On the recommended naughty funny short sentences

On the recommended naughty funny short sentences

Lead: A swimming pool is incomplete without bikini beauties. Let's take a look at the naughty funny phrases I arranged for you.

1. New Year's resolution: Snowflakes turn into popcorn, and someone makes money to send me flowers.

2. Are you blind? You can't see such a big shield, but you want to throw stones at my head!

Let me be your mobile phone, so that you can hold me in your hand every day.

If possible, please allow me to destroy you on behalf of the moon, so that I can be myself.

5. Q: Is the daughter-in-law important or the game important? A: Of course, it is important to be a daughter-in-law, so I only dare to play games and dare not hit my daughter-in-law.

6. My classmate's mobile phone was confiscated by the teacher. When the students got it back, they were surprised to find that his games were all cleared!

7. The alarm clock rang and woke up my heavy shell, but the absence of the alarm clock could not wake up my sleeping heart.

8. Kangfu, when you resigned, did you consider the feeling of Doraemon!

9. The firecrackers never rang again on New Year's Eve. I think you think so.

10. The tortoise is hurt. Let snails buy medicine. Two hours have passed and the snail hasn't come back yet. The tortoise was in a hurry and scolded, "I'll die if I don't fucking come back!" " "At this moment, a snail's voice came from outside the door:" * * * Besides, I won't go! "

1 1. You look serious, as if you really understand people!

12. All the questions in the world can be answered with "none of your business" and "none of my business".

13. The wonderful life of the New Year has begun to cheer for you, cutie.

14. For bachelors, Valentine's Day is like a period. It hurts once.

15. If you are doomed to fail to give me the expected response. Then keep a safe distance.

16. You did badly in the exam! It broke my heart, not to mention my parents.

17. It is said that women in Wang Fu have several characteristics: they can eat, drink, sleep and spend money, and they are unreasonable and do not work.

18. Even if you are a piece of shit, I will not hesitate to rub it into pills and give it to you in warm water.

19. My 25-year-old cousin came to see me and I helped him take a bath when my girlfriend called. She told me to put me on speaker because my hands were inconvenient. She asked me what I was doing. I said I was giving my brother a bath. Then he suddenly changed his tone, grinned and said, wash up and eat when you come back at night. Then, my cousin cried with fear.

20. I'm stupid and I'm happy. I am two years old and I am healthy.

2 1. After studying for so many years, I think kindergarten is the best.

22. A colleague said that he has diarrhea on time from August 15 every year, and he has diarrhea for several days, and he keeps having diarrhea. Everyone thinks that the supernatural constitution has happened. Later, another colleague personally held a meeting with him on August 15, only to find that he likes to cut the moon cakes when eating them, and then tear off the deoxidizer and desiccant attached to them and sprinkle them on them.

23. Artificial intelligence cannot be compared with the stupidity of nature-because we advocate pure nature.

24. Do you know how many cards there are in my mobile phone? The battery is buckled and the screen is still on.

25. If I had known it was so difficult to find a girlfriend, I would have had a doll kiss.

26. Dad, what will happen if you put mp4 in water? That's broken. Dad, you are so smart. I didn't know until I did the experiment. How did you know?

Please remember that I am a cold-hearted person. Please don't be confused by my mental illness.

28. Maybe one day, when you put on your wedding dress, I will have put on my cassock.

29. Are you a man or a dog this Spring Festival?

30. How can I sleep when the sun is shining high in the sky? The teacher is kind and hypnotic. As long as I don't take exams, I will have many dreams.

3 1. When you see me staring at you from a distance, don't think that I am interested in you. I really can't see who you are.

32. It turns out that what I want most in my life is the kind of person who is great with two stinking money.

33. I have lived for 20 years and have done nothing for my country and people. It hurts every time I think about it!

34. According to the pig's aesthetic, I am basically a handsome guy.

People like me who don't even know a few famous brands sometimes don't even feel that others are showing off their wealth. As long as they see English, they feel so expensive!

I thought there would be a vigorous review on National Day, but now I really believe it if I don't finish my homework.

37. I don't want to celebrate the New Year, but I'm afraid I'll grow old.

38. Everyone has his own true temperament, and he has developed a heart of stone, just to let himself have a heart that dares to accept love and reality.

39. Every time I go to the supermarket, I want to take an indestructible card and stuff some shopping carts.

40. Just now I was eating pie on the balcony upstairs, and I heard a man and a woman talking downstairs. The boy said, can you fall in love with me? The girl said coldly: you want to talk to me unless there is a pie in the sky ... as soon as I hear it, I will throw the pie at the girl's head ... Come on, brother, I can only help you here!

4 1. Don't be infatuated with elder sister. I made you vomit blood. Don't be infatuated with me. Sister-in-law will cause a sensation.

42. She met him who was lovelorn and drunk on a rainy night and fell in love with him without hesitation. She cooks for him, washes clothes and takes care of the family affairs, but he always just looks at her faintly. Finally one day, he said to her: Don't come again, I love men. She looked shocked, threw him on the bed and said, damn it! If you didn't tell me earlier, I would pretend to be a crazy woman!

43. People with dark circles always feel exquisite and mysterious, such as me.

44. The scores of all subjects are closely related to the appearance of teachers in all subjects!

45. Happy Chinese New Year, sad marriage.

46. I have a little mind, but I don't lack it; I have a good temper, but not without it!

47. The words mentioned by life for you are composed into rock poems.

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