My parents said that after I die, I can spread my ashes in the Yellow River. Is this really okay?

My parents said that after I die, I can spread my ashes in the Yellow River. Is this really okay?

I think it’s okay, as long as we raise them well and bury them sparingly. As long as children are filial to their parents during their lifetime, that is the filial piety of children. Why should we care about how to bury our parents a hundred years later? Those behaviors of "being unfilial in life and screaming in death" are shameful and even look down upon...

My idea is that when I can no longer do the work, my children only need to not dislike me. , even if I can eat three meals a day and have a sheltered place to live, the ashes will be scattered everywhere after death, and that’s it, why bother...

I think it should be possible Yes. My father passed away last year, and my parents agreed before his death that he would be buried at sea after he passed away. My father left us on July 31 last year. In August, my brother, sister and relatives followed the sea burial ceremony organized by the government and went to the estuary of the Liao River for a sea burial. I personally placed the special urn containing my father’s ashes through a string and slowly placed it in the sea. On the water of the Liao River at the mouth of the sea, tears had already blurred my vision at this moment, and I knew exactly what would happen if I loosened my hand. So I didn't want to let go of my hand for a long time. Finally, I said, "Dad, I will always love you!" and then let go... Standing on the boat and watching my father's special urn (made of cardboard) float towards the sea, my heart was cut like a knife, calling for my dad...

My father pioneered sea burials in our family. I admire my father's decision after his death.

In fact, after death, there is no pollution through high-temperature cremation. No matter what kind of funeral, there is a way. However, there is no private land in China, and the cemetery has an age limit. Our generation is all a child. , in the words of the old man, I don’t know if anyone will come to the cemetery to sweep the graves in the future. If you don’t pay the fee after the deadline, they will clean it up directly. Rather than being cleaned up, it is better to have an eternal foothold, so I chose the sea as the final destination. Home may not be the best choice.

Honor your parents while you are alive, and wish all the elderly in the world health and longevity!

Written in tears!

I just believe in science, not superstition. My mother died two years earlier, and my father passed away two years after the ashes were stored in the funeral home. According to the old man's will, we rented a boat, bought flowers, and scattered the ashes and flowers into the Songhua River. I thought the boat owner was taboo about this, so he planned to spread it secretly, but the boat owner understood immediately and was very open-minded. He even sailed the boat to the center of the river and took a tour around the island. He said that every year many people rent boats to scatter ashes, and this has become a business for boat owners. It can be seen that more and more people are getting rid of superstition, which can not but be said to be a progress for mankind. In fact, from burial to cremation, this is a leap in human civilization. From the original confusion and resistance to the current established routine, this process has also experienced the game of tradition and innovation. The emergence of any new thing has With the end of the old. Think about it, only a small part of the cremated ashes are collected, and the rest are thrown away as garbage. Buying a cemetery and storing the ashes is just a kind of psychological comfort for people. But it is also an eternal concern. If everyone in the family has gone to work and there is no one in my hometown, will I still go back to worship every year if I am far away? Those who go abroad will never come back. Who will care about you when your grandchildren wait? Therefore, in order not to burden your children, you must not leave ashes.

My mother and father passed away last year. They told our three daughters before they were alive that they would not save them when they were seriously ill and they would not buy a cemetery after their death but would bury them in trees. When they were alive, we all expressed respect for the wishes of the two old people and didn't think much about it. Because I don’t want to think that they’re going to leave us, thinking that it’s something in the future. My mother fell seriously ill in March last year and passed away ten days later. We cremated her and stored her ashes in the funeral home. On October 20, my father, who was in good health, suddenly left after lunch and lay down to sleep.

My parents left us within a year. I find it difficult to accept and feel extremely heartbroken. Recalling that our parents raised us all their lives and lived frugally, we could not bear to eat or wear anything. My father ate leftovers for many years, and we kept all the good clothes we bought him and couldn’t bear to wear them. I have to save part of my salary every month to support the children of my brothers in my hometown to go to college, and to support the grandchildren to go to college. I also want to leave my last bit of money to my three daughters, as I am afraid of spending money to buy a cemetery.

The old man has been worrying about his children all his life, fearing that he would have to spend money on resuscitation for serious illness and money on buying a cemetery. When my parents were alive, I sometimes felt that they took too much care, were stubborn, nagging, and sometimes had some conflicts. When they left, every time I thought about their good things, I felt that I was busy all day long and didn't take enough care of them. So after they left, the three of us sisters did not follow their wishes and decided to buy them a cemetery to bury them together. In this way, whenever I miss them, I go to the cemetery to visit their graves and talk to them. Although Yin and Yang are separated from each other, they still chat about daily life and talk about things happening around them just like they did when they were alive. It feels like they are still with us, sharing our joys and sorrows. Therefore, I think that burying my parents well also gives me a spiritual sustenance in my heart. It is said that when your parents are one step away from death, when your parents are gone, you face death head-on. I really miss the days when someone cared about me, and I really want to listen to their nagging again. Everyone should cherish the time spent with their parents when they were alive, otherwise it will be very heartbreaking to think about it.

Whether it is possible or not is just a matter of concept

The year before last, I went to Guide, Qinghai. At the end of the Yellow River Bridge in Guide, I couldn’t help but be attracted by the clear river water and the scenery of water and sky. I parked my car and got off the bridge. I found that There were many piles of paper ashes and burned clothes on the shore. Not far away, there were a few piles of people burning paper and crying in obeisance. It felt inconsistent with the beautiful scenery, which aroused curiosity, so I took the opportunity to ask the locals for advice while eating.

It is said that a local funeral method that has become popular in recent years is that the family abides by the will and kills the deceased's bones at the bridgehead and scatters them into the Yellow River. On the next day of death, relatives and friends can go to the river to pay homage.

This is due to the fact that Guide is located in an area where Han and Tibetans meet. In the past, the phenomenon of Tibetan deceased being buried on rafts along the river has disappeared with the increase of modern consciousness, but the concept of not leaving remains has influenced The Han people. Coupled with the example set by Premier Zhou in arranging funeral arrangements, the Prime Minister's prestige is enough for many people to follow suit!

Nowadays, many local people, out of concern for protecting their children and future generations or considering the environment, are increasingly making wills that leave no cemetery or tombstones, and scatter ashes into the Yellow River for burial.

Filial piety comes first, and obedience comes first. Respecting the last wishes of the elderly is also a manifestation of filial piety, which is the concept of the times. Driving to the west, the voice and appearance are still there. As long as we never forget the grace of upbringing, remember the sincere teachings, and pass on the traditional virtues of the old man to future generations, this is the essence of grief. Tombstones are just a formality.

First of all, one sentence, just obey the old man's will, there are not so many taboos. In any case, let the old man follow his wish.

Our respected Premier Zhou’s last words were not to occupy an inch of the country’s land but to scatter his ashes on the great rivers and mountains of the motherland. His last wish was fulfilled by his wife Deng Yingchao.

My father is also an old party member and has always been in good health after retirement. No one expected that cancer would find him. We children were afraid that it would be difficult for the elderly to accept it, so we agreed to conceal our condition. When he was ill, he sought medical treatment. Some people said that buying a cemetery could pray for the elderly, so they decided to buy it secretly without permission. When he really couldn't hide it, the old man's last wish was not to buy a cemetery, but to bury him in a tree. Knowing that we had bought it, we didn't say anything else, but we did ask that we not make any fuss after death, lay wreaths, notify relatives and friends, or accept gifts.

I also said when chatting with my children that if I die, I only need to scatter my ashes in the Yellow River. It is a waste to buy a cemetery. If I want to pay tribute, I can take a trip to the Yellow River. This is the fulfillment of filial piety.

It’s not that we have any noble character and don’t want to cause trouble to our children after death. To be honest, buying a cemetery is just for two generations to pay homage. Whether the children in the future will remember it is another matter. Nowadays, there is such a large population flow. It is uncertain which city the child will grow up in. How can there be time and energy to pay homage? What is the difference between being ownerless after a long time?

Spending tens of thousands of dollars to buy a piece of land is not only a waste of resources but also a waste of time and money. It is not worth it. Just kidding, it’s so economical to buy a few more kilograms of meat and eat it in your belly!

Following the old man’s ideas is the greatest filial piety!

Why not? Respecting the wishes of the elderly is the best arrangement. I wonder if your parents are religious? Generally, people who have religious beliefs, such as Buddhism or Christianity, believe that the human soul is immortal and that after death, a body is left behind, which is of little use.

Religious people don't care about this body. As for how to deal with this body, it doesn't matter. So don't worry so much, just do what your parents want.

I find that your parents’ thoughts are similar to mine. I have always thought that after I die, I will let my children dump my ashes into the sea.

Since your parents and I belong to the same type of people, let me talk about why I have such thoughts. Mainly because of the following reasons. 1. I have never believed in ghosts and gods

I was quite superstitious when I was a child, because my parents are traditional rural people. Every time they were sick, they would ask some strange people to perform rituals for peace, but I found that it had no effect. Later, when I became an adult, I naturally understood everything. People are thinking animals. The so-called people entering heaven or hell after death are some means of deceiving the weak. They are nothing more than making you dare not do certain things.

In addition, I see many unfair people in society. After being hurt, I find that those who hurt others are living well and there are no ghosts to take revenge, so ghosts and gods are just a way for everyone to respond to injustice. Just spiritual sustenance.

If you don’t believe in ghosts and gods, you certainly won’t believe that you will enter heaven after death. After death, you are actually just a handful of dust.

Nowadays, many children are not around. Even if a cemetery is built, at most the first generation of children may come to worship you after your death. By the time the second or third generation comes, they will have long forgotten you. Who is it? What’s more, many cemeteries will be demolished with nothing after many years. They were bought with money and then sold by others. Last time, I saw someone using tombstones as floors. Isn’t this against the original intention? The original intention of erecting the monument. 2. The cemetery is just the sustenance of the soul

For many people, when their parents have passed away, setting up a tombstone is a place where they can go and express their feelings when they miss them. In fact, it is not like talking to their parents. , but in order to solve the unhappiness in my heart, I think it will be better to speak out. It does work for some people.

If you are such a person, then you can completely go against your parents' wishes and erect a monument after they pass away. Anyway, they are gone and they don't know it at that time. In fact, there is nothing left after they pass away. . 3. I want to send a message to my children

When I first had this idea, I wanted to tell him in this way that he should go out while he is alive, and there will be nothing when he dies. , Get along well with your parents when they are alive. After death, they are actually a pile of ashes, scattered into the sea, and eventually turned into dust. 4. Don’t spend money to buy a cemetery

Many cemeteries now cost hundreds of thousands. For those who make money, this is an opportunity to make a fortune, so they will tell you that you may be unlucky. The location of the ancestral tomb was wrong. I remember there was a family in our village. Because their two sons were in their 30s, they couldn’t find a partner. Their parents were so anxious that they finally found an onmyoji. However, they found out that there was something wrong with the ancestral tomb, so they finally moved the tomb. . Unexpectedly, the result after moving the grave was still the same. In the end, the grave was moved back and forth many times. In fact, the reason why their child cannot find a partner is because his child is too timid and blushes when talking to girls. It is not a serious problem at all.

Therefore, it is better to let your children spend hundreds of thousands to buy a useless tombstone after death than to let them use the money to live a good life every day, scatter themselves in the sea, and have no freedom while alive. However, at least you can swim in the sea after death.

So I think that since your parents said that you can scatter your ashes in the Yellow River after your death, this is completely fine. Look at how prosperous Qin Shihuang, Kangxi, and Cixi were in those days. Dig it out. In this case, what should we do in those forms? Pay a lot of filial piety to our parents when they are alive. No matter how good they are after they are dead, it will be of no use. It is better to be simple. I guess this is for people like your parents. It is the best comfort.

Do you think so?

When you are alive, you come naked and leave with a wisp of smoke. After you die, scattering your ashes in the Yellow River is a very wise choice. As far as I am concerned, living in this world, Tired physically and mentally, after a hundred years, we can return to nature, drift along the river, and travel anywhere at will, without pain or worries, why not be free?

It’s much better to have a good care and a good burial...

People have died a hundred times. If you think about it, it’s just one thing. Nowadays, most of them are only children, and their work and life are very stressful. No matter when and where they are, they should not cause trouble to their children. , even if someone burns paper for you in the future, after a few years, who will still know who you are?

So...you should treat yourself well for the rest of your life, live as happy as you want, and live as happy as you want! Stop thinking so much...

Personal opinion, I hope friends don’t like it and don’t criticize it.

Parents who do things like this must be old people who are well-educated and wise. I only have one child, and I just hope that the child will live a good life. I don’t want to put any pressure on the child. My husband and I have already agreed that whoever dies first will put the ashes in a vase. After both parties die, they will scatter the ashes in the river together and watch the rivers and mountains along the river. .

My grandfather had no sons, but my mother and three sisters were looked down upon by the people in the town and scolded by their brothers.

When my grandfather fell ill and passed away, my mother and sisters bought a cemetery and prepared materials for his longevity. As a result, the old man's nephew, whom he had not known for many years, came and took his grandfather, who was about to die, and said he would carry him home even if he died. It was strange that I took my grandpa home that night, only to die after entering the town.

Now it’s better. When he is at his brother’s house, his nephew takes care of everything. In 1990, my mother’s three sisters each gave five thousand to his nephew. It was the day when the local gravekeepers looked at it. It was eleven days later... Not counting the five thousand that came out of a funeral, everything that could be plundered was taken from everyone.

From now on, when I visit the grave every year, money is money and etiquette is etiquette. Weddings, funerals, building houses, installing doors, and building kitchens all require money. I don’t know the group. The first time the three sisters built a house, they gave me 5,000 yuan. The second time they built a house, they borrowed money. By this time, my mother had passed away, and the two sisters each gave 10,000 yuan... They couldn't let it go during the Spring Festival. It was just money to spend. Who would let the ancestors do it? His grave is in his property.

In the past few years, my aunt has become old and sick, and cannot help but go back to visit the grave. She also said that this is all she can do, and there is nothing she can do about digging it out, burning it, or chopping it up.

The old people think that when they go home when they are old, they will arrange a grand and luxurious burial, but they will leave countless difficulties for their children.

Nowadays, many well-educated and famous old people die without much care and without receiving gifts. They only have a portrait and three plain incense at home, but they have already turned into ashes in the crematorium.