Talk about funny mood.

1. Every time I don't want to study, I tell myself in the mirror that if I grow up like this, I must study hard, otherwise others will say that that person has nothing but beauty. 2. Do you think that boys like it as long as they are beautiful? Do you think that as long as you have money, beautiful girls will post it themselves? Do you think you can find a good job by learning to bully? I'm telling you, all this is true! I am not as perfect and powerful as you think, and money and beauty are enough to conquer me! If I knew I was so tired, I wouldn't come back to reality. The time when you spent fifty dollars on deliberation has passed, and now you have to spend half a day on five dollars. 6. My wife asked me: If a female colleague seduced you, would you listen? I smiled and shook my head, ha ha, who do you take me for? Am I the kind of person who will tell you what you really think? 7. When playing with your mobile phone, you think that you will have an exam next week. Pa, I slapped myself, and you didn't concentrate on playing with your mobile phone. Unlike those of you who exercise in the morning, I have tried my best to just sit up in bed. Funny mood: 2 1. It seems that all people who have no money have the same plan: when I have money ... 2. To be honest, all I can think of when I hit the glory of the king is Shabi. 3. Recently, two dog was busy visiting the live broadcast, and brushed tens of millions for a female anchor. The female anchor is very happy. Two dog told me that he planned to spend tens of millions more. I said to two dog, "Are you crazy? Why did you brush so much money after watching a live broadcast? " Two dog: "You don't understand. If I marry her, won't the money still be mine?" I immediately fell into deep thought ... 4. It's a fine day today, and I'm going to play in the living room after staying in my room for a long time. The doctor said that my blood sugar was low and I needed a few sweet words. 6. Today, I taught my son: "Time is a knife to expose lies, but the biggest enemy in life is not lies, but time." The son asked thoughtfully, "Isn't it melon seeds?" Xiaoming was found by the teacher because he made trouble in class. Teacher: "Xiaoming, why are you so disobedient?" Write your name in class for 200 times. Look at others and listen carefully in every class! " "8. I was awakened by a phone call from a rich second generation sister in the middle of the night. She said that she was alone in the street, so cold and without money, and wanted to squeeze in with me all night. I picked her up and asked, Did you quarrel with your parents? No, I just feel that I don't have to do anything every day, and I don't earn money myself. My heart is empty, and I want to go out and experience the feeling of poverty and homelessness ... I know the truth and shed tears ... 9. It's almost double eleven, and I saw my wife's Taobao shopping cart full of things, and I had a brainwave and transferred all the money in the bank card to my mother's card. If the wife wants to ask, tell her mother that she is in a hurry to use the money and will transfer it back later. After transferring the money, I was secretly pleased. My mother called. She said excitedly on the phone: "Oh, my son is still filial. I'm worried that your dad won't give money to buy things! "10. Can money buy happiness? Money itself is happiness. 1 1. Some people like your face, some people like your voice, some people like your personality, some people like your life, but I am different. I don't like you. 12. At the age of thirteen, I was lonely at the bedside on a boring late night. Just two puffs, dad pushed the door and came in. I habitually sent one to my father, and he accepted it. No one spoke, and the quiet time passed slowly between the fingers of the father and son. Dad vomited a non-standard smoke turn, and then said simply, "Be patient when I hit you later, and don't disturb the neighbors." "13. This morning, the proprietress took her son to the company to find the boss. Looking at the boss's son, chubby and super cute. When his brain was short-circuited, he said, come on, let dad hug him. Then. . . The proprietress froze, and so did the boss behind her. . . 14. A buddy sent his girlfriend back to the dormitory. My buddy asked her what gift she was going to buy him for Valentine's Day. The girl suddenly became shy and said that she wanted to give you a surprise on Valentine's Day. Say that finish, she shyly ran to the dormitory. Suddenly, the buddy turned around and shouted at his girlfriend, you're not fucking pregnant! 15. It's not your puppy love that disappoints parents, but my girlfriend, not me. 16. Sleep if you are unhappy. I don't think there is anything that can't be solved by sleep. If so, then go to sleep again. 17. It is said that people with Xuan in their names were all shocked by cars, right? 18. I'm nearsighted, but I don't like glasses. Once I went shopping with my friends, in the sightseeing elevator of the shopping mall, I saw the scroll screen outside saying: Chris Lee is B, and I chatted with my friends in the elevator: Shit! Chris Lee offended this mall? How dare you shout abuse in public? The friend whispered: People clearly wrote that Li Ning's spring clothes were 20% off. 19. Nowadays, students want to find a boyfriend and girlfriend when they are full and have nothing to do, and I am more awesome. I don't have enough to eat. 20.Iphone is too difficult to buy. I tried it many times, but when I paid, it always showed that the balance was insufficient. Have you ever encountered the same problem? 2 1. Xiaoming's girlfriend asked him, "Who will you save first when your mother and I fall into the river?" Xiao Ming said, "fool, of course I will save you first!" """Why?" "Do you want to save you? The water level will drop and my mother will be saved. "