Mother: Daughter, don't expect your husband to support the family, as long as he can support himself. Do you agree with your mother?

The formation of a person's concept of marriage comes from various aspects, one of which is the family background, especially the mother's concept of marriage, which can subtly affect a child's life.

Speaking of Lin Pin's husband, everyone familiar with him shook his head. The girl who introduced Lin Pin and her husband turned out to be her husband's colleague. She still felt guilty for Lin Pin and thought that the person who introduced herself had missed her life.

After that, she never wanted to introduce anyone again. She always regrets to say that when she was working with her husband, she felt that he was very nice and should be a trustworthy person, so she introduced him to Lin Pin. I don't know. People are completely different from their predecessors.

Lin Pin's marriage created a new model I saw. To tell the truth, models like them can still get divorced. I haven't seen the second film except Lin Pin. Of course, the main credit is Lin Pin, and her "giving personality" has no bottom line, which is outrageous.

Let's talk about their living conditions first.

Her husband's work unit is good, which sounds enviable, but in fact he is just a contract worker with a monthly salary of more than 3 thousand and no extra income.

Lin pin's monthly income can exceed ten thousand. The nature of her job doesn't sound as good as her husband's. She sells rice next to a school, mainly for Chinese food and dinner. She is very busy alone, and she is usually too busy for a day.

Her husband leaves work at 5: 30 every afternoon. He never helps her. He goes there occasionally and sits there watching in a neat suit. Lin Pin wouldn't let him help, saying he wouldn't, but he would get himself into trouble.

In everyone's opinion, Lin Pin didn't find a husband, but raised an eldest son.

02

Lin Pin is pregnant before marriage. She used to want nothing when she got married. Instead, her family married off the dowry and the renovation cost of the new house. Five months after marriage, she gave birth to a son.

Because parents are close, most of Lin Pin's children are brought up by their mothers, who send them during the day and pick them up at night. As the children grow up, Lin pin supports all the expenses from daily expenses to later school.

Later, Lin Pin expanded the store and hired two employees. Because there are more and more places to spend money at home, my husband still plays games at home on weekends with a salary of more than 3 thousand yuan per month. A dozen is a whole day.

Compared with her husband's leisure, Lin Pin is really busy like a top every day. She was in charge of everything in the shop, and it was still a mess when she got home.

Her husband never does housework. After seven years of marriage, the land has never been delayed once. I remember once, I went to Lin Pin's house to play. When I went downstairs, she turned back and said that she would buy a pack of cigarettes for her husband to take back. I said he was at home anyway, and I didn't know if I would buy it.

Lin Pin said that I always bought it for him, and he was lazy. This reason is really indisputable.

Her husband is still very good in front of outsiders and speaks well, so people who meet her husband for the first time have a particularly good impression, but they don't know the actual situation until they play well with Lin Pin.

He has a bad temper and gets angry easily. Lin Pin, who was most impressed, said that once her husband was angry because she skinned his clothes. Her husband blamed her for washing by hand instead of using the washing machine.

On another occasion, Lin Pinyin was busy in the shop and didn't come back until late at night. Her husband has been sitting on the sofa waiting for her to come back and cook. At half past ten, he was angry when he saw her coming back.

But Lin Pin was silent and didn't quarrel with him. She said it was for the peace of the family.

03

I never knew how Lin Pinrou's maddening personality came from, because when she talked about these things, we, as outsiders, were even more excited than her, and would secretly say, "In this case, why are you looking for a husband?" I'd rather be single all my life. "

It was not until later that Lin Pin mentioned her parents by accident that we knew that her parents got along in almost the same way. Her mother and her personality are similar. A person has supported the family, but her father's temper is getting bigger and bigger.

When she got married, her mother told her, "Daughter, don't expect your husband to support the family, as long as he can support himself." Because her father likes gambling, he lost all his money and his family's money. This is her mother's wish, and she feels that the other half should only be able to support herself and not give her any trouble. She is a good husband.

Lin Pin grew up under her mother's idea. Even though shine on you was better than Lan, she became more tolerant than her mother.

She said that she didn't expect her husband to earn much money either. She just hoped that he wouldn't always lose his temper at home and the family would be happy. However, sometimes, the two will still quarrel.

Last Spring Festival, because her husband said that she was poorly dressed and could not dress up more and more, Lin Pin replied a few words. Her husband is clamoring for a divorce. Lin Pin said he was leaving, dragging his luggage back to his parents' house.

Her husband went the next day and bought her a down jacket with his year-end bonus. Lin Pin forgave him. When she saw us, she asked if the down jacket was nice, saying that it was bought by her husband.

A woman like her is also easy to satisfy.

04

Her mother said, "Daughter, don't expect your husband to support the family, as long as he can support himself." I sometimes miss her mother's words. This view of marriage ruined her life and made it very difficult for her.

It also made her lose the most accurate judgment on what marriage should be like, and she has been unable to get out of the mode of "one willing to fight and one willing to suffer" all the way.

It was also from her that I saw the influence of parents' views on marriage on their children. Later, with this idea, I observed my married peers around me and found that their demands for the other half and the disadvantages of their parents' marriage were hidden in it.

I have a junior high school classmate who told me that the only requirement for her to get married is money, and nothing else matters. Because her mother married a man who couldn't earn money and suffered all her life, she was told the importance of money from an early age.

I found that the most missing things in my parents' marriage, in the process of growing up, were subtly moved to them, some good, some bad, some not obvious, and some inherited and developed like forest products.

Therefore, as a parent, you should understand what kind of responsibilities and burdens you bear and how important it is to educate your children consciously or unconsciously.