skills, people's daily social life will also be improved. The following is what I have collected for you to improve your interpersonal skills. I hope I can help you!

How to improve interpersonal skills: ability to distinguish the environment

To effectively achieve social goals, we must act accordingly. The social environment is changing rapidly, and the objects we communicate with have different characteristics. To adapt to different social environments and people, we must have elite observation and cognitive ability. The ability to distinguish the environment is an important part of social skills.

If a person can distinguish the subtle differences between situations, he is often better able to grasp the changes in social environment and make appropriate behaviors to adapt to different and ever-changing environments. This statement of "adapting to the times" is not only advocated by modern western psychology.

In fact, it is often mentioned in China ancient books. For example, "The Doctrine of the Mean" says: "The state-owned road, * * * words are enough to rejuvenate the country; There is no way in the country, and its silence is enough. " This shows that remonstrance and silence are both appropriate ways to do things, but which method courtiers adopt can produce better results, but it depends on whether the country they are in is a country with Tao or no Tao.

Take Yang Xiu mentioned at the beginning of this chapter as an example. He is a witty wit, but his master Cao Cao is a suspicious person. Yang Xiu was clever enough to tell Cao Cao's mind many times, so he was killed. If his master is a magnanimous and resourceful man, Yang Xiu will not be killed, but will be entrusted with an important task. Although some people will lament that Yang Xiu was born at an untimely time, it seems that Yang Xiu only cares about the quick speech at the moment, but ignores the thought and character of Cao Cao, thus saying something that is in line with the facts but not in the other party's mind, thus ruining his life in vain. It can be seen that in order to successfully achieve social goals, it is necessary to judge the changes in the objective situation and adapt to various social situations.

how to improve interpersonal skills: insight into other people's psychological state

insight into other people's psychological state is also an important part of social skills. When some people see other people's behavior, they don't try to understand their situation and feelings when they do things, so they immediately judge what kind of person they are from other people's behavior. This orientation of emphasizing judgment over understanding is a big obstacle to the development of social ability.

To sum up, to improve one's social skills, on the one hand, one should improve one's insight into one's own and others' needs, thoughts and feelings; on the other hand, one should carefully observe different situations and people, distinguish the differences and understand and analyze them, so as to strengthen one's grasp of the ever-changing social environment. Although psychologists believe that social skills can be improved through training, it is not easy to really improve social skills, nor can it be achieved overnight. Success depends on one's motivation, determination, hard work and perseverance. From the three aspects of social communication, break through one by one. 1. Cultivate good expression skills. A popular and attractive person in social communication must be someone who has mastered social eloquence skills. The basic skills of social eloquence are shown in three aspects: timeliness, moderation and moderation.

first, be timely. It is timely to say that when it is time to say it, it should stop at the right place. But some people don't say what they should say in social circles, and they don't greet them in time when they meet; Don't say goodbye in time when breaking up; Don't apologize in time when you are rude; Failing to answer questions in time; Don't answer for help in time ... On the contrary, some people should stop. They nagged about their misfortunes in a lively and festive atmosphere; Laugh and joke when others are sad; When the master is in an uneasy mood, he still gushes about publishing the macro theory; Talking in detail about "road news" in the elder's home. Please imagine, if you meet such a person in social life, what kind of impression would you have on him? Second, we need the right amount.

the right amount of social eloquence also includes the right amount of voice. Speak louder in public, and talk at a moderate level in private visits. If you are talking between close friends and lovers, whispering can show a special relationship of intimacy and affection, giving people a sense of intimacy. These are all skills that should be mastered when talking with people in social situations. Third, social eloquence should be moderate. Mainly refers to grasping the depth of speech according to different objects, grasping the appropriateness of speech according to different occasions, and grasping the discretion of speech according to one's own identity.

Secondly, the body language should be just right. Where does the eloquence come from? Is it natural? Some people pay attention to training since childhood, so their expression ability will be stronger than others. However, most people's eloquence is consciously practiced after adulthood. Demosthenes, an outstanding orator in ancient Greece, stuttered when he was young. In order to correct stuttering and pronounce clearly, he put pebbles in his mouth to recite and speak against the strong wind. He also often recited poems, myths and tragicomedy. After hard practice, he finally became a world-famous orator.

Take an active part in speeches, dialogues and debates. Cherish the exercise opportunity of expressing opinions in public. With more on-the-spot experience, your eloquence will naturally improve. In addition, in the discussion or group discussion activities, you should speak enthusiastically and don't give up the opportunity to exercise. As long as you persevere and train hard, your oral expression ability will be enhanced. Strong oral expression ability, stepping into the society is also a kind of competitiveness. Of course, you should also be soberly aware that your oral expression ability is strong, and you should be backed by extensive knowledge and learn more about all kinds of knowledge.

how to improve interpersonal communication ability: the cultivation of interpersonal integration ability

To integrate into society, we need to adjust our own ideas, face the world bravely and accept the world. Of course, accepting the world does not mean that you wait passively and give in to difficulties, nor does it mean that you agree with negative and backward things without any principles, or even go along with them. Instead, you should accept the reality with a positive attitude, and have the courage and determination to eliminate the negative phenomena in life, carry forward the main theme, and do your duty as a contemporary college student. Of course, interpersonal integration ability is not simply reflected in whether you can accept and identify with the world, it is also a reflection of a person's comprehensive quality. The strength of interpersonal integration ability is closely related to a person's ideological and moral character, knowledge and skills, activity ability, creativity ability, interpersonal skills and health status. Generally speaking, a college graduate with high quality, strong ability in all aspects and healthy body and mind can adapt to the environment and work quickly after entering the society. Even under difficult conditions and poor environment, he can turn unfavorable factors into favorable factors and achieve good results through his own efforts.

interpersonal integration is a kind of ability, wisdom and art. RMI Company in Ohio, USA, once had a decline in production, low work efficiency, employees facing unemployment and emotional instability. Big Jim Daniel, who was appointed as the general manager by the head office, is facing a severe test of integrating with everyone and leading them to change their face. He posted such slogans everywhere in the company: "If you see a person without a smile, please share your smile with him" and "Nothing can succeed unless you do it with enthusiasm". Big Jim also changed the factory emblem into a smiling face and stuck it on the factory gate, office supplies and employees' helmets. Intimacy produces a sense of trust and belonging, and the company's production efficiency has increased by 8% without increasing investment. It is not unfathomable to look at it and integrate with people. A sincere word, a relaxed heart talk, a knowing smile or eyes can all be exchanged for a healthy, optimistic and peaceful state of mind, creating a relaxed and harmonious interpersonal space. The key is whether you have the awareness of continuous learning and continuous improvement of this ability.

how to improve interpersonal skills: problem-solving ability training

it is our most important responsibility to deal with various problems in daily study and life. However, when problems come one after another and the complexity is rising, it is time to test our problem-solving ability by systematically finding out the causes of the problems, prescribing the right medicine and solving the problems in the most efficient way.

With regard to the cultivation of problem-solving ability, we might as well learn from IBM's method of cultivating employees. There are five major steps for IBM to cultivate this ability: First, we should define and clarify the problem; first, we should collect data and analyze it to make sure that the problem really exists, then write it down and make it a statement that everyone can understand, so as to make the problem concrete and make the relevant personnel clear.

Second, we should analyze the problem: we can use the skills of management, such as fishbone diagram. Or hold a discussion meeting with subordinates, classify the causes of the problems and list the priorities for solving them. Third, we should work out possible solutions: invite colleagues to brainstorm, and the most important thing is to sort out these results in a systematic way, and rank them according to the principles of whether they can really solve the problem, whether they can get management support, and whether they can be put into practice.

fourth, we should choose the solution and make an action plan: choose the one with the greatest influence and the easiest to push, and make an action plan immediately. Fifth, we should promote the solution and track the results: define' success' before proceeding, constantly review the implementation of the decision in the process, and set milestones in each stage to ensure that the action achieves the goal.