He Qiao (Ⅱ)

(2 1)

The day before the operation, many doctors came to Ann's bed to ask about her illness and touched her chin mercilessly. Every time the doctor doesn't gently lift her chin, Ann will think of the scene in the idol drama-Prince Charming provokes Marisu's chin, looks at her eyes like a frightened deer, and then kisses her hard ... However, the fact is that only the doctors spit on her, and what's more frightening is all kinds of speculations about her illness.

Ann fidgeted before going to bed. The bed was in the corridor, and countless people passed by until the nurse sister came over and put a few small particles inside and outside Ann's ears, which was said to help her sleep. Ann believed her words and began to sleep.

This feeling is really heavy, and I haven't had a dream, which is very rare for Ann who has just experienced emotional changes.

The operation is scheduled for Monday. Ann thinks Monday is a beautiful day and everything is a new beginning. After dumping this "unclean, no disease after eating" tumor, the chin may be a little sharper.

At dawn, everyone rustled back and forth in the corridor. Doctors, nurses, patients and their families ... it's only six o'clock. Ann wants to sleep for a while, but when all the noise comes, Ann wakes up instead. Yes, I have an operation today, and my mother is with me. I wonder when the doctor will pick her up for a while. These things were enough for her to think about, so she completely forgot. She just said goodbye to Joe last night. But perhaps, in her heart of hearts, she always stubbornly believes that she has a unique attraction to Joe besides beauty, wisdom and talent, so she always doesn't want to believe that Joe is really leaving.

When Ann went to the bathroom to wash her face, she felt that the water was still a little cold. Yes, summer hasn't come yet.

I'm going to the operating room soon. I can't eat in the morning. Ann is very hungry. In my heart, it is empty.

From seven o'clock to nine o'clock, every time someone came to pick someone up in the operating room, her heart mentioned it, but after many turns, the name was still not called. Just when Ann relaxed a little, the familiar voice called her name, and she hurried over, followed by her mother.

As soon as I got on the elevator, Ann suddenly began to be afraid.

(22)

At the moment she entered the operating room, Ann didn't look back at her mother. Perhaps, when you are most concerned, you can find that the other person is not paying attention, which can reduce some worries.

The operating room is really a big place. All the compartments look busy, but there are not many people in the corridor. This is a place where a neat freak like Ann will feel comfortable. Very clean. But it's Ann's first time to go in, and she still feels a little scary. There are so many small rooms on both sides of the endless corridor, which seems to be a deduction of life and death.

Ann was taken into a small operating room, where three or four medical staff were waiting, but the surgeon in charge of the operation had not come yet. They put it on the operating table, put an infusion bag or bottle in it, put an oxygen tube in it, and gave her an electrocardiogram. The "beep" sound often heard on TV began to ring. At this time, Ann was really nervous.

Everything in the operating room is a little cold, and the dark green jacket worn by the medical staff looks gloomy. A doctor said, relax and relax. Then, then there was no then, so I fell asleep.

This sleep, Ann didn't dream. Ann has thought about it many times. When the anesthetic works, she wants to have a dream, dreaming about Joe, dreaming about Joe's hair, Joe's ears, Joe's hands and Joe's Adam's apple ... but without a dream, even after the anesthesia works together, she doesn't seem to exist in this world. Maybe someone still cares, maybe someone remembers, but she just can't feel the breath of her existence in these hours.

When I was briefly awake, I heard the nurse calling her, "We have finished the operation. Now we go to the ward, and I heard a response."

Ann nodded weakly, opened her mouth to speak, but didn't speak. Then I fell asleep again.

(23)

When I woke up again, it was already one o'clock in the afternoon. When I opened my eyes, my mother stood by the bed and moistened her lips with a cotton swab dipped in warm water, so that she didn't feel thirsty after sleeping for so long. However, Ann opened her mouth and told her mother that she wanted to drink water. It is estimated that the plot of TV series exists subconsciously.

At this moment, a nurse came over and my mother asked in broken Mandarin, "Can I drink water now?" The nurse realized that Ann was awake, came over and asked about her condition, and then told her that she couldn't drink water until two o'clock.

After these conversations, Ann really woke up, felt the pain coming from her chin, and remembered that her colleagues came to see her shortly after returning to the ward after the operation. At that time, she couldn't open her eyes at all, but simply said a few words. A colleague reminded her to sleep when she was sleepy, and she fell asleep. I wonder when they left.

Ann suddenly had a strong sense of urine, so she had to ask the nursing aunt to pick up the urinal. Because she never urinated lying down, Ann tried very hard to hold back for a long time before she finished. She felt that the urine flowed all over her ass, and she was embarrassed to squeeze out a smile when the nursing aunt came to wipe it.

At two o'clock, we can finally drink water and eat. My mother went to the canteen to buy porridge. Ann opened her mouth a little and her mother fed it to her bit by bit.

It wasn't until six o'clock in the afternoon that Ann finished blood transfusion and got out of intensive care, so she could go to the bed and toilet by herself. In just half a day, Ann slept enough, dragged her mother for a long time in the stairwell, and let her go down to buy food. She stayed in the stairwell for a while.

It was during this time alone in the stairwell that Ann remembered everything with Joe before. Everything is like a dream and a nightmare. She sent a message to Xiaoya: If I still expect him to visit me in the hospital, will it look silly?

Xiaoya evaded the question and just said, "Take care, I'll see you tomorrow." .

On the first night, the pain in the chin was still obvious. Ann can only lie on her back. She is not used to lying on her back, so she feels very uncomfortable and wakes up after a sleep. Mother insisted on staying and fell asleep in a short nursing bed. In such a safe and warm environment, Ann had a real dream.

(24)

Some people like extra study when they are ill. Ann is the representative of this group. Some people can't let go of their work even if they are sick in bed. Ann is such a person.

After breakfast, Ann began to read and revise the working manuscript. Everyone in the ward looked at her with an inexplicable admiration, as if only Ann's eyes had the function of reading. But Ann won't be paranoid until she knows that she forces herself to be in a busy job.

When Xiaoya came, she brought a lot of fruit, just in time for dinner. Ann asked her mother to wash some fruit first, and then to buy rice. During this time, Ann can talk a lot with Xiaoya.

Ann was embarrassed to mention Joe, but Xiaoya said first, "Today, I asked Mr. Joe if he wanted to see you with me. He just smiled. " Ann realized how much she missed Joe.

Ann asked, "Mr. Xiaoya, is he all right?"

"What's the matter with him? He is heartless as usual, as if he doesn't care about anything. "

Xiaoya said "I don't care about anything", but sensitive Ann couldn't help feeling sad when she heard "I don't care about you at all".

Mom bought a meal and came back. Xiaoya said that she hadn't eaten dinner yet. Ann couldn't leave her in the hospital, so she had to go first.

After seeing Xiaoya leave, Ann turned to eat, and her expression was full of pain. Her mother asked her if the meal was delicious. She answered irrelevant questions: "Nothing, just a sore chin. Open your mouth slowly. "

Ann can't cry in front of her mother, but at the moment, tears flow in her heart. She knew it was over between her and Joe, and there would be no more intersection, no, maybe never.

Ann remembered that she and Joe had met several times. Joe just replied that they were colleagues, and his eyes were evasive. Ann remembers that when Joe said he liked her, there was a hint of disdain on her face. She also remembered Joe's affection when he was talking on the phone with others at the entrance of the building that night at the training base. Finally, it suddenly occurred to her that Xiaoya and Joe, who had been gossiping until 17, already had girlfriends, but everything was "broken" after Ann and Joe were together. ...

(25)

On the third day after the operation, Ann's chin didn't hurt so much, and she ran out of antibiotics after the operation. The doctor said it would be good to go back to the hospital regularly to change the medicine, so Ann was "driven" out of the hospital. After finishing the discharge formalities in the morning, I walked around with my mother in the afternoon and hurriedly sent my mother away to prepare for work the next day.

Companies are no different in peacetime. I used to think I was more important, but without one person, the company was as smooth as ever. Yes, I made all the arrangements before I left, so Ann comforted herself. The condition of the wound is still unstable, so Ann simply doesn't attend the morning meeting and seldom talks. Miss Gao kindly told her to send a message if she needed communication, so as not to affect the wound healing.

The intense work gave Ann temporary peace. BOSS is receiving important clients and asking Ann to take notes with a notebook. He points to Ann and tells the children that you see this teacher, who came to work on the third day after the operation, but he can do all the work beautifully without saying anything.

Although it has been praised for several months, this praise is a bit special. Ann's chin was stiff and she couldn't laugh, but her heart was flattered.

Dad called and was concerned about Ann's illness. Amdo was stopped after saying two words: Don't talk hard, or the wound will be in trouble if it doesn't heal well. Dad's tone is very strict, which makes Ann unhappy.

When people can't talk, the surrounding environment will become much quieter. Ann likes this silence.

At noon, Ann called a colleague and went to the new porridge shop diagonally opposite the company. A porridge for two, a vegetarian dish, and two budget-conscious little girls are enjoying an elegant moment. Ann can only open her mouth very small, take a sip gently, and then take a deep breath and swallow it. This action is very difficult. It took Ann 40 minutes to feel less hungry.

In order to divert her attention from the difficult swallowing, Ann always looks at a corner every time she looks up, coming and going dozens of times, and has a panoramic view of the environment in the store.

This shop has an open kitchen, and the environment at the door is very open, giving people enough time to stand and consider where to sit. The location is also a booth for four to six people on the high floor and a table for six to eight people on the low floor. The seats have sofas and hard chairs. This arrangement, which is similar to personalized cafes, requires more thought and money than the unified layout, which shows that the store is very attentive. Look at this porridge. Although the store made white rice porridge in advance, the store didn't add specific ingredients until the guests ordered it, and then cooked it for more than 30 minutes. Rice porridge and ingredients are integrated.

Until 10 minutes before going to work, An Cai glanced at the porridge left in the casserole and his colleagues who had been waiting for a long time opposite, apologized to them and reluctantly left.

(26)

For several days, Ann was quiet because she couldn't speak, and everyone knew her illness. She is happy to be at leisure if she is not disturbed. Just this Thursday, Ann's new book was sent to the company. She handled the whole thing and took the leader to move the book.

Ann looked at the accounting room. The cashier's building and the teacher are not here. Teacher Gao next to her is so busy that she can't stand up as soon as she sits down. She had to let seventeen go to the warehouse to get the cart first, and she was responsible for calling the people in the office downstairs. Downstairs, only Miss Mei and Joe are there. Miss Mei is the second in command of the company. Naturally, there is no reason to be asked to move books. Ann had to go over and call Joe.

Joe is waiting for the customer to come to the door at the station, playing with his mobile phone bored. He felt Ann's approach and raised his head with a wry smile. Ann looked at the smile and felt uncomfortable. It was clearly herself who was injured, but she still felt sorry for him. But work cannot be delayed. An idea was to be colleagues together, so he bravely said, "Mr. Joe, go and help me move the book."

Ann wanted to ask Joe politely if she could help her move the book, but when she spoke, her tone became an order.

Joe probably understands the present situation. No one else can help Ann, so he must go with him.

There is a slight problem with the book delivered. The title page of nearly half of the books is stained. The factory prevaricated because it was too urgent to ask for it, but Ann refused to buy it. Just three people check all the books together, and all the unqualified books are returned. In the process, Seventeen, who was very angry because of Ann's misfortune, had to tease Joe, but they didn't say anything.

"Some people are like this book, half good and half bad. I really don't know if they have any intentions. "

Joe could hear that he was talking about him, but facts speak louder than words and he had to stop arguing.

Ann was originally resentful, but with the support of the 17th National Congress, she became more courageous. Then she said something full of irony: "Some people are just bad, just like this ink, which is soaked in good pages. It is not obvious at first glance, but it affects the quality of the whole book. "

Joe's mood at the moment is very complicated. On the one hand, he admires Ann for collecting new books so carefully. On the other hand, after listening to these criticisms, he didn't feel good. Not completely ashamed, but not without shame.

(27)

Because of the seriousness of collecting new books mentioned above, Ann was praised by BOSS, which added a lot of points. However, overtime is not less than half a point.

It was Friday, and all my colleagues left as soon as they got off work. Those who went to the party, went home for dinner, and went to pick up girls all left, leaving Ann to work overtime alone.

The boss is on a business trip in Thailand, remote voice, let Ann help him write a book. BOSS dictated in Thailand thousands of miles away, and Ann listened to dictation in front of the computer for text input, and it took several minutes to react every time she was disconnected. However, after repeated tossing, the input speed of Ann has been improved linearly. He can not only input accurately when the BOSS is dictating at normal speed, but also modify the wording and straighten out the sentences during the input process.

On this day, because the boss had something to do temporarily, he finished the input in advance. Long-term overtime has formed the habit of eating after eight o'clock, so I haven't felt very hungry yet After going downstairs to go to the toilet, Ann passed by Joe's station. Suddenly curious, the tie went over and sat down.

Ann felt that Joe looked at her with mental retardation and poor self-care ability. The table should be in a mess, but she wiped it with her hand without a trace of dust. Several books and notebooks on the desk are also neatly arranged.

Looking at these, Ann's memory of Joe began to revive. She lived over and over again, just like a movie. Remembering that she didn't really know what kind of person Joe was, and there was no relationship between them, Ann's mood suddenly became depressed.

With the feeling of the heroine in the sad love song MV, Ann gently took down Joe's notebook and flipped through it. Everything recorded in the notebook is about work, and there is nothing unrelated to work, such as work plan, work summary and random thoughts about work. Ann saw Joe's handwriting, just like an ant crawling when a pupil first learned to write. It looks immature, inexperienced and weak, but strangely firm.

Small and thin notebook, only half written, can be turned over soon, but Ann stared at every word for an hour. She saw the training summary written by Qiao Gang at work, much like the weekly diary written by her primary school students. She thought to herself that some people would really keep their writing level in primary school all their lives.

There is also a book on Joe's desk, The Road Few People Walk, which is the first book, The Journey of Mental Maturity. Ann said to Joe in her heart, "You really need to grow up."

Just like a mother who looks after her children, Ann carefully observes everything on Joe's desktop, eager to find some ways to understand Joe through a little clue, but after coming to her senses, she feels ridiculous. Now that it's irrelevant, what's the reason and necessity to understand?

(28)

Time passed day by day. Ann goes to Joe's desk every day when she works overtime. She picked up his notebook and read it again and again. She thought about it over and over again. The same movie after movie, time passed unconsciously. Every day, Joe writes two more lines in his notebook. These two lines exist just like the hope of Ann's daily life.

Slowly, Ann began to send messages to Joe in a few words, sending him everything she saw and felt in her life. Joe didn't come back, which made Ann feel safe.

"I didn't ride a bike today. When I walked home from the company, I followed the route we took that day. I spent a long time thinking about many things. "

"I'm eating rice noodles. I remember two times when we ate alone, and all we ate was rice noodles. The first time you said you would invite me, I was embarrassed. I really didn't expect to like you later. "

"I just got back from working overtime, and the iron gate of the community is locked. If you still accompany me back, will the security master be free of opening fees as he was that day? "

"Today, I walked home from the park. On the road, I felt that the hair at the back of my neck was too long, so I found a shop on the street to cut my hair, as long as two yuan. "

Sometimes, Ann sends what she wants to say to Joe to her circle of friends, and many people praise him. She just wants an answer that he has never had and will never have.

She went to the dessert shop to eat taro and tightened her circle of friends: "I will reward myself every week in the future. Thank you for your contribution. I am sorry that I don't love myself enough."

A person was reading a book in the park, and she sent a selfie: "Being yourself seriously is the best response to the bad guys."

The company gave a reward, and she sent one: "Every step, there are praises, regrets and regrets."

One morning, she didn't attend the morning meeting. When she came back, she heard that Joe had won the sales champion. Ann was very happy and sent a congratulatory message to Joe, who replied "thank you".

Ann sent another circle of friends: "I didn't lose my childishness at first sight, but now you are you, you in my heart." Joe doesn't like it.

(XXIX)

I don't know how long it took, but Ann got into this habit and seemed to forget her pain. She looked at Joe's "Ant Crawl" and regarded Joe as a tree hole, and lived a full and warm life every day.

But a few days later, Ann saw that there were no new words in Joe's notebook, and dust began to appear on his desk. The next day she asked, only to know that Joe had gone home and got married.

When Seventeen told Anjiao to go home and get married, Anjiao was very surprised. The past suddenly came to her mind. She remembers all the details of getting along with Joe. She can't accept such a sudden blow. Seventeen, I said to her, "Have you forgotten? One day last month, we met his girlfriend downstairs. We asked you if you wanted to see it, but you didn't say anything. We didn't call you again for fear that you would be sad. "

Ann remembers that it was the last day of last month and the end of another training course in the company. Colleagues in the training ground are returning to the company one after another. Ann buried herself in the gap between her work and heard everyone talk about it in detail, but she didn't care. Now that I think about it, it is.

"Seventeen years old, is his girlfriend good-looking?"

"Pretty good, isn't it? Quite tall and thin, with a delicate face and much makeup. "

Maybe it's really heavy makeup, maybe it's just seventeen to comfort her. Ann thought.

"It's good to get married. I told you he would settle down. "

It's just a few short words, which Ann said easily, but I don't know what hit my heart, and it hurts faintly.

On the day when Joe came back from his wedding leave, he didn't bring wedding candy or invite his colleagues to dinner. He couldn't tell whether he was happy or sad.

Ann is thinking, is he doing this to take care of my feelings? But there is no way to know the answer.

When colleagues in the company asked Joe how he felt about getting married, Joe just said, "That's it." Everyone was still booing, and Ann quietly approached and listened, but heard nothing.

(30)

Three months passed quickly. The new book published by Ann has been listed, and the sales volume is passable. The boss's rewards are coming one after another, and Ann is heartless again. It seems that everything is back to the days without Joe.

Recently, it has been rumored that Joe is going to resign. Ann thinks it's good that he's gone, just pretend nothing happened and they haven't met.

But the facts are often not as good as people want. At noon the next day, when Ann heard the rumor, Joe sent a message about Ann going to the rooftop. Ann doesn't want to go. From the bottom of her heart, she doesn't want to have anything to do with this bad guy, but she still plays by the rules.

When it was installed, Joe was already waiting there. They stood side by side, overlooking the distance. From their point of view, Ann can only see the long road they have walked side by side.

"How have you been recently? I seldom listen to you. " Joe broke the silence.

"I don't like to talk, just do my own thing."

"What are your plans for the future?"

"What can I do as long as I work hard?"

Ann seems to be just answering, and seems to be asking Joe. Somehow, subconsciously, Joe is still a kind of support for her, just like an emotional outlet for her.

"I'm leaving." Joe didn't answer Ann's question. He probably just took it as a positive answer.

"Just go."

"I'm going to Xiamen." Without hearing Ann ask him where he was going, Joe seemed a little lost and confessed himself.

"So far, very good. Go with your wife? "

"hmm."

Ann didn't speak. She doesn't know what to say.

"Give me a hug." Joe turned to look at Ann, his eyes as gentle as the night he kissed her.

"No .. married, married, male, gentleman." Ann deliberately said these words stiffly, put all the accumulated sadness, dissatisfaction and unwillingness in it, slammed it in front of Joe, and then turned and went downstairs.

(End)