Where can I contact an inspirational lecturer to teach the first lesson of my senior year of high school?

I don’t know how to write. To be precise, I don’t know what words to use to completely string together the feelings of this year, so that they can hang there like gorgeous crystals without losing their original flavor. Share it so you can understand.

When I was writing the first character in this extremely hot August, I suddenly noticed many unknown flowers blooming in patches outside the window, red, yellow, pink and white, and clear. Blue, colorful and green, full of beautiful colors. Oh my gosh, when did these flowers bloom? Such a raging momentum should not only last a few days.

I don’t know if these flowers are blooming so beautifully this year. If so, I think I should thank them. I could smell a lot of sweet smells in the air, and a very beautiful word suddenly appeared: The flowers bloom undefeated!

The flowers bloom undefeated.

The flowers bloom undefeated! I think I can finally calm down and tell you many stories that happened this year. I think no matter what happens in the future, every bit of this year, Bit by bit, I will never forget it again.

A week before the start of my senior year of high school, a parent-teacher meeting was held.

It was a very serious parent-teacher meeting, one in which no one was absent or even late. The head teacher mobilized almost all the emotions of the parents at that meeting. The importance of the senior year in high school goes without saying. As the saying goes, "Success is also a senior year, failure is also a senior year." No matter how brilliant the children were in the past, no matter how failed they were. The head teacher, a thin little girl, actually leaned on the edge of the podium and lectured for two hours with high morale. She just made us believe that anything is possible, whether miracles or bad consequences, will be dramatic this year. Appeared in style.

In order to let each student clearly understand his or her ranking position in class, grade, and even in the district and the city, the school carefully prepared a ranking list of grades for each subject in the first and second grades of high school. Now that I think about it, I have to admire the detail of that table. The total score, standard score, and ranking of each subject are compared with the average score in the grade. There is even a carefully designed score curve chart derived from this. Finally, a detailed analysis of the comprehensive ranking is included. It is a piece of paper that is so densely packed that it is really painstaking.

My father came back from school with a gloomy face. The situation was as grim as I expected: he was ranked 290th in his grade. Terrible location.

"There is still hope. As the teacher said, everything is possible." My father said that he believed in me, but I didn't know if I should believe in myself again. However, there is no way out. We are children who have crossed the river and cannot look back.

Only by galvanizing my horse and catching up can I be worthy of my parents, my teachers, and most importantly, myself.

After eleven long years of preparation, it is finally time to start the battle and fight desperately. I had to say goodbye to my undisciplined, irresponsible past.

I hastily accepted the challenge even though I was completely defeated. However, the battle had already begun and I couldn’t even hide.

The senior year of high school is really different.

For senior high school students, writing articles is definitely a luxury and wasteful thing. I had to admire the strong motivation of the senior year of high school. There were more and more draft reminders on my desk. I packed up my pen and manuscript paper and said goodbye to them resolutely. The silver-white pen engraved with a beautiful dragon pattern was too heavy and I couldn't handle it when I picked it up, so I decided to give up.

At the beginning of the third year of high school, almost everyone was ambitious and eager to try, and everyone was so courageous that they had to go to Fudan Jiaotong University. I posted a large slogan "Enter Fudan" on my bedside and shouted it several times every day when I got up early and before going to bed to increase my meager confidence. Under the pressure of the college entrance examination, all dreams were abstracted into the sacred university that I identified. As soon as I heard all the news about Fudan, I immediately became excited and excited, as if everything was eclipsed by the dazzling halo of that school.

I never thought about the huge gap between the score of 290th and Fudan, and the students around me didn't seem to realize the terrifying formation of thousands of troops crossing the single-plank bridge.

We cling to the dreams in our hearts, shouting "I want ××" like Xianglin's sister-in-law. That kind of mentality and the explosive atmosphere created by it are something that people who have not experienced the senior year of high school cannot understand.

The first real competition from the senior year of high school came soon.

Midterm test for the first semester. A test we thought we were well prepared for but got killed horribly.

Our ranking has undergone earth-shaking changes as the teacher predicted before. Many previously unknown students in the class were like dark horses, which suddenly surprised everyone. As they were ups and downs, many people began to become practical. The school of Peking University is indeed artistic, but not everyone can feel the elegance there. The embarrassment of having too many monks makes every senior high school student feel embarrassed in front of the huge gap between reality and dreams.

I am one of the few people who still clings to the illusion. Please note that I use the word "fantasy", that is, something that seemed absolutely impossible at the time. It stands to reason that someone like me, who was unsatisfactorily hovering between the 200th and 300th place in my freshman and sophomore years of high school, and who is still maintaining a slight momentum in my senior year of high school, has no hope for a top university like Fudan in the country. The school should no longer have any illusions. But God knows how I had such a spirit of revolutionary optimism at that time. I stubbornly held on to the idea of ????"Every time I take a test, I will advance by 50", thinking foolishly, and feeling foolishly proud.

Later facts also proved that it was precisely because of my frightening optimism that I had the motivation to persevere, and that the absolutely impossible things gradually showed the dawn of hope step by step.

The following days began to become more and more dull, simple and repetitive.

Every morning, I rushed into the crowded classroom out of breath, put my school bag, picked up exercises, and started to calculate. Thinking about it now, those days that are similar but not the same have become abstracted into densely written draft paper, formulas and exercises on the blackboard that are never wiped clean, and the teacher's heartfelt instructions and words that are always floating in the air. Chalk crumbs inside.

The humor cells of the classmates were trained to be extremely sharp in this simple environment. Once any trivial matter is caught, it will be immediately exaggerated and expanded, and then attract everyone sensation. An article written by a certain writer about "dog farts/dog farts/dog farts" unexpectedly caused the whole class to slap the table, laugh, and take down the table legs and beat them crazily. The teacher said that this is a manifestation of senior high school syndrome, because our lives are too single, so anything that can cause ripples will bring us immeasurable happiness.

The short time after two classes every Friday afternoon is designated as "game day" by us. We rack our brains and bring things to school to play with. There is a children's game of "flicking coins" that is particularly popular with us. Put a few dime and one-yuan coins on the table, and use a few pieces of rubber to build them as goals. Boys and girls all lie on the table, shouting and laughing, and have a great time playing in a serious way. I myself don’t understand how we, who have already had our coming-of-age ceremony, are so easily satisfied, and how we can be so hysterical when we laugh.

"When you play, play hard, and when you study, study hard." This is an unbreakable truth that our high school students believe in.

The numbers on the college entrance examination countdown card are getting smaller and smaller, and we have no time. The teacher shouted to us: "Just do whatever you have to do."

Then one day, someone planted a bunch of fresh lilies in the classroom, pink and white perfume lilies. Throughout the fall, the quiet scent of lilies lingered in the classroom. We inadvertently calculated in the faint sweet fragrance day after day. No one paid special attention to the bundle of tranquil lilies, but it and its taste were truly and deeply engraved in everyone's heart.

I don’t know what words to use to accurately express my feelings at that stage, maybe it’s “steady”. I still shout "Enter Fudan" when I get up early and go to bed late every day, but I no longer say "Fudan" over and over again. Everyone carefully keeps their dreams deep in their hearts and uses their own methods to try their best. We cannot grasp the ethereal things such as progress and honor. Only these real days can be seen and held by us.

I can see my classmates and myself working really hard in these simple days. My grades are rising steadily in this sense of solidity, and I am moving forward neither too fast nor too slowly. This feeling, thinking about it now, is really good.

The days in the second semester of senior high school have changed greatly compared with the calmness of the first semester, adding a lot of restlessness and uneasiness.

The first round of sorting out knowledge and the second round of systematically mastering comprehensive questions have come to an end, and the third round of intense exams and bombing of question sea tactics followed one after another.

It was an indescribable time.

The class schedule has been changed to the terrible format of "Chinese, Chinese, Mathematics, Extrapolation + 1 + 1 self-study". Teachers usually no longer help us summarize anything in class, but just hand out stacks of mock papers for various subjects to be tested in class. I don’t know why the teacher has so many test papers. We have to do each type of paper in each area, analyze it once, and check it randomly again. There are also various unified examination papers from other cities and the country, and even the weird test questions from unknown academic newspapers and periodicals were all collected by the teacher for us to do.

A small test in one class, a big test in two classes, and a unified self-study class mock test for the whole grade. All test papers must be scored. Small tests that the teacher has no time to approve will be given to students. Alternate batches with each other. Scores have become the most exciting and least valuable thing in this hot and cold season that alternates between winter and spring.

That was a powerful stimulus.

Memorize n words every day, do n test papers every day, and complete n revisions every day.

The schedule is densely painted, and every time something is completed, it is crossed out with a colored pen. The shocking bars and the bright red arrows on the examination paper sprinkled every evening and morning, paving the only path where beautiful flowers can be seen in school and home.

The yellowed pages as high as mountains moved slowly in the musty air. Sometimes I recite books at home until I shed tears, and I want to throw the book out the window. However, as long as you recite "Fudan" silently a few times, you will calm down immediately. With a heavy head and a blank heart, I was willing to bury myself in that room that was about to go rancid, repeating "Zhihuzheye, a b c d" over and over again. I was persistent and persistent. I didn't understand how a person like me who was used to being undisciplined could suddenly change his mind. Sitting so upright was so touching.

That was the most unforgettable period of my senior year in high school.

To this day, I am sitting in an air-conditioned room comfortably sorting out the books from my senior year of high school, and I still admire my perseverance and courage at that time. There are several large books of notes densely written with comments, examination papers half a meter high, each of which has been carefully written, revised and analyzed, and a 16-karat classic mathematics exercise book as thick as a dictionary. Each question has Four or five solutions were read no less than 10 times. In that bitterly cold winter and weird spring, I used my cracked hands and rough handwriting to weave the only dream in my heart word by word and question by question. I think this is the impact and change brought to me by my senior year in high school.

Growth is a balance of longing and longing

When it tilts to the point of falling down

Those nights when the moonlight is lost

That’s the time What kind of voice should I use to soothe?

I like Lao Lang’s songs very much. During those days, Lao Lang made me quiet and relieved. I thought that if I wanted to use one person's singing voice to soundtrack my senior year of high school, Lao Lang's would be very suitable. There is a sound of waves hidden under the calm.

I carried the shame of 290 people and made a final struggle with reality with a desperate mood. I looked carefully at the weights in my hands. There was nothing left, only hard work. I think everyone who has struggled in the senior year of high school has experienced the narrow beauty that blocks all retreats, and they all feel the tragic feelings in the final mood with their hearts.

Filling in a volunteer application is a terrible thing. It is far more complicated and unbearable than I thought.

I thought I would coolly fill in the words "Fudan University" in my first choice, and then proudly continue my dream. I even imagined what words I would use to fill in and what words I would use to refute if my parents objected or the teacher disapproved. However, those were all my thoughts before filling in my application form. "Think" means "think", and "reality" means "reality".

In fact, the process of filling out the application form has indeed become the most frustrating event in my senior year of high school.

The teacher repeatedly emphasized that one must measure one’s position based on the scores and rankings of previous major exams as well as all performances in the first and second years of high school. My confidence disappeared in the process of sorting and comparing again and again. All. Can I? Can I? In front of the banner "Enter Fudan", my answers became less confident each time, and my thin voice was shattered by the cruel reality.

The originally encouraging attitude of the teachers took a 180-degree turn at this time. They talk to you, use the admission rate, and use the horrific failure examples of the previous years to try to scare you and make you experience the horror of "one mistake can lead to eternal hatred".

"Conservative, conservative, more conservative." has become the first principle for filling out the application form.

My situation is somewhat desperate. The pitiful background of the whole family was not enough to arouse the loving care of any capable person, and my own achievements were so weak that I had no ability to cry out. Even though half a year of hard work earned me a slightly higher position among the top 80 in my grade, I felt helpless in the shadow of 290 and the unattainable threshold of Fudan University.

Allies began to withdraw one after another.

Some of them are because of the five-point commitment from a lower school, some are because their fathers know the soul figures of a certain university, and some are confused by the teachers' nudges. In short, , they gave up.

I suddenly became isolated and helpless. My father even went to Huazheng behind my back to get a 10-point bonus form, and told me endlessly all day long about the unlimited future of studying law. Finally, even the principal said: "You only have a 30% chance of getting into Fudan University. You have to think carefully."

In those days, my nerves became unprecedentedly fragile. Erratic and hesitant in the retreat from relative safety. A senior student from Huazheng actually comforted me with these words: "Please enter our school first. If you really get a very high score, you might as well sit in front of Fudan University and cry!"

So , I choose to give up. I don't dare to let Fudan exist like a beautiful fairy tale only in words. I don't dare to touch that extremely hard stone with my unconfident eggs. I couldn't stand the despair that would come from heaven to hell if I failed. Amidst the cheers of unanimous approval, I tremblingly wrote down the name of the school I had never thought of, letting the word "betrayal" explode in my mind.

After handing in the form, I took a two-hour car ride alone and secretly went to the Fudan campus to sit there for an afternoon to mourn the demise of my dream.

Fudan is so beautiful. The overwhelming azaleas bloom quietly and intoxicatingly on the campus, perfectly reflecting the solemn and sacred Fudan campus in my imagination. My tears suddenly flowed down. I'm not willing to let a dream I've had for 12 years be completely shattered by a piece of paper. I'm not willing to have my desperate efforts in the last year of high school be cut off by the word "insurance". Buried for reasons. I know that nothing can replace the important position of Fudan in my heart. If I really get into any department of other schools with high scores, how can the regret be relieved by sitting in front of Fudan and crying.

I know that that extremely hot Sunday afternoon meant the victory of a persistent belief for me. Now that I think about it, that peaceful and beautiful afternoon in Fudan helped me make an important decision of my own.

I finally asked for my application form back under everyone’s surprised gazes, and solemnly and neatly filled in the four “Fudan University” names on the form that made me excited. Big letters. Those are truly the most comfortable and beautiful four words I have written in the past 12 years. These four words are also the most important decision I have made based on my own will over the years, and they are a decision that reflects the initial weight of my life.

I want what I want, even if I am beaten to a bloody head in the face of reality, even if I lose completely in the college entrance examination, this is the choice I made myself.

There will be nothing worth writing about in the following days. After we handed in the application forms, there was nothing worth worrying about. We could read good books, prepare papers, and relax. It was as simple as that.

As for the three days that countless people call black, I think there is some tension, but for those of us who have experienced many battles, treat it as a special mock test and face it calmly. That's it.

I felt that I was extraordinarily calm at that time. I finished all the exam papers without any panic or shaking. The invigilator showed a rare smile and said, "The exam is over." "Okay." My high school is over. When I walked out of the examination room, my feet were a little weak and my head was buzzing. The whole body collapsed into a ball as if its backbone had been taken away. Tiredness came over me like a mountain. I was tired, really tired. Handing in the exam paper feels like handing over half a lifetime of instructions. More than three hundred days and nights full of sweat and tears!

The overwhelming feeling came over me and drowned me silently.

After getting the notice from Fudan University, I finally couldn’t help but visit that familiar classroom. The last room in the south corridor on the fifth floor is where the youth of the third year of high school flowed away. A bouquet of lavender forget-me-nots was unexpectedly placed in the glass bottle on the podium. Small green petals were scattered among them, swaying gently in the wind.

My friends and I have gone through the most difficult years together in a house with flowers blooming all year round. Now, some of them have gone to Beijing, some have gone to Nanjing, or they have stayed in some distant corner of Shanghai. I think of my classmates burying their heads in the messy scraps of paper to calculate the tension of water. I think of me putting my feet up on the stool in the front seat and memorizing politics. I carefully arranged this small room Every little story full of ups and downs that has been played out so truly is deeply buried in my heart. They are the best witnesses of my unforgettable senior year in high school.

We all gathered here because of a common goal. Now, everyone has to go their separate ways for a new goal. There is no such thing as a banquet that lasts forever. Many boys shed tears at the graduation party, whether it was joy or pain. After all, the reality of this period is the most important life that we, ***, have walked hand in hand.

That laughter reminded me of my flowers

quietly blooming for me in every corner of my life

I once thought I I will always stay by her side

Today we have left in the vast sea of ??people

They are all old, right

Where are they

Luckily I

had accompanied them to bloom

The flowers have bloomed. Whether we admit it or ignore it, as long as the flowers bloom in our hearts, we will be undefeated.

Let’s forget about some stories that haven’t been told yet

Those emotions have become difficult to distinguish between true and false over the years

They are all old now

They are still driving

Let’s just do this

Each of us