Personality signature of qq funny sentences

1. Yesterday someone called me ugly, and I cried on the spot. I am very sad and distressed, and I became blind at a young age.

2. Rogue is a kind of temperament; Old hooligans are a kind of faith.

3, some people like to take advantage, and they want to have children as soon as they hear the painless abortion discount.

4, everyone loves you, flowers bloom and fall, and everyone opens a coffin.

5, acne, more than 700 million a year, acne can circle the earth twice.

6. Do you know why you are always sleepy at school? Because school is the place where dreams begin!

7. In the past, girls gave their first time to their husbands, but now girls can leave their first child to their husbands, because your ancestral graves are full of cigarettes.

8. The happiest thing about going to school is that the head teacher is not here today.

9. Don't always talk about my flowery face. Beauty is not outstanding, ugliness is not novel.

10, the male god is behind. I wanted to turn around and smile, but I laughed a lot.

1 1. All the questions in the world can be answered with "none of your business" and "none of my business".

12, I kept all our memories, but now one of you is missing from my memory.

13, Tang Priest wishes you a happy life, Wukong wishes you good health, Friar Sand wishes you good luck, Bajie ... Don't you know what you want to say?

14, powerless, rich and poor, rich and heartless, without love, without fate, without points, and some are getting divorced.

15. When did your first kiss take place? /kloc-when I was 0/8 years old, I said to a girl one year younger than me: I will push you into the ditch if you don't agree.

16, I like clean and white boys, because I am really a swan.

17, the boss who talks to you about money is a good person, and the ideal person who talks to you about money doesn't want to give you money!

18, I asked a sister paper today: Why did you bring a rabbit when you were in the Goddess Chang'e flying to the moon? Sister Paper God replied: Is it too direct to bring only radishes?

19, went to the internet cafe LOL, next to the majority of primary school students, suddenly someone shouted * * came, check the ID card ...! I was nervous and wanted to run. I just woke up and found myself an adult. What a fart! I'm used to playing LOL, and I almost thought I was a primary school student!

20. When we remove the stumbling block laid by others, we may be paving the way for ourselves.

When I was a child, my deskmate lent me a video tape. I opened it and said, "Teenagers under 18 please watch it with their parents." Then I quickly called my parents. Later, I was black and blue all week.

22. I know you won't come with me when I reach out, so I reach out and see you stumble. You really came after me.

23. Who is the future girlfriend I am in love with now?

24. I never bully the weak ~ ~ ~ I didn't know he was weaker than me before I bullied him.

25. No one has blown cowhide so fresh and refined for a long time!

26. The saddest thing is that I waited more than 70 seconds for the commercial to see this episode.

27. When I suddenly turned around, the head teacher had stood silently at the door of the window.

28. Meet the right person at the right time and place. That may not be your lover, but your enemy.

29. Men have broken their heads and sent me money every day. Waiting in line for me to pick, I will never get old!

30. I want to learn Korean dramas every time I take the bus. The hostess leaned her head against the glass, but she was smashed to pieces by the bus every time.

Last night, I was bitten by mosquitoes all night. The next day, I found that I lost weight.

If I die, don't forget to install an air conditioner in my coffin.

If the sun doesn't come out, I won't go to school. If I come out, I'll go back to sleep!

Adventure made me meet you, and fate made me fall in love with you. I have something to say to you in my heart. But I'm afraid of hurting you. I think of you at this moment. I hope to see you soon. I really love you.

They say I look like Chow Yun Fat, but I look like Andy Lau.

36.who do you think you are? You are the spilled water. I don't even want a basin.

37. The bankruptcy of Durex is not a tragedy, but the bankruptcy of Durex is a tragedy.

38. If you want to invite me to dinner, please write down the number and go to the queue over there.

When this person is unlucky, he can frighten himself by sneezing, take off his sweater and electrocute himself.

40. I love you not just by saying it, but all my life.

4 1, in addition to love, there are radishes in other people's fields.

42. What should I do when I am old? Those square dances look so difficult.

43. Old people can't kill children, women and men.

44. A person had better not have a good memory, because the more memories, the less happiness.

You smell like her perfume. I knew it was not as expensive as mine when I smelled it.

46. Everyone who shakes his legs has a sewing machine in his heart.

47. If I die, my first sentence is: I don't have to be afraid of ghosts at last.

48. I planted my girlfriend in spring and harvested a bunch of green hats in autumn.

49. When others say "Hello Mom", you can say "Hello Son".

If your ugliness can generate electricity, power stations all over the world can be shut down.

5 1, girls with fat hands don't have to worry, the gold ring given by her boyfriend will be bigger in the future!

52. It is not easy to cheat in a beautiful way. The invigilator couldn't help but take a look. No wonder it was often found that year.

53. How did you get the most unforgettable scar? The cruel doctor cut it when you were born.

54. After listening to thousands of songs, the real life is still a person.

55. Modern teachers are so easy to do. They don't have to write their own lesson plans. They have everything online, and he can't do it in the student union. Live on the imperial salary and step on the bell to enter the classroom. The strength of the school has been saved, and tutoring is popular!

56. Yes, I just like you so much that I'm scared.

Some people are alive, but she is dead. Some people are still alive, and he should have died!

58. Some people actually don't like the ugliness of the new version of RMB. No matter what he becomes, I will always love him. What I care about is not his appearance. I think this is the so-called true love.

59. Failure is success. Damn it, I already have many mothers, but none of them are pregnant.

60. If there were no perverts in the world, would beauty still be valuable?

6 1, if you think I'm fat, just say it, don't beat around the bush and say, "You really have to take it one step at a time"!

62. College students chose the zoo for their first meeting after work. By the same token, only here can they feel that they are still individuals!

Actually, I'm not stupid. I'm just too lazy to be smart.

64. I long for freedom, but the human body doesn't know how to climb out of the dog hole!

65. After the salary is paid, a week of arrogance, a week of saving and a week of expectation will pass.

66. Go west, cross the Terminator Line, cross the Japan Line, and go back to the day when I first met you.

67. Whenever I feel your eyes, my whole head will be filled with happiness.

68. The road is long, and I will walk with you, without complaining or frowning.

69. Close your left eye and see your lovely shyness.

90% women don't like men in pink shirts, but 90% men in pink shirts don't like women.

7 1. I think the fact that you like me is very correct.

72. You can't laugh at your mobile phone at home, and your parents will think you are in love.

73. What is happiness? Happiness is that cats eat fish, dogs eat meat, and Altman beats small monsters.

74. Study hard for China! A pack of China cigarettes is a lot of money!

75. People who have never stood in the same place will not know what it feels like to stand for a long time without bending their legs.

76. I like to rely on you, and the stars depend on the night sky.

Fortunately, when he had many choices, he chose to stay with you.

78. Yesterday, while visiting the space, my sister saw a female classmate make a speech: What will happen if tears stay? Sister suddenly whimsical comments: big chest drops on the chest, big chest drops on the feet. I don't want that person to answer me: is your foot okay?

79. I just want to go to a person's eternal life with this love that has nothing to do with anyone or anything.

80. I like you. The first sentence is false, and so is the second sentence.

8 1, you are a happy deer, jumping lightly on the green grass in my heart. How I hope you can wander on this grass forever, so that my heart will no longer be lonely.

82. I have tasted the ups and downs myself, and I am not qualified to say that I am not.

83. When Dad started playing WeChat, I pretended to be a stranger and added him, trying to fool Dad. Today, he began to tell me that he had a disappointing son. Hey, talking too much is all tears!

84. If I had the chance to go back to the past, I wouldn't go back because I still have you.

85. Do you believe that a girl will always come to this world to torture you?

86. I finally found a way to stay young, that is, take more photos!

87, the so-called beauty, three-point appearance and seven-point dress; The so-called temperament, three points of talent and seven points of pretending; The so-called gentleness is three points forbearance and seven points depression.

If I can travel through time and space, I must plant a durian tree in front of Newton's house.