What funny sentences can be used in writing? Be funny. .

1, Sima Qian was imprisoned many times, but he endured the pain again and again and wrote a great historical record with tenacious perseverance. Over and over again? Grandpa Sima, have they grown taller in the spring breeze? 2. Some people say that there are three major hates in life: firstly, crucian carp is prickly, and secondly, begonia is tasteless. I forgot the third hate, but I think the third hate should be: the third hate of ruined vision. Although it rhymes, I can tell you that Zhang Ailing doesn't need Baidu to say this. The last hate is: A Dream of Red Mansions is a big pit ... 3. Without vision, it's like a wild ghost can't have children. /Without a vision, you have no home like a ghost. A life without vision is like a dish without monosodium glutamate, which can be eaten but not fresh. A person who has no vision, just like having no spine, can't stand straight and can't stand back. He can only crawl on the road of life. The sun can't shine on him, and the goddess of fortune won't care for such a person. Vision, you are more important than air! I am always surprised to say ... 4. My father loves me like a family member. How dare you always be picked out of the trash by your father? The sun is getting closer and closer to us, just like a golden cake. This classmate ... did you come to the exam after breakfast? Poor ~ ~ Mo Mo 6. Premier Zhou's vision is that the country is strong and independent, and there are only four big words in his heart: serve the people! Maybe your Chinese teacher can tolerate you, but your math teacher won't forgive you! 7. I hope to have healthy legs and a smart brain ... Same as above, there is a kind of inferiority complex called self-confidence and a kind of falling down called getting up. This classmate is Socrates 9 in the new era. He has no self-respecting neck and can't support his confident head. I want to know what kind of neck is called a "neck with self-esteem"! 10, no background, go directly to the front desk. At first glance, I don't know what I'm talking about. When I think about it, it seems a little picky ... but when I think about it, I don't know what he is going to say ... just to rhyme? ! 1 1, why do eyes grow on both sides? Because they are used to looking forward. Classmate, your logic is beyond my rational scope ... 12, life is like a cup of boiled water, plain and unremarkable; But it is like a cup of boiled water with sugar, sweet; Also like a cup of boiled water with salt, salty. Is this ... or clear water? ! 13, the horse has fine hair and fat hooves, and the son steals the father but not the thief; Blind uncles and aunts have lived for half their lives, and no one has seen anyone. Classmate, are you Mr Degang Guo's son? 14, Montesquieu was born into a noble family. Although he lived a comfortable life since childhood, he looked at the changing clouds in the sky and suddenly made a decision that shocked history, that is, he devoted himself to the revolutionary torrent of the bourgeoisie. It turned out that Meng suddenly realized the night view of the sky ... 15, life is precious, and love is more expensive; If it is a matter of life and death, both can be thrown away. 8HD！ You can't make people feel bad just because they have been in the copyright protection period of petofi for 50 years ... 16, as the saying goes: how bold people are, how productive the land is. With such land, how can people be inferior? Therefore, we should have a great prospect for the future. I'm speechless ... what are you going to say, this classmate? ! 17, entered senior three, and lived a life of "getting up earlier than chickens, sleeping later than dogs, eating worse than pigs and doing more than cows". Although eating is much better than pigs, cooking is more than cattle. At present, my vision is ... poor child ... touching it sympathetically and saying to Gao Yubao: You see the wound! Zhou skinned is actually very human to you! 18, my biggest vision is to have the habit of swearing. Although I have to abide by the five stresses and four beauties, I am afraid that only sitting on the roof for three hours without repeating the same thing can I solve my grievances. Writing here, my palms are sweating, because I complain about this paper, because it determines my future and prospects. I 12 years' study career is decided by this paper less than half a meter and some ink marks. I'm not satisfied. But I don't have to divide it. Son ... Are you ready to go abroad before coming to the exam? 19, God gave us worldly desires, but we turned them into pornography and violence. Deep! 20. My vision is to get into a good university and find a good job, so that my son can get into a good university and find a good job in the future. Why do I think of the story of a reporter interviewing a shepherd boy in a political book? ! 2 1, many of my classmates had their eyes done in order to be admitted to military schools or police schools. Do what? ! Shake ... why are you doing this? ! 22. Haizi said: I want to find a house, facing the sea and blooming in spring. Save it! Now the seaside garden villa is expensive, and you can't afford it if you find it! On the 23rd, Premier Zhou stood on Shili Long Street and lamented to the sky: "He died before he could conquer, and the heroes cried on their coats from then on." His vision for the bright future of the motherland has made hundreds of millions of people cry. Shilichang Street ...? ! Fraudulent corpse ah ah ah ah ah ah! ! ! 24. Tagore said: The night gave me black eyes, but I used them to look for light. Do you believe Gu Cheng will come to you with an axe in the middle of the night? 25. By the Miluo River, Xiang Yu was holding a sword around his neck. He shouted ... He shouted: Qu Yuan, Xiao Qin, why did you leave me so early? ! ! 26, drunkards know: there should be no hate, when it grows round ... Su Shi told Ouyang Xiu: Everyone is familiar with it, I will sue you for plagiarism! 27. Tao Yuanming, who lives an idyllic life in the Peach Blossom Garden, wrote the famous sentence "The shadows are shallow and the fragrance floats at dusk" ... Good ... I admit ... Actually, I can't guarantee that the old man in Lin Bu won't be Tao Yuanming's neighbor. 28. When Yu Pingbo practiced the piano for Zhong Ziqi, he was looking for mountains and rivers, and the sound of the piano was his vision. Identified as BL crossing text! 29. Han Yu went to war with Liu Bang. One day, ... another article was identified as BL Crossing! Madame Curie invented fish radium, and her idea came true ... Madame Curie, you died unfairly ... Who knew this torpedo was radioactive! At 3 1, Sima Qian was brutally castrated and put up with humiliation, because he knew that "there are three unfilial things, and nothing is great", so ... So ...? ! Don't find a small attack to fuck boys? 32. After suffering from castration, Sima Qian had to endure the pain of breaking his leg ... I beg you! It's bad enough that grandpa Sima was castrated again and again! Stop abusing him! 33. After Sima Qian was executed for corruption, he wrote "Historical Records", which is a masterpiece of the ages, regardless of the decay of his body ... outrageous! I am completely speechless ... 34. I saw Sima Qian's great achievements and overall situation after being imprisoned, and I couldn't help but sigh: 360 lines, each line is the champion. Fuck, that's right And eunuchs can also be the number one scholar in this line! 35. Sima Qian, a generation of men, voluntarily accepted castration because he was far-sighted-that is, Datang did not have a history book of his own, so he endured humiliation and completed historical records for Datang. Lift the table! Who did Sima Qian recruit and provoke? I can't believe you won't let him out of this mess! He was abused from the Han Dynasty to the Tang Dynasty-please have pity on the old man, he has had enough ... 36. Because pigs = eat+sleep, I = eat+sleep+learn; So, I = pig+study really ... I am very touched. This is a simple and profound dialectics of the working people. 37. Time is like a cup of concentrated sulfuric acid, which can corrode everything ... classmate, are you the representative of the school chemistry class? My friend, face your vision with the feeling of death, and it will be closer to you. Then who dares ... 39. My name is Zhang San. I do my homework at home at three o'clock, but I'm thinking about three apples in the cupboard. My aunt knew about it and told my father. My father slapped me three times. Stop "three"! I know you are a candidate in Hubei! (Hubei Volume Composition Title: Idiom: Think twice before you act. A threesome must learn from me, and draw inferences from others ... What can we learn from the above idiom with the word "three"? ) 40. How many days does the hen have to give birth to chicks? So that's it, poor hen-I finally understand how cheap 2.8 kilograms of eggs are compared with your pain! 4 1, the three of us, father, mother and sister. Dare to ask-who are you? In the distance, a girl came. I want to see boys and girls ... 43. What is the analogy? Just give one example and compare it with three examples. Your Chinese teacher will commit suicide ... 44. Three people make up a tiger, and the strength of three people adds up to be as strong as a tiger, so we should unite. The Chinese teacher above, do you mind coming back to life and committing suicide again? ...