Must know! Twin care and upbringing

What you need to know to use the right method to easily bring up twins! Care and upbringing of twins

It is not easy to give birth to a child, let alone having two babies come together at the same time. It is easy for outsiders to see It is the happy and proud side of a twin family, but what you cannot see is that parents of twins often need to put in more than twice the efforts of ordinary parents to take care of the two little ones who are waiting to be fed at the same time. The huge pressure in this is also *** Parts that social-related units need to pay attention to. What are the common problems and practical tips in caring for and raising twins? How can two babies who have been closely connected before birth go their separate ways smoothly? How are twins born?

Walking down the street, have you noticed that there seem to be more and more twins? If you look closely, why do some of them look exactly the same and some not so similar? Why are some of the same gender and some of a boy and a girl? Zhang Jue, founding chairman of the Taipei Twins Association, said that from a medical point of view, twins occur in the following two situations:

1. Identical twins

Identical twins Generally speaking, not only are the genders the same, but they also look almost exactly the same. It is even difficult for parents to tell them apart. The process of their birth is due to endocrine changes in the mother's body, which causes the fertilized egg to automatically divide after it is formed, splitting into two or more fertilized eggs. Eggs, therefore, the babies will have similar physical and genetic properties, and because the genes come from the same source, they will also have the same gender and appearance.

2. Fraternal twins

Another situation is that due to abnormal ovulation of the mother or the intervention of artificial reproductive medicine, the mother’s uterus has multiple The eggs are fertilized separately to form two or more fertilized eggs. These babies each have different genes and do not necessarily have the same genetic characteristics. They do not look as similar as identical twins. They are called fraternal twins. Their genders may be the same or different. When the genders are different, they are commonly known as "dragon and phoenix".

There are more and more twins!

Another situation is that due to abnormal ovulation of the mother or the intervention of artificial reproductive medicine, there are multiple eggs in the mother's uterus, which are fertilized separately, forming two or more fertilized eggs, and each of these babies has Different genes do not necessarily have the same genetic characteristics, and they do not look as similar as identical twins, which are called fraternal twins. Their genders may be the same or different. When the genders are different, they are commonly known as "dragon and phoenix".

Thanks to artificial reproductive technology

Xue Huizhen, director of the Nursing Department of Taiwan Adventist Hospital, pointed out that compared with the past, there seem to be more and more twins now! For example, at Taiwan Adventist Hospital, there are always 5 or 6 pairs of twins who cannot escape every month, and most of them are fraternal twins. The reason for the increase is mainly due to the advancement of artificial reproduction technology, because more and more mothers are taking ovulation injections. Injections or taking ovulation drugs can cause multiple eggs to be released at one time; in addition, scientific methods such as artificial insemination or in vitro fertilization will also increase the chance of giving birth to fraternal twins, because in order to increase the success rate of conception, doctors often release 2 to 4 eggs at a time. If more than one fertilized egg enters the uterus, the chance of giving birth to twins or multiples increases.

Twins are often born prematurely

If the twins are born at full term, there will be no development problems. However, most twins are born prematurely, so the incidence of diseases caused by premature birth is higher than Single babies are more likely to have neurological, visual, respiratory, and other related problems than single babies. The chance of congenital organ development abnormalities is also greater than that of single babies, so more attention is needed. In addition, twin newborns are smaller than ordinary single babies, so on average, their ability to sit, stand, speak, etc. will be delayed by about 2 to 3 months. They need to actively participate in early treatment and evaluation so that they can be treated as early as possible. If the problem is discovered and relevant treatment is received as early as possible, the twins will gradually catch up with normal development. However, in the long run, the development of these twins after 1 to 2 years will probably be almost the same as that of ordinary children. Daily care

Properly distinguish twin babies

It is very important to take measures to distinguish the two babies, so as not to cause one baby to drink milk and change diapers repeatedly, and the other baby A situation in which a baby cannot be cared for properly.

Although it is easier to identify fraternal twins or twins, it is still difficult to tell them apart when the babies are young. What's more, if the twins are identical, the similarity is more than 80%, and even the biological parents can easily get confused. Xue Huizhen, the head nurse, said that in order to prevent parents from making mistakes, the hospital will leave hand or foot rings when the babies are discharged, so that parents can carefully identify the characteristics before cutting them off at home; even for identical twins, if you observe them carefully, they will There will also be some different characteristics on the body, such as: one is larger and one is smaller, one is pointed and one is rounded, the hair spiral direction is different, whether there are birthmarks, the amount of hair... etc. "Mommies who have just given birth are really forgetful. If you are not sure, you can also wear different colors and safe material bracelets for your baby, or wear different colors of clothes, so as not to cause problems in life. In addition, using two different notebooks to record the daily routines of the two babies, such as the time and amount of milk drinking, defecation status, etc., can also help mothers distinguish between the two children and not forget the order of taking care of the babies. "Xue Huizhen, the head nurse said.

Establish a consistent schedule

Teacher Zhang Jue believes that when raising two babies at a time, it is best to cultivate consistency and regularity in their schedules to avoid burdening the caregivers. For example, if two children have different sleeping habits and interfere with each other, parents will be deprived of their rest time.

Two people sleep together

Nurse Xue Huizhen also said that it is recommended to let the twins lie in a small bed and sleep together because they were born in the womb. Together, after a long time, the life schedule will be relatively similar. Parents who want to separate twins may be afraid that if one of them cries, the other will be woken up. If this happens, just take the crying baby to another place to comfort him, and then come back to sleep after it calms down. Interfering with the other baby, but if one of them is sick, sleep separately.

Feed at the same time? Feed separately? It depends on the development of the baby

Generally speaking, it is recommended that mothers feed two babies at the same time so that they can have enough time to rest. However, nurse Xue Huizhen pointed out that sometimes babies who have just returned home It may not be possible to feed twin babies at the same time in the first few weeks, because most twins have premature birth problems, their lungs are not yet mature, and their muscles are not yet fully developed, so the sucking power is not as strong as that of full-term babies. One sucking The time is not as long as that of a full-term child, and a break is needed in the middle. At this time, their stomachs are also relatively small and they cannot drink so much milk at one time. Mommy may need to take turns feeding the two babies. When the babies are more mature and their sucking power becomes better, they can feed the two babies at the same time in a "rugby style" way. Feeding two babies. Avoid mutual infection of diseases

Generally, disease infections are mostly transmitted through contact. Because twin babies are very close to each other and daily necessities are often used together, it is easy to cause multiple infections and prolong the recovery time. Therefore, when one of the twin babies is sick, the parents should isolate the two babies appropriately. They must also wash their hands thoroughly when taking care of another baby. It would be better if there is another caregiver to help. In addition, no matter how close the twins are, from the perspective of disease prevention, it is still recommended to use their daily necessities separately, such as bottles, towels, clothing, etc., in order to effectively avoid cross-infection of diseases. Tips to get started

Nurse manager Xue Huizhen suggests that mommy should communicate with her dad and her family before giving birth, and go home to take care of the details of the twin babies, so as to prevent mommy from being overly tired and nervous. Problems that create emotional distress.

1. Taking care of twin babies must involve the whole family. We must not hold the concept that taking care of the children is the mother’s responsibility. The mother must feel supported to avoid the occurrence of postpartum depression. .

2. Mommy should also take the initiative to seek help, because it is best for at least three people to do the work of taking care of two babies, for example: a husband and wife plus a mother-in-law, mother, and sister Or sisters-in-law, everyone can take turns taking care of the baby, and each other can get a moderate respite.

3. For things that don’t require mommy to do it herself, such as doing housework, bathing the baby, etc., try to ask other people to help, so that mommy can use all her energy to breastfeed and change the baby’s urine. Take movies, soothe the baby, etc., so you don’t have to be distracted by chores around the house.

4. If there is really no manpower to help, it is also recommended to use external resources for assistance at least in the first two months, such as ordering confinement meals or asking maids to help clean up the house...etc. To be responsible for some housework, these matters must be confirmed before the child is born, so that you will not be in a hurry.

5. Moms who have older children at home should also think about how the older baby will be arranged during the confinement period after the baby is born, who will accompany him, and familiarize him with the environment and people in advance.

6. Some colleagues and friends may not be able to assist at home for a long time, but they can provide flexible support, such as shopping, driving, temporarily looking after children, cooking a meal, etc., during pregnancy. First sort out the list and record the supported items in detail. If something unexpected happens and the mother is alone at home, there will be a support system to help.

7. It is best to put a record sheet at home, clearly indicating the child's schedule and needs, so that the helpers who come to assist will know what they should do and what they need to pay attention to. Life and Education

Will twin babies compete for favor or be jealous?

Teacher Zhang Jue believes that when two children are together, there will inevitably be competition for favor and jealousy. When you hug one of them when you are a child, the other will definitely compete to hug you; when you grow up, the same will happen. When there are disputes over who is valued by the parents or who is taken out together, parents must understand that competition between children is the result of comparison. To suppress another person is caused by lack of self-confidence. Therefore, parents need to emphasize to them again and again. Children are treated equally, but children are also asked to point out where they think their parents are partial, and to come up with their own solutions to discuss with their parents. If the twins compare each other and care about winning or losing because of other things (such as who has more friends, who eats faster), dad and mom only need to stand in a counseling position and do not interfere deeply. Sometimes they comfort the loser and help him. Cheer up and tell the winner not to be proud and to keep working hard. If the imbalance is caused by deeper psychological problems, you can seek help from experts or discuss solutions to the problem with other twin parents.

Don’t ignore “no problem children”

Li Peizhu, a pediatric clinical psychologist at Mackay Hospital, pointed out that sometimes twins will have a situation where one of them develops normally and the other needs rehabilitation. Of course, parents will pay more attention to their weaker children. This neglected "no problem child" will easily feel frustrated and even jealous of the special treatment the other person has. "It is best to spend some time with the child attentively every day, such as playing together for 20 minutes after meals, reading bedtime stories, etc. During this time, you should not be distracted by thinking about other things, and leave the other child to the other child for the time being. The caregiver will take care of him, so that the child who is in better condition will feel that he is actually being cared for by his mother," psychologist Li Peizhu suggested.

Avoid neglecting other siblings

Teacher Zhang Jue pointed out that it is common for the elder brother and sister of twins to be only 1 or 2 years older, but because the parents are too tired to take care of the twins, they will ask They take on the responsibilities of their older siblings and even receive more blame. This situation can easily cause them to become hostile and bully the twins. Therefore, parents should pay special attention to the psychological reactions of older children and examine whether they are affected by their busy schedules. If you have forgotten their existence, it is best to give them some time alone with their parents. Also remind relatives and friends to pay more attention to them and praise them for taking care of their younger siblings, so that they will not feel neglected or isolated. . When others compare the differences between children...

The most important principle in raising twins is to "avoid comparison." Psychologist Li Peizhu said that it is actually difficult for parents not to compare at all, but at least they must not compare. "Tabletop", try to mention the different characteristics of two people in front of children or outsiders. When outsiders compare two children, for example: the younger brother seems to be better behaved, the parents should also mention the advantages of the younger brother and explain the differences in their personalities. The general principle is not to regard it as a "quantitative" comparison on a certain item, but as a "quantitative" comparison on a certain item. The focus is on the "qualitative" difference, and we try not to make "good" or "bad" comments.

Pay attention to lagging language development

Teacher Zhang Jue pointed out that in preschool, the language level of twins sometimes lags behind that of ordinary single children. This may be because they are used to talking in familiar sounds to each other (baby talk). To communicate, they have less contact with other people, which reduces the opportunity to understand the usual language methods in society, which will naturally affect their language development. How can Mommy and Daddy help them? 1. Ask the elders or brothers and sisters in the family to talk to the twins more often. 2. Encourage them to express their needs in words. 3. Use story CDs, nursery rhymes, etc. to familiarize them with external words. Increase the opportunities for twins to interact with others

1. Expose children to play groups as early as possible.

2. Increase the opportunities for individual twins to interact with other children.

3. Take the twins to children’s gatherings of relatives and friends or to the community park to play with other children.

4. Take only one child out at a time. Help children to be their own unique selves

Similarity makes people feel safe, while differences make people realize their own uniqueness. Even if twins are similar in appearance, they should still be helped to develop their own areas of interest and encouraged to develop individually. . Teacher Zhang Jue suggested that the following methods can help twins establish their own uniqueness:

1. Treat them with a positive attitude.

2. Try to call them by their names instead of calling them "the twins" in general.

3. Provide each child with his or her own private space or special corner.

4. Encourage them to develop their own friendships. They should have the same friends as well as different friends.

5. Their hairstyles and clothes can be different.

6. Students will be enrolled in separate classes, not necessarily in the same class.

7. Encourage them to develop their own interests and ideas.

8. The names do not necessarily have to be similar, complementary or have the same pronunciation, so that they have a sense of independence. Who cares about the mother of twins?

Teacher Zhang Jue specially reminded that *** At present, there is still insufficient attention to twins. Not only does there not be a specialized research database in China, but subsidies also need to be strengthened. After all, giving birth to two children at one time is very difficult for parents. Said, the burden is very huge. In the past, neighbors could help take care of the baby, but if modern families really need help, they hire a nanny. But the double cost for two babies is really staggering. I hope *** can provide more benefits to families with twins in the future, such as: respite services, short-term nanny-style home services, to help take care of the children when the mother needs support, so that the mother of twins can also have time Go buy some groceries, take a breather, and look forward to more breakthroughs in the future on the welfare policy for children with multiple twins.

Zhang Jue’s education: Master’s degree from Department of Psychology and Institute of Public Health, National Taiwan University, Doctor of Science from Johns Hopkins University, USA Experience: Founding Chairman of Taipei Twins Association, National Taiwan University Health Policy and Management Research Associate professor of the institute, member of the Human Rights Advisory Committee of the Presidential Office, member of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs, Ministry of National Defense, Mainland Affairs Council and other gender equality committees, and member of the Council for Suicide Prevention and Mental Health Promotion of the Political Yuan

Xue Huizhen’s current position: Taiwan Adventist Hospital Pediatric ward head nurse Education: Master's degree from the Institute of Nursing, National Taipei University of Nursing and Health Experience: Head nurse of the nursery of Shin Kong Hospital

Li Peizhu's current position: Pediatric clinical psychologist at Mackay Hospital