Help me adapt a script of peacock flying southeast. We will perform next week. Come on.

Funny script of peacock flying southeast

Role: Liu Lanzhi, Jiao Zhongqing, Jiaom, Liu Mu and Liu Xiong, the third matchmaker, narrate the background cooperation.

Props: handkerchiefs, mobile phones (2), Confucian fans, kitchen knives, tearable flowers and leaves, tables, chairs, handkerchiefs, brooms,

Narrator: Telling stories and singing plays to persuade people, taking the three avenues, good and evil will eventually be rewarded, and the world is right and vicissitudes! Today I'm going to tell you a touching love story, one of which is in brackets.

Once upon a time, there was a mountain with a temple on it. There are two monks in the temple. The big monk said to the little monk: Long, long ago, there was a mountain, where there was a ...? It's not a temple, it's the Liu family. So our story began.

In a dark month, I can't see the five fingers of the night, ah … no! I can't see my fingers in the darkness, only a figure appears like lightning, as fast as lightning, like a tiger going down the mountain and the autumn wind sweeping away the leaves. (In Lan Zhi, trot-super slow motion) She runs, runs, runs. Run, run, run, run. . .

Lan Zhi: Have you finished the race? ! (impatiently)

Lan Zhi (making a relaxed appearance): "Hello, comrades! I am the legendary Liu Lanzhi, who pays equal attention to beauty and wisdom and is gentle and considerate. .........................................................................................................................................................

(Jiao Zhongqing appears)

(Chorus: Could it be that I watched it in my last life just for this life ~

I would rather stay on the earth than fly in the sky like a fairy.

Jiao: "Lady ~"

Lan Zhi: "Xianggong ... I haven't seen you for a few days, and you've lost weight again!" "(They look at each other)

Jiao: "Madam is even more haggard. Did mom let you knit again? Madam has worked hard. "

(Lan bows his head and says nothing)

Lan Zhi (looking up): "... I'm afraid my mother won't keep me."

Jiao: "Madam, don't worry, I won't let you leave me unless I plead with my mother" (Jiao leaves)

—————— The second scene

(Jiao's mother sits in the front, and she bows forward. )

Jiao: "Mom, you see, I am gentle and considerate, respectful and filial to you. Why are you always dissatisfied with him? ! "

Jiao Mu: "My dear son is obedient. I don't care if you don't want that kind of woman. I'll find you a good wife. Well, there is an ugly man with Sister Furong's fingers in the master's house. My mother thinks she is loved by everyone, flowers are everywhere, and the car has a flat tire! ! That's a dragon with a dragon, a phoenix with a phoenix, and a mouse with a worm ~ ~ "

Jiao: "Ah? ! "(dizzy)

Jiao Mu: "Frogs match dinosaurs ~ ~"

Jiao: "Ah? ! "(Inverted)

Jiao Mu: "Oh ~? No, it's a beauty with a hero ~ ~ "

Jiao: "No, my children have made an everlasting vow, and they will be together forever!"! I am the wind, she is the sand, I am Ye Er, she is a flower, I am a crab, she is a shrimp, I am a cabbage, and she is a sweet potato ~ ~ "

Jiao Mu: "That's enough! Your daughter-in-law is so sleepy that she can't even knit a piece of cloth! Send it away quickly! "

-Scene 3 —————

Jiao (Jiao walks dejectedly from his mother): "Miss (affectionately) ..."

Lan Zhi: "xianggong", needless to say-(background: two other duets: good flowers don't bloom often, good times don't exist often, people are worried and smiling, and tears are spilled. When you leave tonight, you will come again ...)-Dance the yangko. "

Jiao: "Lan Zhi, go home first. I'll pick you up when I'm done with my mother." (The other two singers: I am reluctant to part with you, I am inseparable from you, I believe in you, and I bless you.

Lan Zhi: "Xianggong, I will wait for you" (plus action)

(Jiao sends away, and the two walk hand in hand for a while and leave)

Lan Zhi: "A monarch is like a rock, a concubine is like a reed, a reed is like silk, and the rock is motionless ...".

(Two people leave sadly)

Scene 4

Liu Mu (played by a boy): "Lan Zhi, why are you back?"

At the sight of Liu's mother, she burst into tears. (Lan Zhi takes a handkerchief from his pocket and twists it while wiping his tears. )

Liu Mu: Oh, dear! Oh, my God ~ What's wrong with you? Are you crying? Why are you crying? Even if you cry, you should give a reason first. How can you cry for no reason? You should also have a reason to cry. What makes you cry like this? ...

Lan Zhi: Mom, do you know ... (tender, sad, embarrassed)

Liu Mu: Of course I don't know. Only when you tell me can I know. How do I know if you don't tell me? Only when I ask you and you tell me can I know. How do I know if you don't tell me? I don't know if you don't tell me. Then I'll ... (Tang Yan's nagging)

(Narrator): Stop! Is that all you got to say

(Liu Mu silences Lan Zhi)

Liu Mu: Xiaolan, have you ever been wronged in your husband's family?

Lan Zhi: Yes. (Wipe your tears and feel wronged)

Liu Mu: Tell me, what happened. (Extremely distressed)

Lan Zhi (singing at the opening of the Beijing Opera "The Red Lantern"): Mom, listen to me ~ ~ (expression and attitude turn sharply) You say me, ah! When I was thirteen, I could mend clothes. I didn't sew those broken cotton-padded jackets and quilts in our house? When I am fourteen, I can make clothes. I said Wu Laoer next door was still pointing at the ugly man. (Mother Liu interrupts: Which one? ) The one with one arm long and one arm short! If I hadn't been handy, he could have put on such suitable clothes. And! When I was fifteen, I learned to play cotton from my aunt in the front yard. When I was sixteen, I would carry such a bright light on my back at the foot of the bed, and there were two pairs of shoes on the ground ... You said that a good daughter-in-law like me could not find it with a searchlight in broad daylight!

Liu Mu: That's right. that .

Lan Zhi: I just went to his house for a few days. I haven't been on the kang yet. His mother asked me to bring tea and rub my feet and back. Should I?

Liu Mu: (shaking his head sincerely) No.

Lan Zhi: I just got married for two days and took my husband away, saying that I was busy with business and left me alone. Should I?

Liu Mu: You shouldn't.

Lan Zhi: She asked me to make all the clothes for the next 20 years. Twenty years! (Holding up three fingers) Should I?

Liu Mu: You shouldn't.

Lan Zhi: (crying) My life is too bitter ~ I might as well die!

Liu Mu: You shouldn't. (still shaking his head)

Lan Zhi: I said I might as well die! (deliberately amplify his voice to make a heroic death, and stretch out an arm, waiting for his mother to stop him)

Liu Mu: Oh ~ ~ Oh! Oh, my God ~ You can't ~ ~ (Stephen Chow's voice) Oh ~ Xiaolan ~ ~ Xiaolan, you can't die ~ ~ You can't let me send the white-haired man to the black-haired man ~ ~ (The two of them are still, and the time is fixed to achieve the stage effect)

Matchmaker (we brought a boy to play) (on stage): "It's my turn at last! Ladies and gentlemen, I am a world-famous cross-century gold medal matchmaker, unprecedented. I love sweets and have iron teeth. Starting a business for decades, you can come back to life with golden words and jade words. Even Lian Yue said the day before yesterday that he would worship me as a teacher. Ha ha ha, oh, here she comes ... "(walks to the door and knocks.

Liu Mu: "Who, coming, coming ..."

Liu Mu (opens the door): "Grandma, who are you looking for?"

Matchmaker: "Oh, how can you say that?" ? I'm Huang Hua's eldest daughter (pretending to be shy)

Liu Mu: "Oh, I'm sorry. Miss, what can I do for you? "

Matchmaker: "Well, Ding, the third son of Lord Ye County, fell in love with Miss Liu at first sight and got deeper and deeper. It's too late for tea and dinner now. The magistrate specially asked me to propose to Miss Liu for my third son. (Singing: Liu's prodigal daughter, gifted scholar, Ye's prodigal son, look at her ~ Moon Bend, look at her! )"

Liu Mu: "(surprised, shy) Oh, my luck is in peach blossoms again! As far as the present form is concerned, I am really attractive. I think I was beautiful then, too, and I was not empty when I was away from home. Too bad I married someone else's wife. Or you can discuss it with my husband. If he agrees, I basically have no problem.

Matchmaker: "(shame) Aunt Liu ~ ~, I have come to propose to Lan Zhi!"

Lan Zhi: "Thank you for your kindness. Zhong Qing and I made a promise that we would never give up unless the sea turned into gold and pies fell all over the sky. You'd better go. "

Matchmaker: "Miss Liu, please think twice. Third childe, how can he be a high-spirited teenager, with a black silk scarf fanned by his feathers, pointing out the mountains and rivers, making grandiose remarks and being charming? Do you know Jay Chou? His modelling or learn from our three childe ... "

Liu Mu (picking up the broom to drive away the matchmaker): "Damn it, how dare you insult my idol Jay Chou ~ you old woman, how dare you say it!" .

Matchmaker (rushing out the door): "No taste, no appreciation. Oh, Jay, no matter what others do, I am the most infatuated with you ~ ~"

The fifth scene-

Narrator (taking out a handkerchief from the bosom and pretending to wipe away tears): Alas, seeing this scene, we have to sigh with emotion: people are born by their mothers, trees are born by their mothers, Liu Lanzhi is born by their mothers in Liu Lanzhi, and children are their hearts. Poverty inherits the wind!

As the saying goes, it never rains but it pours Just when Lan Zhi was unhappy about being sent, his vicious, despicable and dirty brother who collected the dross of heaven and earth and sucked the bad luck of the sun and the moon appeared. (Brother Shang)

The matchmaker (takes out his mobile phone from his sleeve, dials and says sweetly): "Hello, Sanzi?" ?

Third childe .. (answers the phone and frowns): "Hello! ! Did you get it? "

Matchmaker: "... little girl, I'm sorry. I told you all about your romantic style, even my favorite Jay, but that little woman turned out to be an asshole. She will never give up that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that.

Third childe: "I am dizzy! So you dare to call yourself iron teeth and copper teeth? Idiots, a bunch of idiots! I'm still waiting for this childe to come out in person! "

Third Childe (go out, shake a Confucian fan, shape): "The cool wind is credible, and the autumn moon is boundless. It's like a year to think of coke! Although I am not tall, strong and charming, I have a broad mind and strong arms ... "(I went to Lan Zhi's home and saw Lan Zhi come out).

Third Childe: "Wow! Beauty! ! (Excited to hug, Lan Zhi dodges. The third son hugged Mr. Liu and wanted to kiss him. After coming to their senses, they threw up)

Brother Liu: "Ah, if it isn't Third Childe, Lan Zhi, you haven't come to visit Third Childe yet!"

(Lan Zhi walks up to him uneasily and bows)

Third Childe (stepping forward): "Miss Lan Zhi hasn't been seen for a day, like Sanqiu Xi. You kept me waiting so hard. "

Lan Zhi (back): "Please respect yourself, son. I already have a lover. Zhong Qing and I have already vowed to each other for life. I am the wind, he is the sand, I am the toothpaste, he is the brush, I am the tortoise, and he is the frog ~ ~ "

Third Childe: "You are a swan, and he is a toad! What's wrong with that? Ah, is he as handsome as me? Do I have money? Do you have my taste? Is there an old man's hat as a county magistrate? "

Brother Liu (followed by his third son's flattery): "That is, that is, I miss our third son's gifted scholar (sneezing). He is knowledgeable, tall and powerful (suddenly squatting down at this time), handsome and natural, and is known as the pine tree crushing the begonia ... because our Lan Zhi was confused for a while, we must make this marriage a success!" (Despite Lan Zhi's opposition)

Lan Zhi: "Brother, how could you! I will never marry! "

Brother Liu (suddenly pulls out a kitchen knife from his waist): Do you want to get married or not? ?

Lan Zhi: Even if you kill me, I won't marry you!

Brother Liu: (angrily pointing, Lan Zhi is fearless) Good! You're not getting married, are you? ! All right! ! Ok ~ I won't kill you! I ... I ... I killed myself!

Brother Liu (immediately pleading with a sad face and putting a knife rest around his neck): Laner ~ ~ Just listen to my brother once. Mom, is it easy for her to feed us with shit and urine?

Lan Zhi: Here you are. .

Brother Liu: Ah. Besides, your little nephew, who is not yet full moon, is still waiting for surgery in the hospital. The cost of this operation has not been settled yet. .

Lan Zhi: This ...

Brother Liu: Our family is so poor that we can hardly open the pot. All the "Xiao Qiang" in our kitchen are malnourished and almost as thin as ants. Do you have the heart to watch them die and let us white-haired people send black-haired people?

Lan Zhi: But. .

Brother Liu: Lan Er ~ Lan ~ ~ Oh, my son is in bad karma ~ mine is in bad karma ~ ~ ~

Lan Zhi: All right. . Brother, stop. . . I promise. . Just say yes. . (Tears streaming down her face)

Brother Liu: Third Childe, this marriage is settled.

Third Childe: "That's good, madam, I'll marry you another day, hahaha" (singing: if you marry someone else, you must marry me, take the dowry and lead your sister with the carriage ... hahaha)

Scene 6-

Narrator: Zhong Qing heard the news that Lan Zhi was going to remarry and rushed over.

Jiao: "Miss Liu (sadly) should be called Mrs. Ye. Congratulations, (bitterly) hehe. "

Lan: "Zhong Qing, I won't break my word for that fat cat. If I want to break it, I must find someone like Liu Huan. Why don't you believe me? "

Jiao: "If the rock is square, it can last for a thousand years. Puwei sewed for a while, overnight. You will be a rich family of Ye family. What promises do you have to make? ! How about this, based on the principle of fairness, justice and avant-garde, or I'll find a sister Furong, so that everyone is fair. What do you think, madam? "

Lan (helpless): "I am anxious to have nothing, and I love you to the utmost without complaint." Qianshan blocks Wan Li, and this life will last forever ~ (singing: Qianshan blocks Wan Li, and this life will last forever, ah ~ ~, I would rather stay on earth than be a fairy flying in the sky).

Jiao: ... (Lan waves his sleeves away)

Narrator: A few days later, Zhong Qing was heartbroken at the news of Lan Zhi's death.

(Zhong Qing kneels in the direction of his mother's room)

Jiao (always bowing his head): "The soul is in a dream, and it is hard to pay, and there is no end ... Mother, please forgive my child for being unfilial!" ! ! "

Narrator: A few days later, Zhong Qing hung up the Southeast Branch and followed Lan Zhi. (You are the wind, I am the sand)

Zhong Qing: A good wife and mother.

Lan Zhi: Husband.

Zhong Qing: Remember our vows? You are the wind and I am the sand.

Lan Zhi: Hmm! You are crazy and I am a fool.

Zhong Qing: Is this the end of our love?

Lan Zhi: No, since we can't live together, we should die together to witness our loyalty to love!

Zhong Qing: Hmm! Then leave everything to God!

At the end of the speech, two people tore flowers and leaves at the same time. )

Two people: die together, not die. Die, don't die. die ...

Narrator: Alas, ask the world how to teach people to live and die together! Just as Zhong Qing and Lan Zhi were hovering between life and death, our story ended here. If you want to know what will happen next, whether it's dead or alive (knocking on the table), listen to the next chapter!