Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - Speech by the master fisherman (1)

Speech by the master fisherman (1)

Fishing, an online buzzword, refers to being lazy, doing nothing, doing nothing, and not participating in group activities. Similar to paddling.

According to the 10,000-hour law of deliberate practice, as long as you are willing to study hard, you can fish and become a famous teacher.

And I was lucky enough to be the only "fishing master" in Fiona Fang Baili, and was dubbed as "the man in the cracks". In other words, I can take out my personal entertainment time while completing my work with good quality and quantity.

Keep your absolute surplus value firmly in your own hands.

From my self-description, you can see that I am an invincible "swimmer".

Maybe you will say who can't fish? You need to teach me. Give it back to its owner. This is bullshit.

Yes and no, it's because you don't know how to fish. If your fishing is meaningless, or if you are caught by capitalists in the middle, your unjust enrichment will vanish in an instant.

Not only that, but maybe we can't catch any fish and lose the remaining bait.

Is this what you want to see? You're kidding!

Are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay? …….

It's okay. Eating plums is no good! Touch the fish if you have nothing to do! Fishing works.

(Laughter .. Funny laughter)

First, we have to get back to fishing.

Do you fish for the maximum benefit of yourself? Or simply want to get back at the boss?

These two purposes point in completely different directions.

For example, if you want to maximize your personal interests, it doesn't matter whether you want to relax, engage in sideline business or improve yourself.

You should remember that the image of being meticulous or opinionated is your workplace.

In one word, axially. What do you mean by that? That's not asking you to be an honest man, but asking you to have your own principles and procedures, so you should do whatever you have to do.

Orderly, not listening to opinions.

What is the core ingredient? If you don't take your homework, you will be a rigid person.

In my context, stereotype is not a bad word. It is the most effective weapon to maximize personal interests with a certain purpose.

It is not easy for anyone to meet you. It's your turn, it's your turn, it's your turn, it's your turn, it's your turn, and it's definitely done properly.

What not to do, gray, free, squeezed, unclear. Reject all.

What is our goal, what is it! Speak louder!

Oh! It turned out to be the maximization of personal interests!

So what we have to do is to maintain and preserve our precious surplus value as much as possible, and then put these remaining memories and energy into our own use as much as possible.

Ah, I guess you will say that the boss is not stupid. Whether absolute or relative, can I still have some of this surplus value?

You are all wet.

First of all, can you be a person who takes work as his responsibility?

No, if you think your work is of great significance and essential to human beings, or you can find a sense of accomplishment and happiness from your work, can you come and listen to the tips taught by my fishing master?

(The audience burst into laughter)

If you can keep hearing that something hasn't left here, let me know if you want to touch it.

Don't you think there are a few hours to yourself in the 8-hour working time?

Everyone who stays here is expected to be tomorrow's fishing star. Yes!

(Offstage: Yes! .. yeah! )

Next, I'll tell you the most useful method. Remember what I said earlier, while completing the task with good quality and quantity, maximize personal interests?

What, where is the core of this sentence?

(The audience replied: "Maximize personal interests!" )

Ha ha ha ha, ok! You talked directly about our goal.

But the method has not been caught yet.

What is the method? Must be quality and quantity to complete the task! What are you thinking about? Everybody! Who hasn't been defeated by reality? You also said that the boss is not stupid, so please go in and paddle.

Let's go fishing, but we still have to go to that class, right? You have to earn your own salary, so fishing is meaningful.

Or can it be called fishing? You became a full-time laid-off worker.

We must have a fishing environment. You say you have no working environment? Then what are you listening to here? Hurry to find a job and come back to study!

(Audience hahahahahaha)

Okay, okay, I'm tired of waiting. Don't talk too much.

Let's talk about how to complete personal tasks with good quality and quantity. First of all, you have to finish, then you have to pursue quality, and finally and most importantly, it can only be your personal task.

Hahaha, someone must be impatient, and you are still explaining the text here! Tell me the trick! Bullshit!

I already told you the trick. Have you heard of it?

No? Then how can you sit under the platform?

Come and listen to this nonsense?

Hee hee hee, don't go! The audience at the back will stay two steps! I just like you so much that I can't stop talking like this.

I won't allow people who have heard my speech to know nothing about fishing skills!

Here we go. What are the prerequisites for completing the task?

It's quantity! The limited quantity determines the possibility of your surplus value preservation.

You say that one person does the work of two people, then you are superman and have no time to fish! Isn't it?

(yes! Yes! Yes! )

Control the quantity, as we said before, I'll explain it to you again.

Personal tasks are one thing, and the number of personal tasks is another.

This is not the two sides of a whole, but the unity of contradictions.

Once unified, the number is fixed.

Don't say that you can't understand middle school politics at all. In short, you are familiar with your job responsibilities.

What can and can't be done.

Don't ask an old colleague if you don't know.

Not half a fisherman, who is the old colleague who can tolerate your less work?

That is, if you do all the work for him quietly, he takes the credit and you take the responsibility.

You said you were going to beg for that boring thing.

Just connect directly with the boss, what I can and can't do.

This question will certainly expand the scope of your task!

You should properly express that your ability is not enough to do the work in that area (you don't want to do it), and hope to do what you are doing well before you can make a breakthrough.

See, this is upward management. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. I'm not lying. Find out what you should do.

Making a living is making a living. If the boss tries to "make a living", it's no use drawing a pie for you!

Rejection is a virtue. Do you understand?

As we said, personal tasks and quantity are under control. That leaves one hostage! Yes!

Simple quality, the first two items will stump many socially fearful audiences, right? lol ...

I'm not laughing at you, that is to say! If your personal ability is limited and you can't open your legs or your mouth, don't embarrass yourself.

Give it up, okay? Giving up that is also a kind of happiness.

Everything is not forced, but a realm of life.

I won't touch it! Can I do that? I'll just go to work and give myself blood transfusion, so I won't be unbalanced when I see my colleagues fishing, will I?

Just go to work well. What happened to my society? Can't I roll it myself?

Swimmers who can get the first two, listen to me.

The quantity is under control. What is quality? Just a brother! Yes!

Come on! Repeat after me: "Wisdom is my younger brother!" .

Audience: (You are a younger brother! )

Hey, are you talking? Ha ha ha ha ha cocoa sex.

I went on to say that quality is to improve your efficiency.

Others can't finish what they do for eight hours.

No matter what you do, you only have six hours.

Our goal is to fish efficiently, and don't say anything after the task is completed. Is to virtually increase personal workload.

Enjoy the relative surplus value you have created for yourself! Squeeze yourself two hours of work every day, and you can find any fish. Liu wrote about trisomy.

Tell me about your heart! The heart is right! Improve work efficiency silently, don't worry when you finish, wait for other colleagues first.

When you've touched enough fish, it's time to get off work and hand in your work leisurely.

It is impossible to work overtime.

Why? Do you remember your personal design?

Yes! That is a rigid, stubborn and meticulous person.

If the boundary between life and work is not clear, you can't touch a fish.

Give up some workplace cakes appropriately, don't believe the boss's paintings to satisfy your hunger, and hope to quench your thirst.

There is only one Cao Cao in history. Can you guarantee that your boss can become a contemporary Cao Cao? The only one.

Taking history as a mirror, we can know the rise and fall.

People in the workplace want to understand that making good use of fishing time will multiply happiness!

Let's call it a day. If you want to know the second decomposition of "simply retaliating against the boss for fishing", please make an appointment for my next lecture!

Retail investors! Oh! No, no. The meeting is over! I almost cut your leek! !

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha